Feeling low-sorry for the long post- need positive stories please.

[CC2018]

We've been ttc just over 2 and a half years now and after all the tests have come back with the partly positive, partly frustrating, unexplained infertility. According to all the tests, scans, analysis, hsg, bloods, laparoscopy and a privately paid follicle scan everything looks ideal, with only minor things that we have been told not to worry about. For example my dh S.A. came back with a slightly lower than average morphology but a higher than normal count which basically cancelled this out. I have a slightly high fsh of 10.45 and possibly some type of lipids that make me a higher risk of mc. We have never been pregnant and it is this thought that is making me more anxious about our 1st ivf cycle which has already been delayed twice due to being full- nsh fresh cycle and only 5 couples can be seen at a time. I'm feeling more down than ever, especially as it gets closer to my 29th birthday as I naively had it in my head that I would have at least two children by the time I was 30 and we are not even close to having one. For the past few years I struggle not to break down when dh asks what I want for my birthday when he knows all we both really want is a baby of our own. It upsets him when I say I don't want anything as I know nothing else would make me happy so I have to try and humour him by picking something. I don't want to sound ungrateful for his gifts as I know he's trying and hurts him just as much but I really don't see the point in wasting money when I don't feel any happier. I felt like we were getting somewhere when we finally got offered ivf and for the first time was impatient to get my period rather than feel despair and grief each time it came but after twice phoning up excited to see if we can start to get a call back saying no try again next month the grief hits me all over again. It's like mental torture. I'm tempted to use our savings and go private. Is there anyone out there who had unexplained infertility, were never pregnant and got a bfp1st time with ivf? Just really need some positivity right now.

[Lovefood1984]

Hi, my story to cheer you up, we were trying for a year before going to doctors, like you all tests came back fine apart from hubby’s morphology but like yours he has more sperm than the average man (double) so that cancels out the lower chances. It was 2 years of ttc before our first ICSI cycle, never saw a natural BFP in that entire time, not even a hint of one. 1st cycle in Feb resulted in a BFP and I’m now 11 weeks and 5 days and a week away from my 12 weeks scan......don’t give up hope!

[CC2018 in reply to Lovefood1984]

Thank you- that makes me feel a little less anxious. I've found this whole venture has left me very anxious and at one point I was having panic attacks. Please may I ask if you did your cycle on the NHS or private and why they gave you ICSI? I have been wondering if that would be better for us. Congratulations on your BFP and I hope you have a healthy pregnancy x

[Lovefood1984 in reply to CC2018]

Ours was an NHS cycle, I’m lucky to live in an area where I’m entitled to 3 fresh rounds (plus any frozen) to get pregnant. ICSI was chosen by the clinic due to the morphology issue so you may find the same recommended, although they did say they’d decide on the day if my husbands morphology was better and they got enough eggs they may do a 50:50 split to see what happens but I don’t think with 9 eggs they felt like messing around. The only downside to ICSI is any male babies have a slightly higher chance of having fertility issues themselves (small but that’s why they don’t do it if they don’t have to). I hope they can fit you in soon, it is awful waiting when you are ready to have a baby x

[CC2018 in reply to Lovefood1984]

Thank you again. That's really interesting about the icsi, I didn't know that before. We only get 1 fresh cycle where we are so i'm hoping it will be a success. X

[Lovefood1984 in reply to CC2018]

Wishing you all the best! x

[Hope_4_2017x]

Hiya, ours was unexplained and on our first try at ivf we now have our beautiful son 😍 Good luck and hope they get you started soon xx

[CC2018 in reply to Hope_4_2017x]

Thank you and congratulations x

[Purpledazzle27]

My fertility issues were not unexplained as I only have one tube which I know to be blocked but perhaps you should see each month they can’t fit you in as an opportunity to prepare yourself for what lies ahead. Eat eggs, avocados and organic milk and meat and maybe try yoga. I did this before starting ivf and felt it made a huge difference and helped me to stay relaxed as I was quite neurotic. I was 36 when we started going to the clinic and because my husband is over the bmi for nhs funding it was delayed until he could lose the weight which was quite difficult for me as I had little control over this. It was worth it though as his sperm improved loads and the clinic ended up doing ivf and not ICSI so months of him losing weight and taking conception vitamins paid off. Good luck on your journey. It’s so hard xx

[Shanks_21]

We were diagnosed with unexplained infertility and I’m currently 34 weeks pregnant with our first baby after our first round of IVF - I’ve never been pregnant before.

I can understand how frustrated you must feel being told to wait another month but normally you’ll only be knocked back a couple of times and be guaranteed a slot after so many failed attempts hopefully you won’t have to wait much longer - try and stay positive sweet your time will come xxxx

[Tezzabell86]

Hiya CC2018,

My fiancé and I were ttc for a year and a half when we decided to both get checked. Had no hint of pregnancy throughout that year and a half of ttc. Our gp referred us to the fertility clinic and they took sample from my oh and did an internal scan on our first visit at the clinic where they were concerned about my follicle count (eggs in my ovaries) so I had an AMH blood test done. I’m 31 and roughly for someone of my age the egg count should be around 19.7 my egg count came back as 6.1. So the two options from that first visit was IVF or Clomid. So we tried clomid for a couple of months and did more scans and more blood tests where we discovered that I wasn’t ovulating either. And I needed to lose a little bit more weight in order to qualify for IVF. (I lost 7 stone in total) by our third appointment where our consultant said IVF was the only option and we were then able to qualify for IVF. So we started IVF on the 21st of October 2017 (our 5 year anniversary of getting together) and we managed to get 7 eggs at egg collection and 4 of them were fertilised and only one of them made it to day 5. And on the 22nd of November 2017 we got our BFP from our first try of IVF. I’m now 26+3 weeks pregnant with a little boy xxx

[SianieShorts]

I know this feeling sooo well!

We were trying to conceive for 3.5 years with no BFP’s. To my knowledge I have never been pregnant and this worried me.

Docs said, all was fine...I had a slightly under active thyroid which they put me on medication for but still no BFP.

I suspected I had a short luteal phase, though this was never actually diagnosed. A course of progesterone and a course of Clomid later and still nothing

We started IVF in October 2017, got our 1st BFP in November and I’m now 26 weeks pregnant.

I never thought it was going to happen for us, I had convinced myself that our eggs and sperm weren’t compatible.

We are obviously over the moon but I would say that I have only just started to accept the pregnancy. I just couldn’t believe it!

Please keep the faith. Just because you are having trouble trying to conceive, doesn’t mean you can’t carry.

Good luck on your journey 😘

[CC2018]

I just want to say thank you all so much for your stories. They have really lifted my spirits and made me more hopeful. Fingers crossed we get the go ahead next month and there is a BFP at the end of it xx

[Hidden]

Yes. Me. And I'm 35! Unexplained too.

I did get one positive pregnancy test a year ago but it was a chemical pregnancy; my period was only 2 days late, the line was so faint and I started to bleed the very same day.

Anyway, we started our first round of funded round of ivf after exactly 3 years of trying. I had 1 embryo transferred and 2 for the freezer - yesterday I got my BFP. I have had my funded cycle done at a private clinic so it might be worth looking into that option. We had ivf and icsi and my best blastocysts were from the icsi batch.

Have the clinic given you a rough idea of when you might be seen? Xx

[CC2018 in reply to Hidden]

Hi Hidden . Sorry it's taken me so long to reply. Felt like I needed a break. Apparently my fsh is a bit high at 10.4 but they then said it was nothing to worry about. The lady I spoke to last time just said she'd she's made a note this is the 2nd time I've called and said hopefully I will get in the 3rd time I call. I had a bit of a break down the other week as my dh's sister announced her 2nd pregnancy and last time I had seen her I told him I thought she was pregnant. My husband can't understand why I feel so distraught at others pregnancy and for me I think it's just the thought of why not Us? She already has one child who was born not long after our wedding and we have been trying since our honeymoon over 2 and half years ago so I guess i' m suffering with jealousy. You don't want to be jealous but after so much time you just can't help it and then you feel awful about yourself. Unexplained infertility is a vicious cycle.