Didn't receive the news I wanted to hear... - Endometriosis UK

Endometriosis UK

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Didn't receive the news I wanted to hear last week!!

shelly144 profile image
10 Replies

Hi there, I am 23 and have being dealing with endo since I was 18! I have had 2 ops an tried a range of other treatment. Last week i attend my consultant an she infomed me that I am not fit to try for a baby as I have 3 conic dieases which I need to get sorted first, bladder, bowl an endo and having a baby will not help my problems. Then I have my husband that doesn't really understand why nearly every day I am not in good form because I am in pain an just feel life is not worth living! Then at the weekend just found out my sister in law is pregnant! Has anyone else been informed this info or have any words of advice which would help to pick up my spirt. Just feel so depressed and always let down!

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shelly144 profile image
shelly144
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10 Replies
Miwa profile image
Miwa

Hello

I too was symptoms from 18 and was diagnosed at 21. I know how scary and awful it must feel for you right now. I too also have endo on my bowel and bladder and I also have Gilbert's disease of the liver. I am so sorry to hear you are depressed as I am there too at this stage of my life also and I know how it can cloud your thoughts. But mine is post natal depression as I have a 10 month old daughter. It is possible to be "ill" and conceive, carry a pregnancy and give birth.

Go with what feels right to you. Only you know if you and your body are ready to try for a child. Nobody else can tell you that. Endo is never going to go away anyway.

It must be awful and devastating for you to see your sister in law pregnant. I work with pregnant and post natal women and I just wanted to cry every day seeing everyone else getting pregnant but me.

It must be awful that your partner doesn't understand what we go through on a daily basis, just to sometimes be able to get through the day. I think it is hard for anyone else to imagine what a hidden disease must be like to live with, especially one that most other people don't even understand.

I hope my words help in some way

Miwa xxx

shelly144 profile image
shelly144 in reply to Miwa

Thank you miaw for your kind thoughts.

I have been suffering really bad the last 2months with the endo, ibs, bladder issues it's just getting me down so much that I am thinking life is not worth living. So hard especially wen you only get little sleep.

Sorry to hear that you are suffering postnatal depression must be hard on you, I know I always said if I get pregnant I don't want a girl as I don't want her to suffer what I am suffering. Husband keeps saying don't be like that as he thinks postnatal depression could develop if I did conceive a girl. It's just so hard on us sufferers.

Yeah your right it's hard for people to understand what we suffer, support classes or something might help them understand it better!

Hope you have a nice Xmas break!

Really nice to hear from you an your kind thoughts.

Many Thanks, Shelly xx

Miwa profile image
Miwa in reply to shelly144

You must get some help from someone if you are thinking that life is not worth living. If you can go and see your GP who should put you in touch with a counsellor or some other support team. There is support out there to help you get through this, and you don't have to go through it on your own. Please please do contact your GP. I was scared to contact anyone and thought I could get through it on my own, but it was the best thing i did when I finally admitted to my GP i was depressed, as I was given help really quickly and I am starting to be on the up again. I don't think i could have done it without help from professionals. Please please get some help.

Here is a good link for partners about endometriosis.

informedhealthonline.org/my...

I hope you have a good christmas, but please think about trying to get some help. I know it is not easy, but just talking to someone about how you feel can really really help. Even though it does not change your circumstances.

Love

Adele xxx

shelly144 profile image
shelly144 in reply to Miwa

Hi Adele, thanks for your kind thoughts again. My local GP is useless they are no support what so ever. But I will speak to someone soon as I am really depressed. Husband tried to be understanding but he doesn't right know what we r suffering, feeling or going through.

Thanks again, happy Xmas and happy new year.

keep in touch!

Michelle xx

Miwa profile image
Miwa in reply to shelly144

I have been using Headspace which is a web based mindfulness programme which my counsellor suggested. It guides you through it and you can try 10 days for free to see if you like it. It has really helped me. This may help in the meantime until you can find some support.

headspace.com

I had my endo removed from my bladder and my bowel, which it had grown inside and around my ovaries etc. I followed this with IVF and I became pregnant. So no matter how bad the endo may seem, it does happen and women do get pregnant when all the odds seem stacked against us.

Let me know how you get on.

Adele xx

shelly144 profile image
shelly144 in reply to Miwa

Hi Adele, thanks again for the information. I will try it an let you know how I get on. Thanks fir all your support.

Michelle xx

endopains profile image
endopains

Not to be rude what are your chronic conditions? I can't see these interfering with concieving but may make pregnancy more hard work for you, which might be what she meant. Is this where your endo is? If you're habing bladder problems such as regular/constant infections and cystitis take a probiotic tablet everyday and this just stops it! I use probio available at Holland & Barrett and Boots and it was a miracle. I have bowel issues they have tried to blame on everything but it is my endo. From what you've said I can't see an issue in you falling pregnant but I don't know the full story. And depending on what they are it might be better for you to tackle them first. I know what it feels like in your position. It's awful and you want to scream and all he wants to do is help you. Get your consultant to be more constructive and lay out the plan/list of treatments. It will be your turn :) best wishes xxx

shelly144 profile image
shelly144 in reply to endopains

Hi there, all my organs were stuck together with endo, it was growing around ovaries etc. I have bladder issue a, sever ibs and then endo. Endo was growing on bladder an bowl also.

I am trying all different types of herbal stuff an probiotic tablets as lactose intolerant. Consultant has asked me to try this type of sugar which flushes the urinary tract so waiting it to arrive by post.

Thanks for your words of wisdom. Xx

endopains profile image
endopains in reply to shelly144

Have you had surgery to remove it? Straight after surgery is your most fertile time :) have it removed and you can start trying. I reckon you will have a baby in your arms 2015 or 2016. And not just your niece/nephew xxx

shelly144 profile image
shelly144 in reply to endopains

Aww... Thanks! Yeah got endo removed for second time in January 2014. Fingers crossed by 2016 I'll have my own wee angle. Xx

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