So yesterday was the end of my tww following being on Letrzole during my last cycle (after taking Norethisterone to start a bleed then with the idea that the Letrozle would induce ovulation because Clomid didn't work). Today I should have definitely either started my period or have a positive pregnancy test.. but I have neither!
The worse thing about it was yesterday I was soo happy because I was convinced I was going to get my period (due to pain/cramps ect). Dont get me wrong i was very sad that I hadn't got pregnant this time around but I thought at least my body was doing what it should be.
My partner is soo understanding normally (with my pain and things because of my endometriosis) but he just brushes trying for a baby off and when things don't work he says there will be next time (I know he means well he's trying not to show that he is heart broken to, because I'm the reason we can't have children not him, so I know he won't want to put any more stress on me) but I wish sometimes that he would say that it is sh*t and that it is unfair.
I'm sat here in tears before work thinking what have I actually done to deserve this and the fact that my body doesn't work when there are soo many people out there who take if for granted and don't deserve it!
Sorry if that sounds selfish but on days like today I can't help think WHY ME!?
Sorry for the rant/moan
Written by
JadeH92
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I'm so sorry holl92 I totally feel you. This is such a difficult journey. My hubby tries to stay soo strong but I know he's breaking inside. Being a man he's all, don't worry we will try again. You have to stay strong for each other. Have a bozy curl up in each other's arms and hold each other. Even in silence xxxxmassive hugs to you all xxx
Oh lovely big hugs 🤗 it was only the other day I was having a convo saying why do junkies and child abusers get kids and lovely ladies like the ones on here don't get a break it's 💔 the world mystifies me sometimes
I know what you mean regards your other half seriously hun I think it's the way their made up their made to be strong when we're going through tough times I know we want them to be like us but I sometimes think if they were we'd be worrying about them and our grief would be put on hold till eruption I erupt now because I'm not very good at talking about mine very good at putting one to paper but talking I just cry always have done when it's something ( close to my heart)
I hope your period shows up soon and I hope and pray your dream comes true very soon my love. We're all here for you hun, try have a good day at work if you want to chat after we're here, my inbox is always open
Oh Holl, so sorry you're feeling that bad. I felt the same way 3 weeks ago.
I was just fed up to keep trying without success... you need to realise that we have not done anything bad, this is purely unfair... please try and accept the situation. And also you need to be clear this is a very difficult think we are doing, yes, we are kind of warriors fighting to get pregnant.
In order to feel better, I started coming on that forum, plus I started seeing a therapist... and took some time for me.
I also know what you mean regarding your husband. Not easy, they don't feel the same way. Mine told me very nicely that even if we don't get any kids he will be very happy with me. Cute, but not what I wanted to hear at the time! They are not living the same way this experience. Of course this is difficult for them too.
So, yes this is very difficult, but you are strong and you can try again. Just prepare yourself mentally to be in the best conditions. Do not feel guilty! And we are all here to support each others as we lived similar things!
Sending you lots of positive energy and virtual hugs!
Thank you all for your replies. I didn't read them straight away kind of avoided this site and social media especially over mothers day! Honestly your kind words really helped and it's so nice to know that there is always someone to talk to! Sending my love and best wishes to you all and I'm here if anyone needs a chat happily repay the favour 😘
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Fed up - any advice?
Feeling seriously deflated and loss of hope 
Getting my hopes up
Game over- this time
Loosing hope
