2nd IVF attempt - Devastated

[Lilyrose7]

I'm new here and I'm really just looking for a bit of support and advice.

Today its been confirmed that our 2 perfect (or so we thought) embryo's haven't implanted and the blood test is negative. This is our second attempt this year. I'm 35yrs old, I have previously been pregnant (Different partner) and miscarried at 13 weeks. Have had 3 embryo's implanted in total, assisted hatching and embryo glue. Everytime I have a scan or check the clinic says everything is perfect, uterus good, lining exactly what it needs to be.....so why isn't it happening?

The 1st round we managed to get 5 eggs but only one fertilised as we had immotile sperm. This resulted in a BFN.

On our 2nd attempt my husband had a TESA and the clinic found motile sperm, of the 5 eggs they retrieved, 4 fertilised. All four survived to day 3 and 2 were put back in. The other 2 didn't make it to freezing. I started bleeding a week after we returned home but tried to stay positive.

We opted to go abroad for treatment due to the fact that my husband has children from a previous marriage and despite being initially accepted for IVF on the NHS, we then were refused at the appointment stage and told to go private. The postcode lottery! The cost here is £8000 - £10,000. We are using our own eggs and sperm.

I just don't know what to do next, my gp is happy to see us but after seeing my husband today about something else however my husband said it feels like the GP doesn't really know why he would be seeing us or how he could help!

Where do we go now, what do we do? How can my doctor help?

We can go abroad again as we have some frozen motile sperm but I feel as though I've lost some faith in the clinic if i'm honest but I wouldn't want to put my husband through that ordeal again just to do it in the UK, we just don't feel like were getting anyway and I just feel bloated and fed up.

Would appreciate any of your own experiences or suggestions, i'm at a loss and my wits end, why does no-one help those who need it the most.

[Hidden]

I’m sorry to hear this. I haven’t got any experience to share. The only thought I had was that you mentioned you had a miscarriage at 13 weeks- in London the NHS recurrent miscarriage clinic accepts women that have had one miscarriage at 13 weeks or greater so maybe that might be worth looking into? I hope some of the other users are able to help in some way. Sending you a big hug xxx

[Apdp]

Hi,

Kinda know how you feel. I’ve got unexplained infertility and feels like nothing is working. I’ve had 3 IUI, 1 fresh ICSI, 1 frozen and on my 2nd frozen. Everything always goes well but doesn’t work.

From my experience my doctor is good to talk to about how I feel but not great with what options are available. I’ve not been yet but have contacted the people who run the fertility support groups in my area. They had told me they can help with what options are available. Might be something worth checking x

[forMoira]

Sorry to hear this. I hope you can find the strength to keep trying.

[HollieW]

It may be worth attending an alien day at a clinic over here to get some advice as they are usually free and can discuss what has happened to date. I agree with your husband that your GP is unlikely to be helpful as their understanding of the process is usually quite limited and will say you need to go back to your treating consultant. You might also want to consider counselling. I have just started this with my husband after our failed transfer earlier this month. It had really helped with our communication and put me in a better head space. What is so difficult about IVF is quite often there isn't an answer other than the embryo didn't implant and they don't know why; especially in cases where the embryo is good quality and the lining is good. It's such an awful process and nothing really prepared you for it at all. I wish you all the best in your journey xx

[HollieW in reply to HollieW]

That should say open day not alien day!!!