Follow up appointment

[Aleelilook]

So we had the follow up and now the decision needs to be made..... she said after s long meeting with the senior embryologist, and analysing all of our previous cycles that it would appear my eggs are the problem, which we were prepared for. She did say though if we wanted to we could go for one more round, using the Long protocol and a low dosage of menapur, however she thinks even this would only give us a 5% chance with my eggs! My husband is keen to give it one last shot before egg donation, but I’m not sure I can take a 5th round of disappointment. Any suggestions welcome! Xx

[Hidden]

It’s a difficult one, we did 3 cycles using my own eggs and in this we had one bfp on our 2nd try but lost it about 6 weeks, we had very low chances but still did that 3rd cycle just so we could close that door and not have any regrets and then felt were ready to move on and have never looked back since xx

[Aleelilook in reply to Hidden]

Thats almost identical experience to our experience, except we had 4 before they realised it was definitely my eggs, I think the pregnancy threw them as it were. I’m wondering though one final hoorah as it were with my egglets! However I’m not sure emotionally I can take it, and the donor route gives me hope, and that’s exciting!! It’s so hard!! Xx

[Missy_22]

Hi difficult decision, personally I would go one more time but my friend used donar eggs in her second ivf and she has the most beautiful boy and she said I’m a Mum at 44 and carried him for 9 months she told me to always seriously think about it. Until I had seen them I was unsure but she has no regrets. She is doing another FET This month actually.

Good luck to you in your decision xxxx take care xxx

[Fredaflintstone]

It’s a hard one. When our chances were 2% we decided to go down the donor route but I’d not produced any eggs on highest dose of menopur. I just wanted to move on and towards a higher chance of success with donor eggs and took into account the waiting time for a donor match and the fact that it doesnt always work first time (our fresh cycle failed and our FET worked). We started the donor route in October 2017 and almost exactly a year later got our BFP.

I don’t regret moving on. I do sometimes think ‘what if’ about my own eggs but I also know if we’d not been successful this time it would have been a struggle to continue without a good break (and I’m already 42).

I think if you’re going to to try again it would need to be with a big dose of realism that it may not work to help manage the emotional side - you never know though you may be lucky and a take least you will definitely have no regrets about not trying again.

It’s a hard decision.

You could always join the donor register to start looking for a donor to shorten the waiting time if this round doesn’t prove to be a success.

I am sure you will choose what is right for you and i wish you all the luck in the world xxxx

[Aleelilook in reply to Fredaflintstone]

Thank you so much, I’m really thinking that I just can’t take anymore! I’m 34 and my eggs seem to hate me, so donor egg gives me hope, and that’s all I can ask for! Xxx

[Cinderella5]

It is a hard decision. We did 3 rounds with my eggs and hubby was was keen for donor eggs after round 2 so opposite camp to you guys. I wanted to persist a last go and agreed to switch after which we did. Once it came to it and after being given the 5% chat, even although we'd gotten 3 blastocysts I did at the beginning to struggle however once I learned from our DE cycle that we glad 6 brilliant quality blastocysts I knew we had made the right decision. Out first go hasn't worked but I'm ok with that, I wasn't under any illusion that it would. However still have 4 in the freezer and I don't see them as anything else but mine/ours! The way I see is the more bfns I have then the more defeated I will become so wanted to at least up the chances which we have, great deal and still have faith!xxx

[Aleelilook in reply to Cinderella5]

Yes it’s almost that hope it provides, where I don’t see much of that with my little egglets!! Thank you lovely, keeping my fingers crossed for your next round xxx

[Cinderella5 in reply to Aleelilook]

Exactly!! That hope means more than anything & we need that hope, it's what keeps us going!! Thank you!😚xx

[SnottyCow]

We had a similar decision to make recently. It all came down to money in the end. We’d spent so much already on an operation for my husband and 3 failed attempts with his sperm. We had one ampule left and they told us the problem was the sperm but we could try one last time if we wanted. We decided to cut our loses and go down the sperm donor route and now I’m pregnant with twins.

I know it’s a difficult choice but meeting people from ‘The Donor Network’ really helped us get our head around it. I know it’s different with egg donors because there’s more expense (unless you have a sister who might help you out).

Good luck x

[Aleelilook in reply to SnottyCow]

Sadly no women in my family! Just my dad and brother, so they are useless!! I looked at the donor network site and had a bit of a nose around! Xxx

[Newqgirl1]

No advice just wanted to say good luck, there is no right or wrong way but this must be a hard decision. I’m only at round 2 and already I’m struggling!

[Lizzielizzielizzie]

I know I’m a broken record on the, but have you guys had karotyping done? They thought my eggs were a problem but it turns out my husband has a chromosome translocation and that’s why our eggs dont develop. All his sperm checks had been fine. We were starting to discuss donor eggs but decided to pay for more tests and I glad we did as donor eggs wouldn’t solve our problems.

[Aleelilook in reply to Lizzielizzielizzie]

No we haven’t looked into that, I did ask my clinic if there were any extra tests we could do, but after analysing the four rounds their results was my eggs were not great, is this something that you did through your clinic? Xx

[Lizzielizzielizzie in reply to Aleelilook]

Yes. We insisted on tests for everything and spent £3000... I’m not advocating that but I think it’s just a few hundred for karotyping for both of you. They told us there was only a 2% chance that karotyping would be the problem, and it’s only 1 in 500 people that have a chromosome translocation like my husband, so it’s not massively likely but i always feel like I need to tell people our story!