Anyone just going through the motions?

[Faithful06]

So this year we had 1 fresh cycle transfer which resulted in a CP and then a FET which was BFN.

I have no Christmas spirit. I’m just going through the motions. Thinking about another fresh cycle next year I have no feelings about. Not happy nor sad just going through the motions. Anyone else feel like this?

[Saya85]

Hi faithful,

I can empathise somewhat.

I felt at one point that I was going through the motions with ivf or just doing it for hubby and that it wouldn’t work.

Thankfully we harvested a good few embryos and I was shocked at the good results. Sadly it did result in a BFN.

I now don’t know how to feel about the FET- should I be hopeful, should I be extra cautious. How much should I push the clinic. Etc do I really care enough to go through it? Am I being silly not to after the first hurdle.

Sometimes I feel an ambivalence /indifference to infertility. I almost just want it to hurry up and give me a final answer- will I get pregnant or not?!

I think the not knowing is what makes it so difficult. In some ways indifference might help you to not get so worried/stressed for the next cycle.

But maybe you could allow yourself a mental break this holidays and just completely switch off. MAybe regroup with your partner and recuperate without having to worry about ivf.

On another note if this is something you’ve been feeling for a while and isn’t just isolated to ivf I would also get your bloods tested in the meantime; Often a low mood /detached feeling could be as simple as vit D deficiency, and it often is!

Have your vit D, b12, ferritin, Folate and iron all tested and also try magnesium soak baths. And thyroid checked if you haven’t already. Sorting these out would not only help you to feel better but would increase your chances of a BFP as all are crucial to conceiving.

Hope your holidays end on a high 🙃

Xx

[Faithful06 in reply to Saya85]

Thanks Saya!!

I take Vitamin D all the time. I think there has been so much going on my life with work and a husband who’s been in the hospital I’m in a ‘I can’t be arsed’ mode. Maybe I need to stay there for a bit.

I hope your FET goes well. 🤞🤞🤞🤞

[Saya85 in reply to Faithful06]

Lol oh I can definitely empathise with that!

Maybe a spot of retail therapy tomorrow is what we need 😂

Good luck to you too

[E_05]

I’ve felt like this today to, it’s so hard to get festive when you’ve been through so much. Thinking of you xx

[Hidden]

Yep me too! Working has been a distraction but it's hard to keep painting on a smile.

Take care xx

[Faithful06 in reply to Hidden]

Work has played a part in this overwhelming feeling I guess. A few days break and hoping I snap out of this bit. Hope you are OK or getting there 😘😘

[Dunla]

I think at times you become sort of numb. I think it must be some kind of coping mechanism. Wishing you all the very best for 2018 whatever decision you make x

[Newqgirl1]

Yup, totally, feel like my life is in limbo. Future planning has all gone out the window, people ask will you be out for a birthday celebration, a weekend away, away for Easter! I have no clue, my life is on hold. I can’t imagine how people go through 7 or 8 cycles, my heads up my arse and I’ve only done one! We should be heading for round 2 Jan at some point after a fresh cycle with no viable embryos, I totally know what you mean about having no feelings about your coming cycle, almost afraid to be excited after such a let down last time!

[Faithful06 in reply to Newqgirl1]

My husband and I have been TTC on and off for 11yrs. We only started IVF this year due to some health issues. I’m tired. As you said life is on hold it sucks but if it produces that long awaited healthy baby then we have to do it. I’ve given myself a break from IVF for a bit will start again April/May time.

All the best to you Newq in your next cycle!!