Think the dream is over: So all was... - Fertility Network UK

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Think the dream is over

Mantaray75 profile image
22 Replies

So all was going well. Was even happy the nausea had kicked in this week. However, started brown spotting 3 days ago. HCG yesterday was 38,500 which is above the line on the curve for 6 weeks pregnant so good news.

Started bleeding last night, ironically whilst I was googling bleeding in pregnancy. Lots of period type cramps and passed couple clots. Seems to be settling this morning.

Clinic said they will scan me on Monday or Tuesday next week. Didn't give any other advice regarding bedrest etc but said to continue with progesterone and oestrogen. Had planned to go away to the mountains for a weekend so think we'll still go but I'll just take it easy. Better than sitting at home and thinking the worst.

Its funny, I never could quite believe I was pregnant.

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Mantaray75 profile image
Mantaray75
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22 Replies
Georgina78 profile image
Georgina78

Oh no I hope it was just a bit of a blip and everything is fine and there's no further bleeding Hun. Hope you have a lovely time and the time goes fast until your scan xx

Daisy-Mae profile image
Daisy-Mae

I'm so sorry to hear this and really, really hope all is well when you have your scan. Take care of yourself and I'll be hoping for the best for you xx

embiemomma profile image
embiemomma

☹ I really hope this is normal pregnancy bleeding for you... Good news about your HCG levels though. Worst advice ever, especially to a medically trained person! But just try to relax and not think the worst. You never know in this game! I have everything crossed for your scan next week, this feels close to home as we're at a similar stage. Best of luck x

Sam101 profile image
Sam101

Sorry to her about your stressful time. Hopefully you will get better as the day goes on. Try and take it easy and rest as much as possible. It wont be long til your scan. Im not gonna say try not to worry as i know how hard it is not to. I will keep everything crossed. Take care xx

Sunny_skies profile image
Sunny_skies

I really hope things turn out positively when you have your scan. I have read in this forum that many women bleed but go on to have healthy pregnancies. As everyone has said, try and keep calm and rest. Fingers crossed for you. Let us know how you get on. Xx

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5

Ive got my fingers crossed that everything is ok on Monday for you! Hopefully the fact its settling is a good sign! Try to enjoy your weekend in the mountains, take in the fresh air my lovely!x

Kernishp profile image
Kernishp

I had heavy bleeding at 7 weeks and was hospitalized. They couldn't find a heartbeat on an external scan and I remember thinking 'oh well, it was too good to be true' and all my pregnancy symptoms disappeared. My husband aged 20 years overnight and we both had a good cry together. However both our embies hung on in there and they are now 7 month old twin terrors! It doesn't always end badly, try to keep your mind busy if you can. Thinking of you. Xxx

MommaBear16 profile image
MommaBear16

Oh Mantaray - I'm so sorry to read this. I'm keeping everything crossed that this isn't the case and that this is just another hurdle for you before you get your scan. HCG levels are high which is a good sign, let's hope you have some good news for us after your weekend away. Stay strong lovely lady, this isn't over. Sending lots of love x x x

Mantaray75 profile image
Mantaray75

Thanks for all your kind words. Bleeding thankfully stopped last night but was pretty heavy for day. Back to feeling sick again so I've woken up and eaten a bag of maltesers. Off for my favourite lakeside walk this morning surrounded by snowy mountains.

Scan is Tuesday morning so everything crossed. My consultant rang me yesterday and seemed fairly positive.

x

Mantaray75 profile image
Mantaray75

Spoke too soon. Huge amounts of bleeding today whilst sat in cafe gazing at mountains. Passed massive clots in public toilet. Went to local hospital which was a bit pointless. They took bloods which don't get couriered to the lab in the nearest city until Monday! The doctor did an abdominal ultrasound which I knew was completely pointless and then did a speculum exam and took swabs for infection! She also did a urine sample, god knows why. It was all a bit of a farce really. I asked if my cervix was open and she said she thought it was a little bit. When she inserted the speculum she told me that she could see blood - no shit Sherlock! She also asked how I felt emotionally - what did she think I would say. At the end I told her I was a doctor which freaked her out even more.

Feeling kind of numb and weird now. My consultant rang me and was great. I said I will stay in the mountains for a few days cos don't wanna go home. She will come in especially on Friday to scan me but agreed that I was better off staying away rather than rushing back for a scan on Tuesday which wouldn't change things either way.

This whole process sucks from start to finish.

Georgina78 profile image
Georgina78 in reply to Mantaray75

Oh gosh mantaray so sorry to hear this, life is so so cruel sometimes, and what a crappy experience at the hospital for you. I really hope you'll be ok (in time) and sending big hugs. Sorry I can't say more, it does suck indeed xxx

MommaBear16 profile image
MommaBear16 in reply to Mantaray75

Mantaray I'm so sorry. This is all so very unfair, I wish there was something I could say to make it better. Just know that you have lots of people thinking of you and wishing you well. I'm glad you're not rushing home, take care of yourself. Lots of love x x x

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5 in reply to Mantaray75

Oh I'm so sorry to hear this! I can't imagine and won't even try....I just wanted to say I'm thinking of you!! After a heck of a journey.....sending you loads of hugs & look after yourself!!xx

Just to echo what others have said I'm so sorry to hear this. I know what you mean people say the most ridiculous things at times. I was yesterday having a blood test -for infertility investigations privately -and the person doing the test kept going on about her pregnancy ( yeah she knew our struggle to have a baby- 5 long years of ttc) I just muttered congratulations and she kept saying I'd be here soon having my scan ( I thought how the hell do you know I will?! ). Well meaning but thoughtless!

Good luck with the scan on Friday . Thinking of you X

Sunny_skies profile image
Sunny_skies

So sorry to hear this darling. You are a strong lady and I know you will get through this. Sorry about the experience at the hospital. We are all here if you need some support as sometimes it feels like people around do not fully understand. Lots of love. Xxx

Mantaray75 profile image
Mantaray75

Bleeding ongoing but not quite as heavy. Woke at 4am with bad period pains, by 6am it was excruciating so off we popped to the hospital again. The good thing was that the mountains looked amazing at that time of day.

By the time we got to hospital the pain was less which was fortunate because the doctor today just silently stared at me with a sad face. He prescribed 2 drugs which you shouldn't have in the first trimester and felt my tummy cos he felt he should. To be honest the dog curling up next to me in bed last night offered more symptom relief.

I stupidly have a faint glimmer of hope that all is ok. We've even thought that it could be twins and I've lost one. Even though we only had one embryo, my HCG levels were pretty high and my mum and my husband's dad were both twins.

Thanks to you guys for being my support. You're all amazing especially since I'm 18,000km from home. x

Daisy14 profile image
Daisy14

I am so sorry to hear you are going through this, it's cruel and unfair after such a long journey to get where you are.

Curl up and be completely selfish, take a little comfort from your husband and your beautiful surroundings. I don't really have any helpful advice but am thinking of you xx

embiemomma profile image
embiemomma

so sad to read this, but it's not over till it's over. Hang on to that positivity. Are you still having a scan Tuesday? Still keeping everything crossed for you... Please just remember there is nothing you can do to change the outcome so don't beat yourself up. Best of luck x

Mantaray75 profile image
Mantaray75 in reply to embiemomma

My consultant rang me yesterday and agreed that there was no point me rushing back home. I'll probably have a scan Friday as I'll be 7 weeks then so more chance of seeing things anyway. Part of me doesn't want the scan cos at least at the moment I can have some hope. I'm actually back to feeling quite nauseous again this evening but who knows what it all means. x

embiemomma profile image
embiemomma

you read so much about bleeding in early pregnancy, I think its more common than we realise! By no means does that put you at ease though! At least when you have your scan you will know for certain. Mine was at 6 weeks 3 days and the heartbeat was obvious so fingers crossed you get to see what you've wanted to so long. In the meantime, stay in that bubble!! Thinking about you x

Bumpwanted profile image
Bumpwanted

I had very heavy bleeding in my pregnancy at 8 weeks and then at 12 and I passed big clots but baby was fine. I didn't have any pain though.. Do you still have pregnancy symptoms ? If your hcg was that high surely you would not start bleeding until it had dropped significantly?? I really hope this is a positive outcome for you, the waiting and not knowing is sooooo hard, could u not find a private scan place near you and go for a scan? That's what we did instead of waiting as it always happened on a weekend, was well worth the money!! There will be somewhere I am sure near you ? X

Mantaray75 profile image
Mantaray75 in reply to Bumpwanted

I am currently in the mountains in rural NZ so not even any choice for a private scan. The ED in the hospital didn't have the facilities for a transvaginal scan and I'm now over an hours drive from them anyway. I could drive back home and have a scan at my clinic but I'm ok to wait.

I'm still feeling sick as if I'm pregnant. No pain now and some light bleeding continues.

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