BFN. Devastated 😪

[TeenyTiny]

So got my BFN on hpt 12dp5dt at 6am Sunday morning. Was still hanging on to a glimpse of hope that a different outcome might of come with my hcg bloods today, but sadly not.... nothing detected 😪😪 guess I was in denial 😫

So that’s it. Third isci cycle in one year and only getting one ever transfer done. Nothing in the freezer.... Gutted, devastated and the FEAR....will we EVER get there????

Appointment booked with our consultant for the 10th sept. One thing I know is I CANT give up on this dream of having our baby someday. Money however is definitely becoming a problem as in Ireland nothing is funded 👎

Last cycle we used donor sperm which finally got us a transfer, as neither our first attempts got to transfer with husbands sperm. I feel it’s time maybe I give up on my own eggs too and try embryo adoption!? Any thoughts ladies on this!???

Or any advice what questions I should be asking my consultant when I meet her. I do have autoantibodies as well, could this be a reason for implantation failure!!

God this nightmare just keeps getting worse 😪 HELP !!

[Dunla]

I’m really sorry to hear this. You’ve had such a difficult year. You must be feeling so exhausted by it all. I can fully relate to what you’re saying about money, it’s definitely a major factor. We had one NHS funded cycle but paid for our other cycles ourselves, including one with donor eggs which was really expensive. We have considered the possibility of using donor sperm now too. To be honest, if I knew what I know now before going down the donor egg route, embryo adoption would probably have been a better consideration for myself and my husband. Good luck with your review appointment and best of luck going forward xx

[TeenyTiny in reply to Dunla]

Thanks Dunla for taking the time to reply xx it’s just such a comfort to reach out to others in the same boat.

Yes, I’m going to research the hell out of donar adoption tomorrow. While trying so hard not to want to give my own eggs one more shot 😫 I guess our final decision will come down to what are consultant advice is. But having a plan moving forward is the only thing keeping me going at the mo.

Wishing you the very best of luck with what ever you decide your next step is. Sending love and hugs xx

[Tugsgirl]

So sorry for your bfn xx

[Aleelilook]

So sorry it was not positive 😞 be kind to yourself lovely x

I’ve not had embryo adoption however my embryos are from donor eggs. I asked a lot of questions from ladies on here and got loads of support when we came to the decision of using donor eggs, and I’ve felt as attached to these embryos as if they were mine own genetically! Definitely do your research, I’m like you could never settle after a failed round and needed a new plan! But remember to take a breath!

Good luck xx

[Cinderella5]

Hey, sorry to hear your struggles. We also did 3 ICSI cycles in around a year and it was tough going. Im not quite in the same boat but we decided to go down the donor eggs route. It is a really hard decision to make, to give up on your own eggs is so sad but we only ever got 3 blastocysts from 3 fresh cycles and no bfp. We wondered if it was sperm issues too (and our consultant wasnt convinced as we had a good fertilisation rate) but we went for a fresh donor cycle with my hubbys sperm and we got 6 top quality blastocysts from one fresh cycle. So it was my eggs after all and I look at those embryos as mine, all mine...well my husbands too obviously. The only thing I would say is if you are using donor eggs then try to make sure you get fresh eggs as frozen eggs dont have a great thaw rate.xx

[TeenyTiny in reply to Cinderella5]

Thanks for the message hun. Only getting my head together now to reply. Think we are going to do one final round with my eggs and donar Sperm. And then if we don’t get a result we will have to move on. Probably to embryo adoption. Going to get my body super healthy now, I’ve been reading “ It starts with the egg “ recommended by another on this site and it has geared me all up to get super healthy over the next 3 months before we start our next cycle. Thanks for the advice though on the fresh eggs, I’ve taken it on board also xxx

[Hidden]

Sorry to hear this. Ive had 2 private fresh cycles since August last year and only ever had 2 embryos altogether from both cycles. None to freeze. Poor egg quality and poor sperm quality. Didnt want to risk paying for yet another cycle and my consultant said a 3rd cycle might just do it however he was pessimistic. We have booked a trip to Cyprus for October instead were i will be having a tandem cycle. So one more go with my own eggs and a donors too and the best ones will be put back in. Me and my partner have agreed that this will be our final go and if it doesn't work we will move on with our lives. I have a 13 year old from a previous relationship so although im gutted he may never have a brother or sister i am grateful that i had him when i did. X

[TeenyTiny in reply to Hidden]

Thanks for the message. Only getting my head round to replying back to everyone now. Wishing you the very best of luck in October a tandem cycle sounds like a great idea ❤️

[Hidden]

I had a cycle with donor eggs and a BFN in June, we had one in the freezer but low quality I’m currently on the drugs with scan on Friday with hopefully transfer on Tuesday but me and my OH don’t hold out much hope so we have looked into embryo adoption abroad and for a lot less money you can get 3 top quality embryos with 70% refund if no full term pregnancy occurs.

We had a big talk last night and we can only afford one more round and we want to give it the best possible chance of it creating our baby so we have decided to go for it!

There’s a clinic in Barcelona that we had a Skype call with yesterday so pm me if u want the name and just remember that there are options and don’t give up!

Wish u all the best xxx

[TeenyTiny in reply to Hidden]

Hi hun. Thanks so much for the message. Only getting my head round to replying back to everyone now. Hope your transfer went well for you on Tuesday 💕

We have decided that we are going to go one more round with my eggs and donar Sperm. Then if all fails we are definitely going embryo adoption also. Did some research and found a place in Barcelona but would definitely be interested at looking where you found also. I shall pm you to get more details xx

[abcgirl]

Sorry to hear this. I read your other post too. If so many eggs weren’t mature this last round sounds like they triggered or collected eggs too early. Did they change your meds or protocol between rounds?

I think If you’re going to try again with your own eggs/sperm, I’d look for a second opinion at a different clinic if possible. I wonder if the lab just isn’t very good. Sometimes a new doctor with a different approach can be good.

I wouldn’t look to deeply into the fact you got a BFN this time... it’s hard but not enough ‘data’ to start worrying about what else could be wrong.

Otherwise CoQ10 is supposed to help with egg quality. But there are other lifestyle changes you and your husband can try. Have you read It Starts with the Egg?

[TeenyTiny]

Hi abcgirl. Thank you so much for your message. Took me a few days to get my head together before I could get back to reply’s.

It’s crazy though that you suggested we might of been triggered to soon. Because my husband and myself felt they had made a mistake with our trigger shot also.

At the time one nurse at one of our scans and told us that we wouldn’t be ready for egg retrieval till at least the sat. Next thing we Knew we were booked for the Thursday so two days earlier then expected!??? And for no explained reason, I wasn’t showing signs of over stimulation or anything?? I was so mad with myself at the time and still am now that I didn’t ask more question why 😫

Also our consultant left just as our cycle was starting so we were put under the care of another consultant that we actually still haven’t met yet only contact has been through email so far, so whether she changed the protocol I don’t know ! So bit of a mess to be honest 😫😫😫

Anyways aside from all that. I took your advice and downloaded the audio book it starts with the egg. I’m addicted to it at the minute and the bit I have gotten through so far has really inspired me to get super healthy in the next 3 months leading up to our next cycle. Cutting out all BPA 😂

Thanks a mill for the recommendation ❤️