Second attempt at ivf?? : Big question... - Fertility Network UK

Fertility Network UK

33,380 members43,457 posts

Second attempt at ivf??


Big question! To try again or not??

Sorry haven’t been on here for weeks just couldn’t after failed first cycle. Was completely devastated afterwards. Emotionally I’ve really struggled but finally starting to get back to normal until today! Thought I’d got my head around a future but not sure now.

Today we had our cycle review. It’s raised more questions than answers for me. Went in thinking this was the end of the journey (no frozen eggs) and that I could deal with that. Came out with a partner wanting to self fund a second attempt but telling me he doesn’t want me to get hurt. They mentioned donor eggs and I know I can’t do that - just can’t. But am I up for a second go with my eggs. Can I put myself through this emotionally and physically? I’ve no idea. Desperately want end result but at what cost. Oh boy I’m confused! Really not sure what’s next!!

20 Replies

Oopps i just responded to your first ever post.... but i say go for it..... dont give up... hang on in there xxx


Id say if you can afford it then try a second round. How many eggs did they collect and how many fertilised? I used DHEA before my second round and it made a big difference to the quality of my eggs Xx

Just_starting_out in reply to Hidden

Three collected and two fertilised. One abnormal and last one was a day five blastocyst (apparently scored 8/10 if that makes any sense -they tell me that means good). They reckon there must have been something wrong with its dna and that’s why it didnt work. Sorry I don’t know what DHEA is? But might be worth looking into. Thanks for you reply x

We’re just about at the stage of thinking about booking our second cycle. We didn’t think there would be a second cycle (mostly for financial reasons but family and friends have offered to help) we thought we’d have to accept our fate. I look at it this way; if we all got the three rounds recommended by NICE would we have half as many hesitations as we do? Financial hesitations, physical and emotional? Probably not. If you are in a position to be able to self fund then why not give it one last shot? Even if it didn’t work wouldn’t you like to be in a situation where you can say someday “We did everything we could. We tried our best” and have no regrets, no what ifs? xx

Money is a problem but it’s not impossible. Good point on regrets, but when do you stop? Like you, we’ve tried once. I definitely want this but it can’t be at the detriment of everything else. Guess I need time to think and to talk to partner. Hope all goes well for you x

I think we all naturally reach a time when we know enough is enough. Good luck xx


I was given a gel called Testogel (DHEA) and rubbed it into my upper arms 5 weeks before egg collection. It has testosterone in it which helps improve egg quality but it is not clear how this happens. I had more eggs collected after using DHEA and they were better quality too. I also had weekly acupuncture for 3 months until day after embryo transfer, cut out caffeine, took Coq10 and multi vitamins, folic acid and ate healthy. Mine was not successful but it was a much better outcome than my first round Xx

Just_starting_out in reply to Hidden

I’ll certainly ask the clinic. Thank you x

I think you need to process what you have been told but as you are now starting to think about trying again I think you will come to a point when you feel ready all the very best whatever you decide x

That’s very sound advice and probably a good idea. Thank you x

Thank you x

I’m sorry that your first cycle didn’t work out - such an emotional rollercoaster.

I think it’s entirely personal choice - personally I would want to try again, just to shut down any argument from that niggly part of my brain that will be questioning “what if?”... I wouldn’t want to look back with regret, but rather be sure and confident in my decision.

But remember that each attempt is such a physical and emotional investment, so if you do go ahead, then you may want to have a longer break, perhaps a few months, before you start again. Just so you are feeling strong and happy.

Good luck, whatever you decide xx

It’s confusing that’s for sure. Thank you for your reply x

You don’t have to decide straight away. Maybe the best answer is to take a few months breather, then reassess x

If you are unsure, maybe you need a bit longer. You will know what to do if/when it’s right. I had the same issue with egg quality, no blasts and nothing to freeze after first cycle. They changed my protocol (went from long to short), my consultant also recommended 300mg ubiquinol daily for 12 weeks prior to second cycle. I also did weekly acupuncture and took royal jelly. I also ate low carb/no sugar diet but just whikst stimming/after transplant. The upshot was that I got two blasts and am now 21 weeks pregnant with a single baby. I wasn’t sure after the first failure that I could go through the emotional turmoil again, but I am really glad we tried. Good luck with everything xxx

Wow that’s amazing. Good luck x

I think it’s a very personal decision to make. Each failed round does take a little something from you. But if you play the odds game then the more cycles you have the more you are likely to succeed. I believe on average it takes 3 cycles for it to be successful. From what you have said it does sound like you might benefit from DHEA and/or COQ10 to improve egg quantity and quality.

One thing you might want to consider is looking into something like access fertility who do refund packages. They are a bit more expensive than normal packages but if your cycle doesn’t work then you do get a refund at the end of it.

I guess at the end of the day it’s about not having any regrets with your decision. Would you look back in a few years and think if only we’d given it another shot?

Whatever your decision I wish you the best of luck x

Thank you. I’ll look into both DHEA and COQ10 and ask more questions at clinic both sound like they might be helpful if we go ahead.

I’ve still no idea what I want to do but intend to just consider for a few weeks as yesterday was the first time we’d thought seriously about a second attempt. X

Hey there. How are you doing? I hope its all great. I am really sorry to hear about it. I know it must suck. However, you are strong. Don't lose hope. Take care. good luck.

Thanks lucyjones8, guess in the end it will all work out x

You may also like...