Hubby is still waiting to hear from the alcohol addiction charity, that the Hepatology Alcohol nurses have referred him too.
So hubby has been left to his own devices for now. As you will have seen from my previous posts he has been cutting down. Last week he was drinking between 10 and 20 units a day.
Hubby thought he would cold turkey day 1, drink day 2, cold turkey day 3, etc. However that has been harder than hubby expected. Not because of physical symptoms but because of mental symptoms.
We have changed his favourite brand of cider for a lower % shop own brand.
Monday he drank nothing and seemed fine, he also slept well that night. Tuesday morning his shakes were less, but he was fighting with his mind to have a drink. Hubby had more energy today, so kept himself busy in the garden. Hubby had his first cider at 18:00. Hubby had 3 more ciders before he went to bed, but hubby did not sleep at all well. However he has had insomnia for months and months.
Yesterday morning when hubby woke up his physical symptoms seemed fine, but his head was telling him to get a cider. Hubby was really confused on what to do. Should he have a cider today or not? He kept asking me what I thought he should do? We spoke about what the Dr's and yourselves had advised him about not doing cold turkey. I reminded him how many units he was drinking last week and suggested maybe this week he stuck to 4 cans per day, as that would halve his units from last week to 8.8 units per day this week. Hubby took himself out into the garden again to try and keep himself busy.
Hubby held out until 19:30 and then got a cider. That one can lasted him two hours. He had one more cider before he went to bed. So he only ended up having 4.4 units yesterday.
We are due to move house at the end of Feb or beginning of March. I have suggested to hubby that maybe he continues to cut down each week until we move. He could then leave his alcoholic self at our old house and start his new life at the new house as tee total???
My daughters and I are doing everything that we can to support, encourage and congratulate hubby on his progress so far. My daughters, our family, my best friend and you guys are all supporting me. I had a rough few days over the weekend, but am feeling much better now.
This is a very tough journey for all of us, but I think hubby definitely has the hardest job of all x Lisa
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mumof3girls
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Hi Lisa. Oh wow! Please please tell.hubby from me he is doing great! .
Coming off alcohol is a difficult journey, can take months for some, with myself I was psychologically dependant for a good year but I eventually won in the end
You are all doing so well Lisa, you should be so proud, any reduction of any kind is what's needed , you do it your way as to how hubby feels.
Try contacting the alcohol support group hubby has been referred to ,
Keep on at them Lisa, badger the GP ,hospital if needed, I find that's what I have to do if I want to get anything done.
I had a few grim weeks of withdrawal with high anxiety and not much sleep. His cravings will be off the scale, and it’ll be the most natural thing to want a drink. I’d certainly get all the support available, but he will need more willpower than ever before.
Hi Lisa,I have very quietly been following yours and your husbands journey since you started posting.
I just wanted to say how impressed I am at how you both have addressed this illness. He clearly now has the message, and that is in no small part down to your dedication.
Hubby does seem to be attacking this the right way now, and I am delighted for you both. Please keep it up, and do keep us updated. Obviously he still remains quite ill, and through some of your earlier posts I felt the situation quite dire. However, I read positivity now, and you can’t get that in tablet form.
Hi, there is an online addiction specialist GP called Gabor Mate based in Canada, who has just made an online course. It does go into the psychology component of drinking/addiction. I have joined another one of his courses as I like him an agree with his approach. If you go to wholehearted.org you can watch a preview, to see if you think his approach might suit you and help.
Also don't know if your GP gives Zopiclone but this sleeping tablet might help on those very difficult nights, but they do not like to give many as they can be addictive. I find eating carbs and taking a lot of magnesium with B6 by viridian can also aid the sleep and anxiety.
I can’t add anything to what other’s have already said, but I see a similar pattern of what I went through. Like me it seems he has a loving supporting family around him, with this I have no doubt he will make the lifestyle changes he needs to make to come out the other side. We are also moving house a fresh start and it is a year today since I last had any alcohol, I have been given the gift of life with a new liver and very much look forward to the future. Keep doing what you are doing I can assure you that you are making a huge difference in helping your hubby pull through
Hi mumof3girls The first thing I’d like to say is well done all of you the family for sticking by hubby and encouragement for him and hubby for his determination to give up.
I think it’s a great idea about leaving alcoholic hubby in the old house 👍 , but moving house while giving up 😳 the pressure for all of you you should be very proud of yourselfs all of you, The wife and I hope with all our heart that you get a result and hubby has as good a life with you and the girls as I have with my wife since I gave up ❤️👍.
Hubby stuck with it yesterday. He waited until 9pm to have his first cider of the day. He had 3 in total last night so 6.6 units. Hubby went to the shop yesterday to buy more cider, I was worried that he would come back with the stronger stuff that he likes, but he stuck with the lower alcohol shop own brand stuff, that he does not like so much. Hubby even came on a 1.5 mile walk with me yesterday, he was short of breath and walked very slowly, but I cannot remember the last time he went on a walk.
We are very lucky to have a very supportive family. Our three girls and their fella's are great and all talk to hubby about his drinking and giving up. I have asked our daughters to text and call him a bit more than often at the moment, to help keep his spirits up. We also have my mum, my sister, hubby's sister and one of hubby's brothers supporting us too.
Hubby had more blood tests yesterday. These were ordered by the Liver Specialist to see if he can prescribe hubby some diuretics to help with the Ascites. Hubby is feeling uncomfortable with the pressure from the Ascites. Hubby has also noticed he seems to be getting the oedema back on his ankles/legs too. On another plus hubby has started to eat a bit more and has gained a few pounds in weight, but that could also to be to do with the meal replacement drinks that he was prescribed. One more plus, hubby says that he has had some feeling come back into his feet, as he also has neuropathy. he says that he can feel his heels again, which he has not felt for over a year.
Thank you from both of us for your continued help and support, it is very much appreciated
Hey, this is great. I know it probably doesn't seem like it, but it is massive progress. The willingness is there so please do be patient and more importantly keep your husband patient. It can take weeks for things to be habbit forming, even for good habits, lol. I am sure they'll be frustrations on the way too, but after a few weeks it will hopefully start to become the norm and then much easier to stick too. Good luck again.
Hubby is not having such a good day today. He was fine this morning, but by the time we got to lunchtime he said he was feeling really strange. I had to pop out and have just got home 15:35. The first thing hubby said to me was "I am sorry but I have a cider, I was feeling really weird, I have only had a few sips and I feel better already". I guess its where he has already dropped his alcohol in take so much? I will be keeping a close eye on him for the rest of the day and will call for help if things take a turn for the worse.
ps 17:45 hubby is back on soft drinks, as he is feeling much better. He says he is going to try and hold out until about 19:30 before he has another cider
I was never a secretive drinker, but on a handful of occasions, I necked a 187ml bottle of wine on the way back from the shop. It’s odd behaviour, but that’s drinkers for you. Maybe go to the shop with him in these early weeks?
I’d also limit the alcohol in the house. A craving could turn into quite a bender.
Bit pessimistic, but it’s just for a few weeks hopefully.
Hi Lisa, Try not to worry, hubby will have days like this, some good some bad some inbeteen ,it's a rollercoast ride getting sober, but the main thing is hubby is reducing the units which will help the impact on the liver.
Your all doing fantastic 👏!! no ones path to stopping drinking is the same but it all leads to getting well again.
As I said if you need any help I'm here to try my best to answer your questions
My hubby would stay in bed for long as he could and then the first thing he did was pour a can of cider. His first drink would be anywhere between 9am and 12noon. At the end of last year hubby was on average having 5 or 6 cans of cider a day and then topping up with white wine most days. So he was having anywhere between 13 and 25 units per day. He has currently cut down to 2 or 3 cans of lower alcohol cider. So he is currently on 6.6 to 8.8 units per day
That's amazing Lisa!! What a turn around, hubby doing great on reducing his units , hopefully he will be able to fully stop once he is down to half that amount safely x
Hubby's weight is on the increase, which I think is probably to do with the Aymes meal replacement drinks. Hubby's weight has gone up about 4kg since starting the drinks in January. Hubby's appetite has also come back a bit, so he has been getting hungry for the first time in I dont know how many years. He is still having problems eating food, as he still feels that it is getting stuck due to his hiatus hernia issues.
Hubby as been feeling uncomfortable with the Ascites plus his ankles are swollen again. He had his blood test Thursday, so once the specialist has seen the results he said he may be able to prescribe Diuretics
Hubby has been a lot happier in himself this week and his shakes are a lot better too.
Sleep is still an issue and he is still waking every hour or so. Hubby is also getting night sweats mainly on his legs.
Yesterday hubby had a real test on his hands. Our neighbour needed some help in his garden. Ordinarily hubby and the neighbour would have had a few beers each whilst working. Hubby took one can of cider from our fridge and took it round to our neighbours with him. Hubby has told our neighbour/friend that he is giving up drinking. Yesterday hubby saw our neighbours wife. She asked Hubby how he was and hubby says he told her that he has Cirrhosis and has to give up drinking. The wife looked at her own hubby and said I told you he did not look right the other day. Hubby asked what she meant and she told him that she thought he looked yellow and very unwell. Hubby confirmed that the dr's have said that he has jaundice in his eyes. Hubby was a bit shocked when he came home and told me about what our neighbour had said. However Hubby only had his one cider and then last night had two more whilst watching tv. So he only had 6.6 units, which is amazing as normally the two of them would drink at least 4 cans each and then hubby would carry on when he got home, so he could easily clock up 20 units or more.
So hubby is doing really well at the moment and the withdrawals are not too bad at the moment thankfully.
It sounds like just the beginning of a long journey. You are doing such a great job. He is lucky to have you in his corner. “This Naked Mind” It will be great for you both. Great for him to help quit drinking, also very informative on what to expect in terms of sleeping, withdrawals(some can happen months later called PAWS) .
Alcohol killed the serotonin in his brain, but after 5-7 days of pure abstinence it will slowly start to form again. If he sticks with it he will be sleeping better than he ever has without alcohol.
Firstly Well Done You, how supportive, understanding, patient and kind are you! Strong lady.
I read your previous posts, but didn't comment, because I didn't want to cause any confusion as I personally, went cold turkey, from stupid amounts of alcohol and valium, I had no advice I was told, so it wasn't good and I didn't feel it right for me to comment.
🎷⭐ Toot Toot! Big Up to your husband, Hi Hubby ((( 👋 ))) well done sir! ☆♡☆ Brilliant chap!
It sounds fantastic and such determination kicks in when you realise there's not really any option.
I think he is doing amazingly well and being super sensible. It means sooo much when you have support and understanding and he has this. Brilliant.
I truly hope things keep going well, no reason why not, as long as he sticks to it ( which he sounds like he genuinely is) and follows all medical advice. What a brilliant change for you all. Might be a little bit of a bumpy road at first, but hopefully he has nipped it in the bud.
Its bloody hard, but keep it up and one more well done just for good measure ~ pardon the pun.
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