failed IVF : hi im new on here and... - Fertility Network UK

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failed IVF

1vfcf profile image
15 Replies

hi im new on here and trying to keep it short , 1st time using IVF my partner had the embryo placed perfectly in her womb , 10 days later which was yesterday she did a pregnancy test and it was negative , im sorry but I just cant except or get this , naturally yes I can understand hit or miss but when it is,, pardon the expression , man made and helped along the egg was placed into the womb already fertilised ! so how can it not work she has had no period , misscarage or bleeds ,, im just finding it hard to get my head round this and to me the fertilised egg is still inside her unless she has a period , and without going into detail she hasn't had a natural period in over 6 months , the dr's said everything was spot on , the womb lining e.t.c so how did it not work

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15 Replies
JMNE profile image
JMNE

Hi there, I’m sorry to hear it hasn’t worked for you. Many, many of us are in the same position. I’m afraid I don’t know the answers, I wish I did. Unfortunately sometimes the embryo doesn’t implant and pregnancy doesn’t happen. It sucks. It’s the emotional rollercoaster that is IVF. It’s the worst. You never know though, you hear of home tests giving negative results and then the official blood test coming back positive! I wish that was the case for me right now, my tests are coming back negative too :(

1vfcf profile image
1vfcf in reply to JMNE

but what I don't get is that if a fertilized egg is inserted but shes not pregnant or had a period where has the fertilized egg gone

JMNE profile image
JMNE in reply to 1vfcf

Could you maybe arrange a follow up at your clinic to have a sit down with the dr and have any questions answered? And to give you options for trying again. It’s such a tough journey.

genten profile image
genten

Hi and welcome

So Sorry for your news.

Unfortunately I don't know any answers as to why ☹.

Just such a hard situation. Xx

1vfcf profile image
1vfcf in reply to genten

but what I don't get is that if a fertilized egg is inserted but shes not pregnant or had a period where has the fertilized egg gone

genten profile image
genten in reply to 1vfcf

I'm not a 100% sure to be honest but hopefully someone here can help answer your question. X

Hi sorry I have no experience with ivf but if it’s only been 10 days is it not still too early to test? The egg would still be inside. I miscarried twice my last the heartbeat had stopped 4 weeks before I started to bleed and miscarry. If it hasn’t implanted she should have a period. I’m sure your doctor will advise you if a negative test. Were you told to test on day 10?

Niki_B profile image
Niki_B in reply to

If it was a 5dt you should see something on a test by day 10 even a faint line. I suggest you use the FRER tests (first response early result) as these are the mpst sensitive. here in New Zealand the clinic test at 9dp5dt which is a blood test. I don't know how you ladies in the UK have to wait even longer than that 9 days is hard enough!

1vfcf profile image
1vfcf in reply to

yes we were told day 10 but since writing this post she has came on a period

Niki_B profile image
Niki_B

Unfortunately ivf is not a guarantee. Who knows maybe in future one day it will be! I sure hope so for the future generations. Your clinic should have advised you of the odds or your chances. I'm so sorry I know how upsetting this is and it's hard to get your head around why?! If the embryo doesn't implant it just disintegrates into the body it really is so small you cannot see it with the naked eye. Again I'm so very sorry, take time to grieve and you and your wife can start healing. I hope you get your miracle baby one day xxx

Sarah_S profile image
Sarah_S

So sorry for your news. It's heartwrenching, especially when you've got so far through the process, and everyone here understands. From what I know there are 2 main reasons. One is failed implantation where the embryo doesn't "stick". The body just doesn't recognise it or respond, the embryo would just be absorbed, it is just a few cells. The second reason is the embryo not growing properly, so it would just stop dividing and disintegrate. This could be to do with the quality or some chromosome abnormality. All these things are common in nature and happen naturally all the time, when we would not even be aware. The lack of period might be just the ivf drugs delaying the inevitable. Your clinic should advise what is likely to happen, and might recommend some extra tests, or a change of protocol for a second round if you choose to try again. Support each other through this time and take a good break and ask lots of questions before making any decisions xx

So sorry it hasn't worked. I echo what Sarah has said above. Without ivf there is no 100% guarantee and, when as couples we need to use ivf it is the same. I do remember my first round that I too didn't even consider that it wouldn't work. The disappointment is so raw and difficult to accept. Please do as Sarah suggests and be there for each other. There is no blame and it simply comes down to a game of patience. We don't know enough yet about the whole process to get it right 100% of the time.

I am sure your clinic will offer a follow up appointment and should offer some free counselling too, along with advice on next steps.

The no period yet will be down to the drugs.

Give each other a big hug, have a cry, and hopefully you will find the strength to try again. Xxx

Billywhizz10 profile image
Billywhizz10

Unfortunately it often doesn't work the 1st time, more likely not to work than work. With our first cycle, we got a negative test and the period hadn't come. The drugs floating around her system meant no period at the time we tested. We were devestated as we had convinced ourselves it would work.

Don't give up hope, your follow up with the doctor will have good advice for next steps.

1vfcf profile image
1vfcf

would just like to say a massive thanks to all the comments and kind words , I am starting to understand more now and a big good luck to you all for the future , thanks

in reply to 1vfcf

We are all here for each other. Just glad you found the forum. Xx

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