Husband passed away and I'm numb

[Soon2bmrsw]

Hi all, so my husband and my rock died from a brain haemorrhage on the 30th August. I am completely numb, I have obviously cried but I don't know, I feel like I should be on my knees crying my heart out or angry at something but I'm just not. I love this man with every fiber of my being and knowing I'll never see him again. Yet I feel nothing.Is this normal? He's the one who's looked after me after surgery and who got me chocolate or a hot water bottle during flare ups, who I woke up to every day and went to bed with every night, who accepted that I wouldnt be able to give him a child with no arguments and who saw me at my lowest when my specialist told me a hysterectomy was now my only option yet I feel nothing. No sadness, no pain, no anger, no happiness just nothing

[Endosufferer1]

It's completely normal the time for you to process the loss. Now, make sure that all administrative things are being done! We all go through the same feelings you know. Please, make sure to rest (holidays...) once you've finished all the things that must be done right now!!!

[butterfliez]

I am so very sorry for your loss . In times of trauma we go into shock & our brains try to protect us from all the upset , feelings of numbness are very common , the shock of all what has happened can last a while. there is no right or wrong way in which you grieve , grief also comes in waves. I hope you have support around you .

Take care

Sending you strength xx

[Poppy16]

I am so sorry and saddened to hear about your husband's sudden passing. You are very much in my thoughts and prayers. I trust you are getting support from your family and friends. Perhaps reach out to your GP for NHS grief counselling or contact CRUSE Bereavement Care. Don't grieve alone. There is lots of support out there. I feel for you. Sometimes it helps to write down your feelings in a diary type format. Can provide a sense of release from all the numbness/shock and maybe help you process what has happened to you. Sending you caring thoughts and a virtual hug. X

[Prettythings1]

I am so sorry for your loss

Grief is weird it effects everyone differently so please do not beat yourself up

Its early days for you, you will be in shock still

Take one day at a time sending hugs xx

[GreenViolin]

What a huge shock for you. Grief comes in so many forms, so please don't compare yourself with what you think you should be feeling. Give yourself permission to feel the way that you do. You might find that strong emotions follow over time. As Poppy says, do get support from professionals if you feel you need it. I would agree that writing down what you are or aren't feeling can be therapeutic, as this can help you tap into emotion that is maybe not showing on the surface. Sending my heartfelt sympathies to you.

[Char411]

I am so so sorry to hear this. It sounds like you are in shock and your brain hasn’t fully processed the sudden death and it’s only been just over a week. I hope you have a good support network and be sure to reach out to them and maybe some bereavement counselling in time. My friends mum died a very sudden death last year and she was also numb for a period of time and although she knew she had died she couldn’t actually process that she wasn’t coming back.

You’re in our thoughts xxx

[AllthatGlitters]

I’m so sorry for your loss x

Sending hugs and strength to you x

[Lovepenguins]

I am so so sorry to hear what youre going through. Your husband sounded amazing and supportive. Xxx

[MrsPaddingtonBear]

Hello

Firstly I’m sorry for your loss. I too was widowed so I know what you’re going through. Secondly, there is no rule book for grief. No right or wrong way to feel or act, NOTHING. I was told by a bereavement counsellor that everything you feel is perfectly normal until a gp or other medical person tells you otherwise. The first few weeks and the first year are the strangest and the learning to adjust stage. Please be assured you are not doing anything wrong. There are many practical things to attend to in the early days that blur everything else out in a way even though we are aware why we’re doing these things ( if that makes sense) Be gentle with yourself do whatever feels right to YOU, be firm if you need space, do this your way. Take care.

[BloomingMarvellous]

Shock and denial ( somewhere in the deep subconscious). Never underestimate grief and it’s wild ways.

[K2023]

Deepest condolences, so sorry to read of your loss .. xx

[pain2001]

Actually, emotional numbness is super common when it comes to such traumatic events. What my therapist taught me is that your psyche knows it can't take the amount of grief you are supposed to be feeling, so it just goes numb. It's one of nature's best coping mechanisms, but I know how debilitating the guilt can feel. You will probably start getting in touch with your emotions (good and ugly) once you ar eover the shock. Definitely talk to a GP or counsellor if thigns get worse.

[Pennyheart1]

I am so so sorry for your loss. Your husband sounds like he was an amazing bestie. Hope and pray that you have close people around you to walk you through this time in the way that you need little by little Xx ❤️

[aniez]

I am so sorry for your loss.. grief is processed differently.. anything is normal; and everything will be ok.. give yourself all the time needed.. things have a way of sorting themselves out and settling down. My suggestion: don't push yourself, don't add any pressure or judgement, just, be.Sending good vibes, love and prayers!