Fertility Network UK
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Giving myself a hard time

I'm about half a stone off having my bmi under 30 which is nhs requirements for IVF , I've already lost a stone. I've been eating healthy and running ( managed to get myself up to 60 min runs) which I've been really enjoying the challenge.

But last time I seen the consultant he was really harsh on my weight and said I needed to loose immediately! ( I'm currently waiting for tube removal op).

I've just turned 35 on Friday and I know feel really flat and useless :-( my " plan" was always I'd have kids by now! Never took into account that I'd need IVF ....... I really hate myself for been over weight and wish it was as easy to loose weight as it is to put it back on

Help I'm lost in a hole of darkness and I just want to loose lbs so I can stick 2 fingers up at the doctors (.not literally)

13 Replies

Oh sweetheart I sooooo feel your pain!! I was in exactly the same position as you. Saw the consultant in the October to be told my eggs were depleting faster than my age, left hook and then the right upper cut was to be able to get the nhs funding I had to lose 2.5 stone before my 40th birthday which was in the April!! Mortified didn't even come close. The last half a stone drove me up the wall but my fertility nurse suggested the British heart foundation diet which you do for 3 days and can lose upto 10lb. It works!! However it's not pleasant or easy but as you know when your desperate for something you'll try anything!! Xx

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Thank you, well done loosing your weight . I think the trouble is especially with weight you feel like your the only one and so judged especially when they put me in the obese categorie due to Bmi ..... I'm only s size 14 so certainly not what I though of obese .

I will defiantly research the British heart foundation diet any thing Is worth a go at the moment


Hi crazy_cat . When I had my first cycle in March on NHS 6 days before my date start they call me saying that I'm 2kg over my BMI . They say if I don't loose it they going to move my cycle for next month😔 I told them that I'm going to loose....and In that moment I drop everything I was doing ....I haven't even touched my favourite Cottage Pie I was cooking for the evening.... I wear my sporty clothes and went for run 2h keep repeating " no one no one will cancel on me".... After that I was just one more for total toning classes .... When I went to the clinic for weigh

I lost 3kg 😃😃😃 Dont let anyone to cancel on u Hun 💪🏻💪🏻😃

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I completely understand why you guys went for these crash diets, I would do the same if I was under the same pressure.

It just makes me sad that they put that pressure on you. The ironic thing is this is the NHS promoting unhealthy approaches to weight loss!

Bloody ridiculous.

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Awww thanks hun. Bloody hell size 14 and your in the obese category!! The shocking thing is babe the nhs are the only body that still do things on the basis of BMI. I had a full on row with the bloke about it at the gym I joined. Nothing worse than being patronised by a boy of which you have underwear that is older than him!!! It was all worth it tho as I'm now 30+3 weeks pregnant. Yay xxx

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Thank you every one, it's so bad that they can make us dance the way they do over weight :-( I know everything has to have a cut off but seriously there must be common sense used as well.

I'm sure I can remember some Olympic athlete causing all hell over bMI as she was classed as obese but was all muscle.

My husband has just pushede to the gym and I'm feeling better after running 70 mins :-)

They certainly won't beat me down I'm gonna do this!

Love to you all and good luck x

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Well done! I bet you feel better after that run too. Keep going! :-)

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I'm so sorry you had to deal with that Crazy_cat. Your consultant should pull his bloody head in. 'Lose immediately', if he really said something like that then he is an idiot. It's not like you don't know what the stakes are, you're living it, not him, and you're trying your best. He doesn't have the right to lecture you like a dumb kid. You're well within your rights to give him two fingers (literally), and an earful while you're at it.

I've been on an eating healthy and improve my fitness plan since June last year, and have lost 3 stone so far, dropped under 30 BMI a few weeks ago (finally!). It's not easy, and takes longer for us woman as we naturally have less muscle mass/burn less calories. My husband has been on the same plan and lost a stone more than me, the shit :-)

A few months ago the weight stopped coming off even though I was doing all the right things. For six weeks it just wouldn't budge, and I had to mix things up by adding more strength training in plus more protein in my diet, and now it's coming off again. You don't have complete control over your weight loss, it's not like waving a magic wand and saying 'lose immediately!'. Geez.

You're doing your best and doing a great job. Keep it up and you'll be under that 30 BMI in no time.



I didn't do any extremely diet . I eat 5 times a day . I only went one for run and once for classes in those first 6 days when clinic told me to loose 2kg and I did lost 3kg. 😃 One of my previous posts I put the diet plan I done .Is good special if u don't have many time to go and exercise . How a look girls ...lots of things to choose from 😃😃

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Thanks Olivia I will have a look at your previous posts to see diet x


Thanks pollypanda and well done you loosing 3 stone that's really good. Me and my husband have a competition how far we can run all in good humour as I'm beating him at the moment lol.

The first nurse was really understanding we seen and was lovely which makes it more of a shame that u still have arrogant consultants that aren't as fit as a fiddle them selfs! I really wanted to say to him what's your BMI work out at lol .

I'm sure I will get there I'm determined, blood sweat and tears I'm sure along the way !


Hi again Crazy_cat . I look on my previous posts and I cannot find the plan diet but I'm going to send u now . Good luck Hun 😃GVF plan

Phase 1 ( month 1 )

To gain control of food

To stop cravings

To increase energy levels

To become aware of food as fuel

To boost the metabolism

To build new habits around lifestyle

To burn bodyfat

To boost immune system

To get in the zone

We are going to be eating little and often.. 5-6 times a day

This is to be done by introducing the GVF principles including greens and protein only after 4pm and whole grains during the day.. Eating little and often.


G is for grains

V is for vegetables

F is for fruit

P is for protein

L is for leafy greens

A is for Almond milk

N is for nuts

These make up the basis for the eating plan, with a few rules thrown in

Rule #1

No fruit or grains after 4pm

Rule #2

Eat little and often ( every 3-4 hours )

Rule #3

Always eat breakfast

Rule #4

Cut alcohol down substantially during the week

Rule #5

Go to bed hungry

Rule #6

Drink 1.5 litres of water per day

So we have the food groups and we have the rules, next is the plan


The plan is based on eating little and often every day, speeding up your metabolism and helping you to burn not only all the calories you consume, but stored calories too ( bodyfat )

skipping meals, dieting and over eating lead to the same thing.. Long term weight gain.

Why?? Because it stresses the body leading to the production of cortisol ( the stress hormone )

What is cortisol exactly??

The endocrine system plays a part in where we lay down fat and the two hormones that determine how much and where you will lay down bodyfat are insulin and cortisol. By management of these two hormones you can limit the amount of bodyfat you lay down around your stomach area. In one respect cortisol is a vital hormone because it helps regulate the metabolism of fat, protein and carbohydrates. Cortisol however is also responsible for telling your body to store fat, for increasing your appetite and for despositing fat around your middle.

Cortisol is a stress hormone that can be traced back to our evolutionary response to danger. When your brain thinks that your life is under threat it stimulates the adrenal glands to release the hormones adrenaline and cortisol. Adrenaline helps you become alert and focused and the cortisol increases levels of fats and sugar in the bloodstream to fuel your physical response. Our busy modern lifestyles and long work hours with little rest has resulted in us becoming stressed and this often results in a constant low-grade release of cortisol. Stress comes in many different forms and cortisol can be produced by emotional and dietary stress resulting from poor eating habits, lack of sleep, excessive intake of alcohol and stimulants such as caffeine, sugar and tobacco.

When we produce excess cortisol we end up with a surplus of fat and sugar in the bloodstream, we then produce insulin in response to the increased sugar in the bloodstream. Insulin is responsible for sending sugar to fuel the brain, stowing sugar into cells and helping decrease blood sugar levels. Fat cannot be stored in cells without the presence of insulin. The reason why fat targets your middle is because it is close to your liver where it can be quickly converted to energy if needed. Abdominal fat cells also have four times more receptor cells for cortisol then anywhere else in the body so you are naturally programmed to lay down any excess fat here.

When the body is consistently producing too much cortisol and insulin then the cells begin to respond less effectively to insulin, the result is consistently high blood sugar levels. This is known as insulin resistance and is the first step towards developing type 2 diabetes. Stress leads to high levels of cortisol, high levels of cortisol lead to insulin resistance and insulin resistance can lead to diabetes and heart disease. If you hold fat around the middle then you have a higher chance of becoming insulin resistant and should take the necessary dietary and lifestyle measures to lose that fat.


Now here is the good news.. That stubborn fat that you hate so much, can be burned, and even better news.. It's not by dieting of over exercising , its by being smart with what you eat and when you eat, and it's my job to take you on the journey of changing a few things in your lifestyle that is keeping you where you are right now !

What should your day look like?

The breakdown of your eating is 6 small meals spread throughout the day


Mid morning snack


Mid afternoon snack


Evening snack

Remember no sugars or whole grains after 4 pm

So dinner consists of protein and greens or veg ONLY

Take time to read this again and then fb inbox me with any questions


A. Porridge with almond milk or water - add small amount of honey if needed

B. poached eggs x 2 on Wholemeal toast or half a bagel ( no spread )

C. Fruit smoothie

D. Fruit salad and small amount of natural yogurt

E. carrot juice and ginger

F. Protein shake

G. Piece of fruit

H. Boiled egg x 2 with Wholemeal toast ( no spread )

I. Salmon and small amount of cream cheese - add half a Wholemeal bagel ( no spread )

J. 2 x raw eggs ( drink neat )

K. Beans on Wholemeal ( no spread )

L. 2 eggs omelette

M. Grilled lean bacon and poached egg - add Wholemeal toast or half bagel ( no spread )

N. Mushrooms, tomato, grilled bacon x 1

O. Rolled oats with natural yogurt- add small amount of honey or berries

P. Quinoa porridge with water or almond milk

Q. Kiwi with natural yogurt

R. Handful of almonds and cashews

S. half a grapefruit, Wholemeal toast ( no spread ) and a boiled egg

T. Half a Wholemeal bagel or toast with organic jam

U. Parma ham and melon


Hi Crazy Cat! Pat yourself on the back for losing the stone and keep doing what you're doing! The consultant's bed side manner leaves a lot to be desired. Don't let some silly man put you off! Running for 60 mins is not to be sniffed at and the consultant probably couldn't do that himself! Lol! Congratulating you for your weight loss to date and encouraging you to loose the extra half stone would have been much more productive! Take care and best of luck x x x

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