Really Really Fed Up Now!

[mythyroidlife]

Hey everyone.

I hope you are all doing well.

I’m really sorry for the negative post, I am usually a happy guy who is always positive but today is not a good day.

Let me take you back.

Me and my wife have been unable to have children after trying for around 2 years.

We was told we could get one shot of ivf on the nhs.

So we do all the blood stuff and my wife had a internal scan to make sure her tubes were ok and not blocked.

Well the results come back and her hormone levels (forgive me I am not a doctor) are too low and they “think” her left tube “could be blocked”

But they would have to do a small operation to check.

Her operation was all booked in and my wife was happy as she felt we are finally getting somewhere. A operation and some tablets to get her levels right and we was both sure that would be enough to fall pregnant naturally.

5 days before the operation they cancelled because of corona.

Fast forward to today. And this is the rant.

They are still not doing operations. I live down in the south and our corona infection rate is very low and it was reported in the local newspaper that they had 0 cases in the hospitals. And yet they are not doing non urgent operations.

I did lose my temper and I would use my life savings to let her go private, nope they are not doing even private operations.

Now I know people have been suffering and I don’t want to come across as a child who throws his toys out the pram but I feel like we have suffered for long enough, I just want to make progress in our lives.

We are desperate to have children of our own. I can see my wife getting upset when she sees people with baby’s and always says “I hope that could be us”

As a guy who never wants to see his wife upset, I find it really really hard. All I want to do is make her happy and of course myself.

So I emailed the hospital and asked when do you think they will do operations. And I was told it will be a very long time yet.

I am so lost .I have no idea what to do, and no where to turn.

I said to my wife that I would just go private for IVF. “Fuck it”, I would be willing to cripple myself with debt.

Guess what?

They won’t proceed with ivf without having the operation.

Honestly I am so fed up with life right now.

I have lost all hope. Will I have a child of my own... probably not.

[FrancyItaly]

I think you need to have a consultation with a good private IVF clinic and get a second opinion and further investigations. If a tube is blocked you can still conceive naturally, I know people who did. Also, with IVF, if you don’t have underlying conditions, there is a good chance to get pregnant.

I know how hard this process is and the wait is the worst part. This is why during the lockdown I decided to go privately.

[mythyroidlife in reply to FrancyItaly]

Thank you so much.

I will call our private clinic and see what they say.

[Alwaysbelieving]

Really sorry to hear your awful situation it’s so frustrating being stuck between a rock and a hard place. When I was having tests etc in the early stages the doctor said he wouldn’t even check if I had blocked tubes because it was quite invasive and it wouldn’t change the outcome - I would need IVF regardless. This was because I ovulate each month and regular cycles etc. Not sure if that’s helpful in anyway but for all I know I could have blocked tubes and it has been bypassed to IVF anyway! Hope you can move forward soon and everyone else currently waiting.

[Rain415]

I'm sorry to hear this, it struck a chord with me as I have had the exact same rant a lot over the last few weeks. My husband was waiting on surgery (hopefully help his fertility) and it was cancelled in Feb due to 'not having specialist equipment' - then Covid happened and we have heard nothing. We rang last week and was told ring back in few weeks. We have been trying for two years. I found it the hardest when we don't know what is happening, when the surgery was booked at least we had something in place to move forward. All of your frustration is completely justified, I'm hoping you hear something soon!

[mythyroidlife in reply to Rain415]

Thank you. I am sorry to hear about your situation.

I just don’t understand how they can leave people I’m limbo.

[Hidden]

Hello. I am sorry to read this. I get frustrated because I feel that I have no control; other people get to decide when they want a baby but I have to wait for a group of people to decide for me. It is frustrating.

I hope it works out for you and your wife, I really do.

Don’t forget it’s okay to rant and feel bad, you have to work through it I find.

[Ranchu90]

If you cannot find anyone to do it private in UK, try abroad. Have you ever took this into consideration? There things are moving much more quicker than here, plus is much more cheaper. Have a thought.

I wish you the best 🤗

[LisaHarada]

I agree with Ranchu, I did both my IVFs in France, and though I did not get pregnant I found out recently that they are open again and I will be trying for my 3rd round. Just another option to spare you from the agony..

[Hidden]

Im so sorry to hear this. But from what i have seen on open evenings and info sessions, even if both her tubes are blocked, ivf will be the only option anyway. So the private clinics should be able to help you. Also consider going abroad? Combine a vacation with ivf? Please dont give up !!

[mythyroidlife in reply to Hidden]

Thank you so much. The support is amazing on this group.

I have decided to go down the private route and get a second opinion..

while a holiday does sound good I won’t be able to take one till later next year 😂

I feel so much better today