Waiting driving me crazy

[sarahharas]

Dear ladies,

since my last post a few months ago a lot has happened. I felt really really bad then and I took your advice to go to counselling, which really helped me. I also started to talk with my family and since then I am almost feeling relieved and further supported. I want to thank everybody here who shared nice and supporting words with me.

Since my Clomifen treatment did not not reliably work, I had now 2 cycles being monitored with a trigger shot. and now I am here waiting for my period to come. I am 12 days after ovulation now (ovulation was confirmed by blood tests) and I am expecting my period today. So far nothing. I know that this can have a lot of reasons. I dont want to test at all, I am pretty sure it is negative. But I have absolutely no idea how to survive the next couple of days. I am telling myself all of the time it did not work, but obviously there is hope.

Maybe there is somebody out in the same situation to help me?

xxx

[Arya10]

I’m glad you’re feeling more supported and counselling is helping. I’m not quite in the same position - still on natural cycles - but I am playing the waiting game and going a bit mad. Period is due today/tomorrow/Saturday.

I go from feeling positive and hopeful to thinking I’m definitely out because my pulse is lowering (tends to stay high for luteal phase then drops when AF is coming) and breasts not quite as firm. Ahhhhhh, torture.

[Hidden]

It’s really difficult when period is due- it was always the time I dreaded. 😢

I’d remain hopeful unless period turns up.

I don’t know how regular your cycles are ( mine are very regular ) so for me it was a sign & I tested the day after my missed period ( it was positive I’m 7 weeks)

I will keep my fingers crossed for you that it doesn’t show & it’s a BFP xoxo 😘

[Tugsgirl]

I don’t know how you manage not to test. I think I’d just have to know. I really hope it’s a no show and good news for you xx

[Hidden]

I am so glad you have had the support you needed. All my fingers and toes are crossed that you get a positive outcome. It does happen! Xx

[sarahharas]

Thank you all I really appreciate all your nice words. I dont test because the pain of a negative is worse than tje uncertainity.

It came - I hate myself for thinking that it could have been positive. At the moment I dont have any strength to go through this again, every month it hurts more.

xxx

[Hidden in reply to sarahharas]

I’m so sorry. 😢Don’t berate yourself we have to have hope, hope was the only thing that kept us going.

Do whatever feels right for you. I had various breaks due to surgeries & it helped xoxo

[sarahharas in reply to Hidden]

THank you Its really hard to have hope just now, but I will remember your words

[Hidden in reply to sarahharas]

It’s so very difficult. 💔😢 I allowed myself to feel sad, upset, angry, frustrated and full of despair the day my period arrived. The next day I picked myself up & kept going.

Sometimes a break from it all can do you good. Do what feels right 😘

[Aleelilook in reply to sarahharas]

I’m so sorry, please don’t feel bad for thinking it could work, hope is often all we have on this crappy journey 😞 you don’t have to make any decisions, speak to all the lovely people supporting you, speak to your counsellor and have a good cry 😢 xxx

[Hidden]

I'm so glad that the counselling has helped and you feel more supported.

I've got everything crossed for you and hope it's your time. x