Severe severe pain...where the heck do i go from here?

[Poorna66]

Hey all, sorry this is just a rant, Its one of my very high pain days and i am at the end of my tether. I try so hard to time my painkillers right so that i can at least maintain it at a pain level of 6 or 7 but somedays it just doesn't work out. Today is a 10/10 and i feel like my life is not worth living.

I am in india, the government healthcare here is next to nothing. I have already spent so much money on private specialists undergoing laproscopies, aspirations, ivfs, lupron shots, pills, accupuncture and what not. I have tried the endo diet, self massage, supplements, yoga, exercise...nothing helps much. I try so hard to hold on to hope but really, what else can i try now? Financially, we cannot afford to keep spending all our savings on pointless surgeries. It is really hard to find excision specialists in india. I don't have children, and i still have some hope so i dont want a hysterectomy although i am 36 this month and hope is fading fast.

I feel like i have no hope left, i have spent the last one hour hugging a really hot heatpad to my stomach and crying in misery. I know this will pass, and once i feel a bit better i wont feel the same but right now it is really really hard to convince myself that there is any point in living like this. Sorry for being such a downer, i just needed to vent. Hope others are having a better day than mine.

[brizzlebird]

Oh Poorni I am so sorry to hear you feel like this. I was just thinking the other day that I hadn't seen you on here for a while and was going to message you. You are right and know It will pass. Please be kind to yourself whilst you feel so dreadful. You are not alone x

[Poorna66 in reply to brizzlebird]

Thank you sweetie. Your message brought tears to my eyes. Sometimes when you are feeling so down, a kind word is all you need. Thank you

[brizzlebird in reply to Poorna66]

I am sorry that is all I can offer. But you have got this, you are stronger than you think, we all are x