Surrogacy for gay men: Hello everyone... - Fertility Network UK

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Surrogacy for gay men

michaelgorik profile image
29 Replies

Hello everyone! I am a gay man, not married but I have a boyfriend with whom I want to create a family. I always wanted to have kids. I don't know if it's right for me to write in this forum and ask for some advices... But.. is it even possible for a gay man to have a baby through surrogacy.?

I'll be glad to receive your replies.

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michaelgorik profile image
michaelgorik
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29 Replies
Mantaray75 profile image
Mantaray75

We're probably the wrong group of women to be asking as we're not very fertile! Good luck with your search. x

michaelgorik profile image
michaelgorik in reply toMantaray75

I know, I thought of that, but unfortunately there are only a few places where I can get some info and all of them are closed for the registration for the moment, I thought that there could be some women who have experienced the surrogacy abroad and know if in their clinics such an option is possible for gay men like me.

Anyways thanks for wishing me luck. xx

Lucyloo81 profile image
Lucyloo81

I have asked my friend who is in your position just waiting on a reply X

michaelgorik profile image
michaelgorik in reply toLucyloo81

Thank you! It'll be great to receive an advice!! You didn't have to ask your friend. xx

jhza700 profile image
jhza700

You could try posting your question on the " fertility friend " website. It's a much bigger site with many topics.

Hope that helps

Jx

michaelgorik profile image
michaelgorik in reply tojhza700

Thanks, unfortunqately for now it is really hard to get on the forum. I don't know why.. xx

Lucyloo81 profile image
Lucyloo81

My friend said he looked at a organisation called "COTS" good luck xx

michaelgorik profile image
michaelgorik in reply toLucyloo81

Thank you!

Lady_in_red profile image
Lady_in_red

Try youtube video search, you’ll find lots of stories about gay parenting including surrogacy. sure, it’s possible.

The question is how, where, how expensive, how long?

Also, how strong are your relationships as a family ‘ cos baby is not a toy, it’s a forever journey.

Are you ready for a challenge?

Hurricane profile image
Hurricane in reply toLady_in_red

I think if he asks for advice here and searches the way, he is most evidently sure in his decision.

michaelgorik profile image
michaelgorik in reply toLady_in_red

Of course I am ready! For the moment I try to find the options all over the world and opt for the surrogacy more than adoption, though I've considered both. I will look for some youtube videos and will try asking the couples there. Thanks.

I just do not know anything about how gay men experience such a thing and is it even common??

Lady_in_red profile image
Lady_in_red in reply tomichaelgorik

well, I don't know how 'common' it is. I just know that IT IS and you'll be not the first gay parents in the world. you just need to find answers to your questions on your own. adoption or surrogacy, it won't be quick or easy. perhaps, adoption will be even more complicated for you than surrogacy. You just need to make a profound research of possible options. If I'm not mistaken, you can apply for adoption in Columbia. They do approve gay and lesbian couples for adoption now, since 2015 if I'm not mistaken. Try contacting adoption agency and they will tell you for sure. But be ready it takes time. A lot of time. Are you ready to wait for years?

michaelgorik profile image
michaelgorik in reply toLady_in_red

I am not fond of adoption, i keep it as the last thing in the list. i want to have a kid with my own genes or genes of my partner, just to have our family tree grow. so.. thanks for advices you are really nice you help me believve in myself and in the success of everything. xoxo

Lady_in_red profile image
Lady_in_red in reply tomichaelgorik

I hope you'll find the way! We all deserve happiness and having families with kids. I'm so sorry you meet so much limitations on your way to parenting. still, there are a lot of good people in the world. i'm sure there are the ones that will help you

good luck, Michael

KimDerr profile image
KimDerr

hi, it's legal in some states of the US

michaelgorik profile image
michaelgorik in reply toKimDerr

Hi... If it's the only possibility for us I'll opt for it, but for now if we can find the international clinic (that is cheaper than US) it'd be awesome for sure. We are not rich and to afford the surrogacy in US I'd have to work for a years and economize on everything.. Maybe you know some reproduction centers that are open for people like me, in Europe?

michaelgorik profile image
michaelgorik

Hi! Thank you for advising me your clinic. Unfortunately I was told that in Ukraine the surrogacy is impossible for gay couples, I am a bit upset because there's been posts about that one ukrainian clinic that is really affordable and quick with surrogates search. I think maybe there is somewhere in the world a clinic with similar prices and services quality but open for everyone..

nicknick profile image
nicknick

I am not sure, probably Georgia, have a look at eggdonationfriends.com/treatment/ivf-for-same-sex-parents+surrogacy/ x

michaelgorik profile image
michaelgorik in reply tonicknick

Thank you, are they good with gays or..?

Hurricane profile image
Hurricane

Gosh, I also feel so much limited in my options as a single IP. this is so much unfair. The petition you mention, Rasteny, makes sense of course. But I'm not sure it'll change something in reality.

in any case, hope is all we have. let's keep searching!

KimDerr profile image
KimDerr

sure, things may change. it applies a lot of efforts, though. legislature can be changed, sure - easily. but what about ethics? many people won't ever understand it, unfortunately

Hurricane profile image
Hurricane

I was told that in some countries where surrogacy is legal (even in case they have restrictions to gays or singles) law is you know 'flexible' so that they can take even singles. is in Ukraine the same?

michaelgorik profile image
michaelgorik in reply toHurricane

I don't know about Ukraine, but unfortunately we will have to use another option, because we want to have a kid through surrogacy and it is completely forbidden for us over there. I don't know why, I have read about their contratcs that majority of women travel there for egg donor surrogacy and still it is not allowed for gey man. Sad. though I don't think that it is somehow possible to evade the law.. and i wouldn't want to do it by any means..

Hurricane profile image
Hurricane

I've met a posting on another forum of a man who is single and sterile and still he wants to have a baby via surrogacy. if even this is possible (seems hard to believe though) then you will definately find your own way. and I hope me too. ladies here suggest going to the USA where surrogacy is allowed even for singles and homosexuals, but it seems that the price of 150-200 k is unbearable for me

KimDerr profile image
KimDerr

single and sterile and strive for parenting? it will be tough if possible. what about genetic connection to the baby? I don't know how it works in the US but when our baby was born in Ukraine, there was a dna genetic test to prove parental relations between my dh and our sons. only after positive test they gave us all documents and we could travel back home with babies. i think for the one who is single and sterile newborn adoption is obviously the best option. imo.

BabyD profile image
BabyD

Hi, yes you can do surrogacy but I believe it's around £15,000 xx

Hurricane profile image
Hurricane

I faced this problem. In Ukraine and Georgia, surrogacy law discriminates singles and LGBT couples. They don't have any age restrictions like in Greece for example (up to 50 y o). I like what they offer and I would even pay to start the program but they won't ever approve me as a single mom

Littlebo profile image
Littlebo

Its a shame as i Would be willing to share my eggs and womb in exchange for funding the fertility clinic fees and drugs!!!

Blooo33 profile image
Blooo33

I think you have no reasons to be upset. The field of reproductology has a lot of offers.

Don’t know about all countries but for sure in US you can use this chance as even single men used. For example Cristiano Ronaldo ( famous Portugal footballer) has a baby-boy from surrogate.

There are precedents when men changed a gender had married another man and they were able to pass such programs in eastern Europe where we can find extremely cheaper options.

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