how can i live with Plagiocephaly? plz anyone

[SupremoX11]

i'm a 17 years old male with plagiocephaly and it's mild to moderate i don't know what to do on my life i don't want to step out of my house i feel so depression i just don't want to live anymore i am so tried about it i just want to rest and never weak up again a study said symmetry is the key of beauty so all of you know how matter of good looks is right ? it's mean the whole life of you is depend on your appearance i think i will be alone for the rest of my life bcuz of this plagio 😌 but i've never been called ugly people always say that i'm a handsome boy but i don't turst them cuz i have been seeing myself in my whole entire life😥 is anyone who has plagiocephaly but still got marry with a person that you love 💜?

[Ankari420blazeit]

I have the same thing too! PM me?

[Hidden]

Hi Supremo, it sounds like things are really tough for you right now. It's great you're looking to connect with other people who understand and can support you - I know there are a number of people with plagiocephaly on this forum, so hopefully you will find it helpful to read through their threads.

You mentioned not wanting to live anymore, and that you're struggling with depression. It's really important that you get the help you need if you're feeling this way. We'd encourage you to talk to your doctor about your mental health, and reach out to somebody you trust to talk about how you're feeling. If you're based in the UK, you can call Samaritans, for free, to talk about anything that's on your mind. They're open 24/7 on 116 123.

As always, if you ever feel like you're in danger of hurting yourself, we'd urge you to contact the emergency services. In the UK you can ring 999 and ask for an ambulance, or go to A&E to let them know what's going on.

If you're based in the UK you can also get in touch with us at Changing Faces to talk about your appearance-related issues. Find out more here: changingfaces.org.uk/.

Take care.

[jay23cas]

PM me pls! i don’t think i have plagiocephaly but my fave is definitely asymmetric.. i feel you

[Fidzman in reply to jay23cas]

Do you have an Instagram account ,i Will PM to you? I have a similar condition

[younique]

Hi SupremoX11! Yes I have plagiocephaly as well. At your age my mindset was the same as yours. Please. Please get help. No one's life is set in stone. What is true for one person, isn't necessarily true for someone else. Whatever perceptions or ideas society has imbibed you with, know that all beliefs and ideals can change. Just because you have a physical difference doesn't mean you aren't attractive or lovable. But you WILL need to have a healthy self esteem in order to deal with situations life will throw at you. I wish I knew an adult with my condition at your age. This forum is the only place I've ever been able to find another person with plagio. So you're lucky to connect with individuals who understand how you're feeling. I'm glad you reached out. I really do hope you seek all the emotional support you can find. Keep us posted. 🙏

[younique]

Also yes marriage is possible. I have had some good relationships. Some not so good, too. Around your age I met a really great guy who cared for me deeply. I didn't have the emotional availability or trust of others I needed to have a mature connection. He's now married and they recently had a little boy. This man was also born with a physical difference. People with strong character and convictions are not shallow or cruel. What you'll want is to look towards people who make you feel good about yourself. Who accept you and value your different point of view. People who connect with you from a genuine place. The key is that you'll have to offer the world these same qualities if you hope to get them in return. We can't expect people to know how we are feeling and we can't bury our feelings to get people to like us. You've got to be true to yourself and have the self confidence to know you have the right to love, happiness, dignity, respect and success just like anybody else.

[Mrtyaa]

I have a noticeable one and same as u i got called handsome many times. I can see i look good from certain angles. But from the front my head is not symmetric. I was married for 3 years and the divorce wasn't because of it. But yea I worry now about finding love now but love shouldn't all be about looks.Recently i struggle talking to people face to face without turning my head and not look them straight. I always think of how my head is misshapen while i talk. Wearing hat would help with confidence but i dont wanna be addicted to wearing one all the time.

It's just sad for me how this could have been corrected easily and now i will struggle my whole life because a doctor thought it wasn't a big deal and it will go away..

In the end life is short so try enjoy it and dont focus on that. I can tell u that when u find someone that will love u with ur flaws. It will be eaiser. I cant lie being alone now isn't always easy.

[Hidden in reply to Mrtyaa]

Hi Mrtyaa and welcome to the community- it's great to have you here. Thanks for sharing your experiences and some of the challenges you have faced. It sounds like things haven't been easy for you. You're right that feeling alone can be tough, I hope you'll find people to connect with here.

Take care

Tiffany

[JudelJhon]

I'm 16 years old male with mild to severe plagiocephaly too!

[Solocat Community Ambassador]

Hi SupremoX11. I couldn't help but answer your message as I relate quite a lot to your present situation. I don't know where to start exactly, but as I grew up, torticollis deformed my head moderately, but enough so as to become noticeable through a misshapen head and uneven ears. When I was 24, I felt so helpless and hopeless about it that I tried to end my life, but thanks to my family's timely intervention, which could rush me to the Emergency in the back seat of a car, I am talking to you now. Yeap! appearance issues can drag a lot of aspects including relationships, treatment at school and work and long etceteras as you well said...and, yes, it can even drag your own life down with it!

After this event, I managed to lead a "normal" life; I had a stable rewarding job and I married and had three children...well the oldest one (my beloved daughter) is 25 now! So, now I'm 55, I've been through a lot (including the secrecy of my past attempt); I'm not so fatalistic and hopeless anymore, but I still get the looks and stares. I'm not going to lie to you (I don't think anybody in this forum does), I'm still very self-conscious about my appearance, but I see the young me in you and let me tell you IF I could make it through you will too, as you had the courage to reach this wonderful group of people who understand what you are going through.

Luckily I nearly survive that experience, but in my time (1990), there was nobody I could talk to, I did not know anybody that could relate to my struggles or understand me; basically, I nearly died for lack of understanding and information! So, I'm so glad you were so smart to ring the bell and find this precious wealth of friends! Therefore, right now go ahead and give yourself a big pat on the back just for doing that!

Please do this for me: Reach out to a good doctor and find medical help, find any partner you feel values you for who you are (your personality, love, charm, and your chivalry), not just for how you look, without judging them in any way (believe it or not, we all judge others a lot too!), and come back anytime let me know how you are doing. Down days will come time and again forever, but I will be here for you if you need me, as I'm sure all those wonderful friends who have replied with such warmth and love do.

A big hug, SupremoX11, I really look forward to hearing from you soon with any news, just reach out to me! 😜

[craigtyrrell1222]

hi supremo, i am also 17 suffering with plagio. i can completely understand what you are going threw and i do also hate when people say that i do look handsome, i know it is to not offend me and them being polite, i have been bulied, called names, laughed at and stared at... ive gotten to the stage where i am looking to date, online dateing is a death trap when it comes to plagio, i find myself trynna hide the fact i have it, i feel like i am lieing to people when i only show my front veiw threw pictures cause i know i look like a completely different person from each side of my face... i have tried online dating before and when i meet dates in person they would change they way they think of me and give this odd look as if i was an monster... yes i am still struggleing but ive learned that my plagio is just a part of me and just gives a reason to make myself the best version i can be and not let anyone or my plagio in my way of being happy, as long as you talk to people you trust aboout your problems, stay confident and stick threw the hard times their is nothing that can stop you, i wish you the best and your not alone .

🙏