Feeling troubled & confused!

[CBOO1]

Talked to my mum today about borrowing the money for our treatment - it’s soooooo much 😢

We are exploring a few different ideas on how to borrow it but I keep having these niggling feelings - should it be this hard to have a baby? Maybe I’m not meant to have one? Do I take notice of this or is it just my self preservation kicking in, trying to convince me that if we can’t manage it then it’ll be ok?!!

I don’t know where to turn or what to think anymore! How can this be so hard for some people & so easy for others?!!!

[Kyell2]

Yep it’s an absolute fortune and that’s exactly how I felt initially. Surely it shouldn’t be this difficult to have a baby...but it is for us and we need to give it our best shot!

Could you look at one of those multi cycle programmes and pop it on the longest zero percent credit card you can find so you don’t have to pay interest when you are repaying??

Sending hugs xx

[CBOO1 in reply to Kyell2]

I’m glad it’s normal to feel this way! Hopefully it won’t last too long!

We are looking into a multiple cycle whereby we have 2 goes but every time I talk to the clinic the cost goes up & up & up! We’re at £13,500 so far!

I’m hoping to borrow it from my mum so we wouldn’t get charged loads of interest, we’d have to pay a bit back to repay what she will of lost in interest but hopefully it won’t be anything like if we borrowed from a bank!

Thank you xxx

[Blondyboo]

Look at abroad it’s loads cheaper (€4500 for DE cycle)

[Tugsgirl]

Hey 👋 We all have doubts, I think it’s only normal. Of course it shouldn’t be this hard but unfortunately it is what it is and you’re certainly not alone there xx

[Hidden]

I looked at Greek clinic and it was much cheaper...they are also quite advanced in IVF treatments....

Xxx

[CBOO1]

I looked at a couple of clinics in Greece but we thought when you factor in the cost of flights & accommodation it would bring the price right back up again? I might be wrong - maybe if it wasn’t peak season like I’m looking at 🤣 xx

[Hidden in reply to CBOO1]

I think when we looked at it a lot was included in a fixed price unlike UK private clinics....I think it was about 3800 euros for full IVF cycle and 1 x transfer including all scans etc.....BUT I am not sure as we didn't need to go ahead in the end......maybe some people on here who actually did it could share experience of the final costs.....

There is no 'cheap' way unfortunately....

Our NHS area would fund a couple even if the husband has a child - they fund couples if they don't have children from their relationship. So frustrating how NHS doesn't have standard practice throughout the UK. We are so fortunate to have 3 cycles funded.....

Xxx

[CBOO1 in reply to Hidden]

Yeah it’s so frustrating & unfair that because my partner has one that we don’t get anything! Where are you in the country? I spoke to our clinic yesterday & I can’t even get the drugs I need on the NHS - I could understand if I had one as well from a previous relationship but I don’t. She said the NHS isn’t a bottomless pit & they have to draw the line somewhere - that’s all good & well but Ive paid into that pit every month for the past 16 years. And I know someone who has just had her boobs done on the NHS because she felt insecure about her body & she easily could of afforded to go private!! 🤬 Rant over sorry!! Xxx

[Hidden in reply to CBOO1]

Omg that is so frustrating and unfair.

I am in London in Hackney. A mile down the road in another borough they only fund 1 cycle. No wonder people move to different postcodes for this....

If you both had a child I would understand - but very wrong to not fund you for a child you share....

Just keep researching and asking the group on here - evenone has different tips and experiences with clinics etc.

Xxx

[Hidden]

For my last attempt i used IVF spain where they do different packages. Much cheaper than UK. They also do chromosome testing so you know that the embryo you are transferring is actually viable. If you can wait I done my treatment in Feb out of season. My flights were £16 and accommodation was cheap. Drugs are so much cheaper in spain than here so def works out better. I'm 20 weeks preg after 7 attempts and I don't want to think what I've spent over the past 4 years 🙈 good luck x x x

[CBOO1 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you, how many times did you have to go out to Spain? Congratulations, it was all worth it in the end xxx

[Kezbag]

Have a look abroad and also at clinics in the UK that refund your money if you don’t end up with a baby at the end of it all. At least then you have some reassurance that it won’t all be wasted if you don’t end up a success story. I hope that you’re one of the people that don’t get a refund though and you’re paying your mum back for years to come 😀

If you get that baby, it will be worth every penny xxx

[CBOO1 in reply to Kezbag]

Thank you 😘 I hope so too xx

[CBOO1]

Thank you, I’m glad to hear it’s normal xx