Fertility Network UK
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Wife said she no longer wants to try

My wife has given up trying a babe- that blew up my hopes of being a dad, I can not force her to do anything - like eating more healthier, exercises! been trying for 18 years, 3 failed Iscis/ivf, tried natural herbs, now someone a nutritionist who is helping many by changing diets has offered us to try her free recipes, but my wife said she can not go through the emotions of expecting to be pregnant yet nothing happens.i am completely opposite - I want to try Than to just do nothing- Hopeless

5 Replies

I'm so sorry to hear this. Do you think some counselling might help both you and your wife? I hope you both feel better soon.


This is a tricky one! Obviously I can understand both point of view especially after 18 years. How old are you both? Could you give her a few months of no baby talk and then ask her again? Have you been to counselling?


I'm sorry to hear this. I can understand your wife feeling like she can't continue but it's very difficult if you don't feel the same. I agree with Casbah - it sounds like your wife needs a rest (maybe a holiday) and counselling would also be good. I know my own counsellor suggested we put a limit on how long we're prepared to try for before we consider stopping and/or looking at other options. Best wishes x


I agree with what everyone is saying. This is obviously a difficult situation and a rest from thinking about pregnancy and cycles might be needed. I also think counselling would be a good idea. I wish you both the best of luck x


Hi may I ask the reason for your infertility and how old you both are?

We are only 30 & 35 but I have blocked fallopian tubes and Endometriosis everywhere and due to my Endo my egg count AMH is very low. Egg quality is bad as well. Just been through a failed IVF and got told to use egg donor next time. There are no donors where we live and we need IVF to get pregnant due to blocked tubes! So we have only been trying for 3 years but it looks like this could be the end of the road for us.

Especially as we can not afford to pay for donor eggs & IVF ourselves.

Of course I can understand both of you..

Maybe you could agree on a time where you both are willing to stop?

Does your wife have Endometriosis? I have been in a lot of pain for several years whilst we tried for a baby and can understand if your wife would struggle with this.

I wish you all the best.


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