Struggling with negative thoughts - Fertility Network UK

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Struggling with negative thoughts

33 Replies

Hello all. I don’t want to upset anyone but I’m really struggling today.

As some of you will know I got a faint second line on Wednesday and for that day I allowed myself to believe it might actually happen.

Then yesterday afternoon I started spotting 😢. It was almost continuous light pink yesterday afternoon and evening. I’ve also had some cramping like af is on her way. I really don’t know what to think as I’ve never experienced this. My first pregnancy was a mmc. I’ve had none overnight but it seems to be starting again this morning.

I’ve been stupid and googled 😳 Of course you read it’s normal and then you read it’s a sign of miscarriage.

Having been through a miscarriage before I’m of dreading it happening again and I’m trying to tell myself I can’t do anything to change what will happen.

I’m going to ring the clinic today to see if they have any advice.

I can’t help but have negative thoughts. I’ve not slept much and I’m overthinking everything.

Just reaching out 😔

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33 Replies

just wanted to send you a big hug and wish you good luck. Everything crossed for you xx

in reply to

Thank you appreciate it x

Sweets1 profile image
Sweets1

I’m crossing everything for you xx

in reply to Sweets1

Thank you x

Lou7744 profile image
Lou7744

Aww... I’m sorry to read this. The whole ivf process is a constant worry. Try and step away from google if you can... it can make things worse.

Hope the clinic can provide you with some answers 💕 xx

in reply to Lou7744

Thank you x

Please phone the clinic when you can. They will be able to give advice / reassurance. Hopefully we all can too. Spotting is actually quite common. It is a horrible horrible thing but really common and lots of people go on to have healthy full term pregnancies after having anything from light brown spotting to full on clotty bleeds. We are all so different and there is no one right or wrong answer.

Can you rest today?

Perhaps your pessaries are irritating your cervix, you could have some kind of bleed from a cyst rupturing, all sorts.

Usually there is nothing the clinic will do unless you get bright red blood that fills a pad in under an hour.

We can get cramping feelings from the embryo nestling in and out bodies readjusting to start the pregnancy. Any number of things can cause this.

Sending you big hugs and lots of baby dust.

Xxxxx

in reply to

Thank you. I will ring as soon as the clinic opens. I know they won’t do anything but might make me feel a bit better.

Thanks for the reassurance x

in reply to

Good luck. You know we are all here if you need anything xxx

Bless you, you are not upsetting anyone!

I’m sorry you’ve gone through a MMC must been a awful shock.

I had a CP & my chemical pregnancy started day after positive test with bright red spotting , which turned into fresh blood & huge blood clots.

I would say it’s better that it is pink, it could be where embryo is going through the second implantation stage .

Definitely worth ringing the clinic hopefully they can reassure you. Lots of women spot during early pregnancy & babies are fine. I know it’s very scary , but doesn’t always mean a miscarriage.

I would also be be very nervous too if I was pregnant again,it’s difficult anyway having fought infertility but a previous miscarriage will make it harder . Do remember tho that many women who have a miscarriage will go on and have a healthy baby, just because you lost one doesn’t mean you will again.

Keep us posted, really hope it settles down xoxo

in reply to

Thank you x

Sorry to read this Hun. I've never had spotting but had cramps nearly every day until 20 something weeks pregnant. Still have them some days now too. I was constantly worrying & panicking in the early weeks due to previous missed miscarriages but so far my little one is fine. Really hope all turns out ok for you too. Xx

in reply to

Thank you x

Tugsgirl profile image
Tugsgirl

Keeping everything crossed for you. I know it’s an anxious time when it really should be an enjoyable time. I’m not sure any of us ivf warriors are ever truly allowed to enjoy any of this, including the pregnancy part. It seems we have to work so much harder for everything. As the other have said though, cramping and spotting is really common in early pregnancy and hopefully that’s all it is, a common symptom xx

in reply to Tugsgirl

Thank you x

Melissa11 profile image
Melissa11

Hey, thinking of you, try ask the clinic to do a blood test. I’m sure they will. Xx

in reply to Melissa11

Thank you. Don’t think they do blood tests but I’ll see what they say x

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5

Its only natural that you would have negative thoughts, crikey think any of us would be the same.....and Ive never had to endure a miscarriage. It may just be a bit more implantation bleeding, could be a late settler in there. Also I know of ladies not just ones that have done IVF that felt like their period was gonna come any day when they were early pregnant. It must be so hard but keep your chin up lovely. Hope the clinic can offer some reassurance or even ask if they can do a couple of Beta hCG's for you?! Massive hugs.xx

in reply to Cinderella5

Thank you. Appreciate those words x

Autumnmoon profile image
Autumnmoon

Hope your clinic can help you in some way try to stay calm if at all possible there are lots of stories of bleeding which turn out to be alright and I sincerely hope that is the case for you hoping everything settles down and all is well sending love x

in reply to Autumnmoon

Thank you x

CC2018 profile image
CC2018

I had lots of spotting with my BFP including some clots. It turned out to be a slightly irritated lining and baby was fine- currently 12 plus 4. I also switched to using the pessaries rectally which helped. I hope your little one is ok xx

in reply to CC2018

Thank you x

Clover5 profile image
Clover5

I really hope the clinic can give you some reassurance or a blood test. I’ve bled on and off over 3 weeks and was losing blood clots aswell, but the clinic have scanned me 3 times and the baby is fine. They said the bleeding is nothing to do with the pregnancy as far as they can see, so try not to worry (it’s so hard not to).

It’s horrible when you’ve had previous miscarriages as seeing any blood sends you in to a panic. Sending love and positive thoughts 💕🙏 xX

Thank you. Panic is exactly what I’ve done. The clinic were good and said nothing to worry about atm. Easier said than done 😬

Lynnr54 profile image
Lynnr54

It’s definitely easier said than done not to panic. I had a chemical pregnancy with no spotting, so this BFP when I had spotting I was convinced it was all over. I think that’s pretty much a normal reaction when you haven’t had previous losses so when you have then the fear is even greater. For me, they found a tiny blood clot at my viability scan which was causing the spotting - they said it could be part of the placenta which had broken off but couldn’t guarantee it. My spotting lasted until 7 weeks then stopped. But I’ve read stories on here of ladies who have spotted up to 12 weeks and beyond and still had healthy babies. You could definitely try switching the pessaries to rectally to see if that makes a difference. I would also second the idea of asking for a blood test for reassurance and if your clinic don’t do them (mine don’t) I know some ladies have had success asking their GP or there’s the option of getting a private one. Other than that, all you can do is remind yourself of all the stories you’ve read about spotting that have turned out fine. As one of the other ladies have said, there are loads of ladies on here been through the pain of a miscarriage and gone on to have a healthy pregnancy afterwards. Good luck with it all.

Thank you x

I hope you get to speak to your clinic soon. I didn't get spotting but I had cramping on and off for weeks after my BFP, so it could definitely be getting comfy in there. We all spend years hoping not to to see any sort of blood each month and expect that we won't once we see the second line, so it can be a shocker when you do. I really hope it all works out for you xx

Jane_30 profile image
Jane_30

Hello darling,

I know it's hard, but... that's our battle 💪

However... I was bleeding, spotting (light pink / brown), had chramping... since 5dp5dt to 7w2d... and than spotting stopped... now I am 8w3d and it's all good so far (we have a heartbeat, baby's growing)...

So, please - don't give up, and try not to "google" so much 😉

But I understand you.... it's a hard battle... but you must stay positive - for you and fot little one.

I hope everything's ok... 🍀🍀🍀

I'll keep my fingers crossed for you 🤞

Jane

in reply to Jane_30

Thank you x

lisaboyle36 profile image
lisaboyle36

I had 5 days of spotting and cramps when I got my BFP. My little boy is now 9 weeks old x

in reply to lisaboyle36

Congratulations x

drinathan profile image
drinathan

I think you know all you can know but from my experience it’s good there’s been no more blood xx

🤞 xx

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