A strange mixture of emotions

[Drives]

This weekend has been amazing but experienced such a strange mixture of emotions.

I met my 1 week old Niece for the first time 😍 obviously I'm super excited and completely in love already - shes gorgeous! It was a tough weekend though seeing my sister so happy whilst I was trying to keep my emotions in check. Does this get any easier??

It was the small things that hit me like a brick wall - seeing how happy my mum and dad were with their new granddaughter, the cards from my sister's friends and the look on my mum's face when she got some beautiful flowers from my sister. Then came the Facebook post announcing her birth. How strange that even though I had met her and had soooo many lovely cuddles it is the little things and social media posts that send me over the edge?! How random is that?

[Autumnmoon]

You can be proud that you were able to be happy for your sister but it is natural that you will be saddened that you do not have your own precious baby yet It's often the little things that catch us off guard try and do something nice that you can enjoy x

[Drives in reply to Autumnmoon]

Thank you 😉 you're so right....those little things really do take you off guard. Had a nice relaxing evening with my husband and now arranged to see my best friend at the weekend 😀

[DianeArnold Partner Nurse Fertility Network UK]

Hi Drives. It's called being "fragile"! I'm sure you have been a great support to your sister, who will in return be one to you. You've done so well to be able to meet your niece so soon, so maybe wait a little while before you see her again. Just be careful who you spend you time with for now and look after you. Hopefully you can have some investigations or even treatment to help you experience the same happiness. Thinking of you. Diane

[Drives in reply to DianeArnold]

Thank you Diane. That's really good advice and will definitely take that on board

[precioce]

I found that I could feel happiness for others and I wouldn't wish on them what me and my husband were going through, but i still felt sad too that we hadn't got our happy time. the small things i think always hit hardest as you prepare yourself for the big things.xx

[Drives in reply to precioce]

So true!! It really caught me off guard as thought I nailed it...then found myself crying in the shower 😢

[Asweetpea]

I think you did amazingly well going when she was only 1wk old. My sister is due to give birth the week after we do our test, 2dp5dt at the moment. I’m terrified. Sadly we have fallen out recently and she hasn’t been very supportive about what we’re going through. I am trying to keep a positive relationship going but things have definitely changed and we aren’t close anymore. I haven’t been a part of her pregnancy, her choice not mine. We have organised a date to go and see her after the birth but am dreading it. The fact you managed to get through it gives me hope that it will be ok. We seem to find the strength from somewhere when we most need it. I’m sure your sister will be so pleased you were there for her. And will hopefully understand how difficult it is for you. Sending you lots of love.

[Drives in reply to Asweetpea]

Thank you lovely 😘

I really hope your relationship with your sister can survive this bumpy journey. I'm sure you will need each other's support over the coming weeks and months. Keeping everything crossed for you!

Being an Auntie is absolutely amazing and any nerves I had before meeting her disappeared as soon as I saw her. She is beautiful! I took my dog with me and when I found it a little overwhelming I had a nice reason to escape for a little fresh air and headspace without causing a scene 😉

Sending lots of positive vibes and love your way x

[CBOO1]

Well done you 😊! It is so hard seeing other people have exactly what you want in this hell we all live in. I often find I dread seeing them beforehand, I can hold it together during & then I cry & cry on the way home & that’s the way it always is for me. I also find I can handle the actual baby better than the bump?? I don’t know if that’s just me? Except when my partner is given the baby to hold & I see him cradling them so perfectly, that’s like a kick in the stomach & the familiar lump in the throat returns. Anyway the point I’m waffling to get to, is that I think what you’re feeling is completely normal!

Sending you love & strength xxx

[Drives in reply to CBOO1]

Thank you 😘

I'm exactly the same (although I did have a little cry in the shower yesterday 🙈).

When my best friend was pregnant last year, meeting her baby was so much easier than seeing her pregnant and her growing bump. I found that soooo hard.

Thanks for sharing your experiences, it's not easy is it ☹ you've really helped me release some of the guilt I was feeling x

[precioce in reply to CBOO1]

Completely agree on the bump vs baby. xx