3 BFN - I am feeling so sad

[emiraven62]

I had 3 BFN. I still can not believe it. I had all the symptoms. I took a home test one week before my period. It came out negative. Then when my period did not appear, I made another one. I was very excited. I swear I was 100 percent certain that it would be a BFP. Even my husband also thought about it. But it turns out to be a horrible BFN. I can not explain how terrible I felt.

My period did not appear after the second test. I had to turn to my mom and sisters. My older sister insisted on giving myself a blood test. When she had my first niece, she went through two BFN's until a blood test was done. I clung to that and went to a private lab.

Another damn BFN.

Now my period appeared five days after the last test.

I'm devastated. I feel horrible. I can not believe it. I think I have already lost count of how many BFN I have received so far. Why can things not happen just as they should happen? Having sex and having a baby? Is it not in that order in which it happens?

For worse situation, my mother-in-law heard about my BFN. Before she could say anything, I disconnected all the phones from the house and turned off mine and my husband's. I just want to lock myself in my room and cry while I watch Stranger things or some other shit. I try very hard to stay positive, but it is so difficult. I hate this.

[Hannah143]

Yes it’s just the fucking pits ! I’m so sorry to read your news. It’s heartbreaking and so unfair 😪💔. Take some time out to heel and rebuild your strength and you can work out your next move. Stay strong xx

[emiraven62 in reply to Hannah143]

Thank you. I feel a little better now that I've rested and cried enough. You're right, it's very unfair. I can only think of that pile of women who get pregnant on a night of drinking, and I feel so bad. I do not understand why it's so easy for others.

[jenny34]

I'm so so sorry to hear what you've been through. It's so so hard and you're being so strong. Put yourself first and if that means turning off all phones and watching tv then do it. Everything else can wait. Sending love xxxxx

[emiraven62 in reply to jenny34]

Thank you very much. I barely lit my phone again three days ago. I have not left home, I have only been going out to our garden to get fresh air. I feel a little nostalgic now. I think about whether we will ever be able to have a baby.

[jenny34 in reply to emiraven62]

Sending lots of love . It's such a difficult journey . Look after yourself xxx

[Leesara]

Oh Hun... it’s just so so so difficult isn’t it. Be kind and easy on yourself, take some time x

[Runner90]

Having a late period when you're ttc is so awful, I've had it happen a few times and done the same and gotten a blood test which was obviously negative after spending $$$$$ on at home tests.

It really sucks I hope you feel better

[emiraven62 in reply to Runner90]

Thank you. I will take into account the blood tests. I have always used home tests and they have served me a lot, but I have to admit that they are a pain in the ass. From now on I got blood tests. It is faster and with less uncertainty. Greetings.

[AllWeNeedIsluv]

I'm so sorry hun. It's really cruel this situation when you want something so bad and the body starts playing tricks on us. Your right to lock everything off have some you time and be good to yourself get your strength back and work out a next move. But for now just be good to yourself. Sending you big hugs 💗🤗😘

[emiraven62 in reply to AllWeNeedIsluv]

Thank you. It is awful. Sometimes I think that my body and I are not synchronized. It's the first time something like this happens to me. Before, I only had one BFN and then everything was still normal. I'm afraid this will become common. Greetings to you too.

[AllWeNeedIsluv in reply to emiraven62]

I hope it doesn't become common hun. I also hope you get the bfp you so deserve very soon. Bless you. Here if you need to chat. Xx

[E_05]

So sorry to read this, it really is so cruel. Take time to grieve and in time you will feel stronger again xx

[Sunshine09]

Thinking of you, sending big hugs xx❤️💋