Frozen embie didn't survive thaw 😒

Not posted for a while but have been reading lots of the posts and pleased there have been some positive updates from some. We had our transfer appointment for our only frozen embie on Tuesday but sadly it didn't survive the thaw, despite being a semi decent grade (3bb) we are both devastated and struggling currently. All was going really well and I responded well to the progynova so was all set. We knew there was a small chance (about 10 per cent) of it not surviving, but when we arrived they got us to gown up so we stupidly assumed all was good until we the embrologist came in with the news. They said if we had any questions we could ask them, but to be honest I just wanted to get out as I knew I was about to burst into tears. They called today and we've got a follow up appt next week, so thankfully not too long a wait. This was our last nhs attempt so if we try again will need to save up a huge amount of money which is a worry. Not sure what to ask at our follow up either, but husband is convinced both attempts failed as his sperm was obtained from a PESE operation earlier this year due to his diagnosis of azoospermia.

Just wondered if anyone gone through anything similar or has any advice on what to ask at our appointment next week ? Thank you x

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  • Aw my goodness lovely this is so sad 😒... it was one of my fears going through FET. Our hospital would always ring us 2 hours before the procedure to let us know if it had survived I hated that call ! Even with a 90% success rate we fear the worse. It's awful gowning you up though to take you through to tell you it had failed ! What an awful protocol !! My parter also had his sperm retrieved though Pese due to azoospermia, ours is CF related. The pathologist seemed happy with his sperm after retrieval and they select the best for ICSI ! It's highly unlikely your embryo didn't thaw because of sperm quality so please don't give up. His sperm was healthy enough to fertilise your egg ! It's seems like it's a lottery this whole IVF game and I think this time you've been really tragically unlucky :( perhaps take a break see what they say at your follow up appointment and then go from there. I'm sorry I can't give you words of comfort :( I can't imagine how you feel. Look after yourself and all the best ❀️❀️❀️

  • Thanks for your kind words. We said beforehand we'd rather be at hospital if it didn't thaw as didn't fancy finding out when driving across to hospital. They did tell us the sperm they retrieved looked good but he's convinced it's on him despite what I say! His azoospermia is also due to him being a carrier of CF so he is mising the vas defers. Thanks for your support and it's good to know there are others in same boat. Good luck with your FET and wishing you all the best xx

  • I’m so sorry to hear that this happened to your precious embie xx

  • Wouldn't you be entitled to another round if you didn't get to transfer stage? So sorry this happened it's all such a worry at every stage xxx

  • Hmm I'm not sure, just assume all over so definately something to ask next week thanks xx

  • So sorry about your frozen embryo πŸ™ I know Diane Arnold has a list of questions for various things, maybe you could send her a private message to ask for them? Xxx

  • Thank you, yes will email her xx

  • I'm so sorry. What an upsetting thing to go through. It's really poor they let you prepare for the transfer and then broke the news to you. I'm not surprised you just wanted to get out of there- you both must have felt shocked and gutted to the core. I'm glad you don't have a long wait for your appointment and hope you get the info you want from it. Big hug to you.

  • Just wanted to say I'm so sorry to read this :-( life really isn't fair sometimes and I would have wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible like you. I think it's really poor that they got you ready for transfer and then told you. Try and take some time out just for you and your husband and I know it's a cliche, but try to never lose hope. Look after yourself, lots of hugs xxx

  • So sorry to hear this. It's heart breaking and sounds very odd the way the clinic told you. I hope you get some answers at your follow up and that next time around you get your bfp. Big hugs xxx

  • So sorry about your little frozen embryo. It's so hard when you've built yourself up to that moment.

    Please don't give up hope and try to reassure your other half. My husband has CF and also had to have sperm retrieval via TESE due to missing vas deferens. We had ICSI and 6 embryos made it to day 5. We had one put back and we are so blessed to have our wonderful (nearly) 3 year old son.

    We are using one of our remaining 2 embryos to have a natural FET next month. We've had 3 failed FET's including 2 early miscarriages.

    Hoping you can take some positives from your appointment next week. Look after each other and maybe have a little break xxx

  • Thank you and that does give us hope that we could one day be blessed with a child of our own. We'll see what is said next week and take it from there. Sorry to hear you've had a few failed FETs as it's heartbreaking and good luck for your FET next month. Thank you xx

  • Thank you Lise. Take care xx

  • So sorry to hear that!! No advice, just wanted to say I'm thinking about you!!xx

  • No advice to offer as I've not been in your situation but I just wanted to say how sorry I am that it didn't work out this time. It must be so disappointing and upsetting for you both, but your husband mustn't blame himself. Hope you're both ok xx

  • Just wanted to say I'm sorry. It's good you have a follow up so quickly, I hope it goes ok... you will be In my thoughts oxo

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