I’m fuming: Someone has actually said... - Fertility Network UK

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I’m fuming

Gillyc1 profile image
36 Replies

Someone has actually said to my daughter today that’s it’s early days so they arnt going to get excited for her yet. I’m absolutely livid and feel like getting in touch with them. I won’t though coz it will make it awkward for her but OMG, what is with people. Rant over xx

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Gillyc1 profile image
Gillyc1
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36 Replies
AJJ123 profile image
AJJ123

Maybe they are jealous, don’t waste your energy on them. What a* holes. Like that’s what you want to hear when you’ve struggled and gone through all this, you finally have something wonderful happen and you have ppl knocking u down xx

Gillyc1 profile image
Gillyc1 in reply to AJJ123

Her own SIL said don’t even think about the baby or names until you are 20 weeks. How awful is that. My head is pounding now xx

AJJ123 profile image
AJJ123 in reply to Gillyc1

Sounds like bitter jealousy to me, I dunno how someone could be so cruel especially knowing the situation. I wasn’t even 13 weeks and had named my bump - I knew it was a boy and sure enough he was. Even still, I hadn’t struggled at that point. Now I’ve gone through it that comment would make me rage xx

Gillyc1 profile image
Gillyc1 in reply to AJJ123

You would think at my age, 53, I wouldn’t be surprised by Ppl but I still am xx

AJJ123 profile image
AJJ123 in reply to Gillyc1

Well perhaps your daughter having a baby puts her nose out of joint ;) xx

Gillyc1 profile image
Gillyc1 in reply to AJJ123

Knowing her, probably yes xx

hopeforICSI profile image
hopeforICSI in reply to Gillyc1

ahhhh the world has insensitive people too. I kept my good news from inlaws till 3 months for I knew the same reaction, but I found out their continuous insensitivity until I delivered the Baby....by that time I got used to their side and started to show carefree attitude. because what we want for us, would mean most to us. And only those people would understand who know you and love you on top of everything like you are there for your daughter.

Just keep a distance from all those insensitive people because its time to live wonderful happy time after so much effort and prayers.

I wish all the best to your daughter's successful pregnancy. I think I would never forget how people feel and what they need when they go through such a hard time. Your daughter deserves all the love and care from you and that's the precious thing to have. lol xx

Just a little thought maybe the person who said it lost a baby early? Try and focus on all of the lovely things happening just now xxx

Gillyc1 profile image
Gillyc1 in reply to

We are thank goodness xx

elle80 profile image
elle80

I've just been at my dad's and he didn't really want to talk about it because he doesn't want to get too excited just in case and he doesn't want to jinx anything lol. My step mum was and said she's counting down the days until 12 weeks so she can buy stuff. I think that's fine if my dad feels like that. I don't want to get too excited yet either lol xx

Gillyc1 profile image
Gillyc1 in reply to elle80

You should get excited. You’ve worked hard for it my love xx

elle80 profile image
elle80 in reply to Gillyc1

Maybe after the first scan. Still feels totally weird right now lol xx

Gillyc1 profile image
Gillyc1 in reply to elle80

I understand that xx

I can completely understand why you feel so cross, unfortunately and frustratingly, we have no control over the words of others. People can be slightly ignorant of what they say sometimes. Forget those people and enjoy everyday that your daughters baby is growing in her and watch her bloom in to a mother, whatever stage that is 😘😘😘😘

Gillyc1 profile image
Gillyc1 in reply to

Exactly. Her stage at the moment is very VERY sick bless her xx

in reply to Gillyc1

And still that is something amazing and wonderful to celebrate 🎉 Children are absolute blessings, tell em jog on!!

julietyler profile image
julietyler

Negative people get on my nerves no need for it don’t say anything if nothing positive to say. Sorry bout the rant but I do hope your daughter is all good xx

Gillyc1 profile image
Gillyc1 in reply to julietyler

Thankyou so much xx

julietyler profile image
julietyler in reply to Gillyc1

Your welcome Hun I’m existed just from having the ET I’m on cloud 9 if anyone is going to burst my bubble it’s me positive thinking all the way.. and your daughter will be fine happy days.. xx

Gillyc1 profile image
Gillyc1 in reply to julietyler

Positive thoughts are good xx

AllWeNeedIsluv profile image
AllWeNeedIsluv

Omg I'm as mad as you right now. Stupid person it's disgusting, ppl like that don't deserve anyone's energy good or bad waste of space. Why would you say that to a lady who's fought tooth and nail to get where she is. I'm sorry but it must be some jealousy or something like that. Why oh why???

Hope your OK super mum. Hope Marie is too.

💝😘💝

Miss_Worrier profile image
Miss_Worrier

Some people just need to bring others down to make themselves feel better - it says more about them and their own ignorance than anything else. I’ve found other people and their reactions to this process is one of the hardest things to deal with out of all of this. Sending lots of love and well wishes to you and your daughter. Xxx

Gillyc1 profile image
Gillyc1 in reply to Miss_Worrier

Thankyou my love and hope you are ok xxx

Pure jealousy! Thankfully there are more genuine people in the world than selfish envious ones. I fell out with a so called best friend for the same reasons. Constant digs telling me to just give up, and what a strain it must be for us as a couple among lots of other nasty passive aggressive comments...no longer friends (I wouldn’t have minded but it took her 4 yrs to have her own egg donor baby...longer than it took me so it makes even less sense) it’s taken us all a long, painful journey sometimes to get to this point and we should celebrate, feel blessed and happy to be where we are!! Hope your daughter didn’t take it to heart and sees it for what it is. She’s v lucky to have such a protective mum xxx

Gillyc1 profile image
Gillyc1 in reply to

You would think Ppl would be really happy for you all. It enraged me xx

in reply to Gillyc1

I know but unfortunately some people are so consumed with jealousy, really sad! I’d have to call them up on it as it would be burning inside me xxx

Dancer84 profile image
Dancer84

Whilst it feels hurtful for you and, importantly your daughter, bare in mind where that comment is coming from? Rather than jealous I wonder if the person is doing it from a protective perspective? We all know the early stages are risky and and some people try and stem the excitement to manage their expectations and potential pain should there be issues- perhaps this is how the person is question sees things? Also, as someone else has said- we never fully know someone’s history and perhaps this person has experienced her own difficulties in early pregnancy, making her a little wary. Either way, I wouldn’t take it too personal and let it wash over xx

Autumnmoon profile image
Autumnmoon

Unbelievable how thoughtless and insensitive some people can be !

Gillyc1 profile image
Gillyc1 in reply to Autumnmoon

Not half. The thing is, we all know the risks but we don’t need reminding of them do we xx

Autumnmoon profile image
Autumnmoon in reply to Gillyc1

Exactly !

Looby25 profile image
Looby25

I think some people just don’t think before they speak, i was 20 weeks pregnant when we brought our first baby items and a close friend of my husbands said to me “I can’t believe you’ve brought all that, it’s such bad luck, what are you going to do with it if something terrible happens”.

I was heartbroken and felt ridiculous for letting myself get excited and buy things, I don’t think people mean to upset you but they are just careless with words!! All the best for your daughter, it’s so lovely to see you supporting her the way you are x x x

Gillyc1 profile image
Gillyc1 in reply to Looby25

What an awful thing to say. Some ppl arhhhh xx

Kizza07 profile image
Kizza07

My brother said this to me when i found out on my birthday i had a misscarage and another one the year after lets just say we dont talk

Gillyc1 profile image
Gillyc1 in reply to Kizza07

OMG, I’m so sorry. Insensitive ppl 😓xx

Kizza07 profile image
Kizza07

Yeah its not nice hun xxx all the best for ur daughter x

Gillyc1 profile image
Gillyc1 in reply to Kizza07

Thankyou xx

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