Not where I was expecting to be today!

If everything had gone to plan, I would be in an ITU bed in London following an all day surgical resection and removal of 65% of my malignant liver. The fact that I am able to post from my own bed at home is not what I wanted. I had dared to raise my hopes & allow my family to start to believe in miracles ( surgeons have a way of sweeping you up in a wave of their confidence of success )

However, no miracles! Two hours into the operation it was decided that the metastasis were too extensive & had spread outside of the liver and the full resection was not started. So not only do I still have all of my tumours - they are now floating around everywhere and I am in great discomfort from the several holes that I now have in my abdomen, back for epidural, arm & neck for arterial & central lines. I am feeling completely defeated. I have no idea what to say to my family. We are just stunned. They kept me in overnight for observation & let me home at lunch time today. No plan, no idea what to do next!

So having a family BBQ tomorrow. Going to pop some steroids & pain relief & smile on through it. The boys know things are bad. My youngest just keeps crying & my eldest is steering well clear of me. Hubby really does not know what to do with himself. I am assuming someone will make a decision about what next on Monday.

If all your prayers & support could be bottled, we would have a cure. They helped me as I was facing the operation, thank you

X Cibble

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  • My dearest Cibble,

    As you are such a strong person, you must focus on your family, I have been praying for you, I can't even comprehend what you must be going through... Your BBQ plan tells me the fight is not and never will be over...

    Yours truly,


  • Dear Pear.

    I am sure that once I have recovered from this setback I will see the positives again. Just so tired and bruised from this last battering.

    Back to oncology tomorrow. See what's on offer.

    Take care of you & yours

    X Cibble

  • Dear Cibble,

    I will be praying with all my heart that they give you some comfort and guidance tomorrow...

    lots and lots of love and cyber hugs for you and your family,


  • Cibble you need as much support as you can get. You mention London, is it King's College Denmark Hill? If there is a way PM me and I will be there for you. I am sure everyone who reads your post will feel the same. Cyber hugs. xx

  • Tatjana,

    I am now back home which is 70 miles from London. It was The Royal Free. Thank you for your offer of support.

    I think now is the time for me to pull my family in close.

    X Cibble

  • Cibble you listen to your heart what it is telling you and that will be the right thing. XX

  • god bless you.

    so sorry to hear this. i was hoping for some good news in the coming week.

    Your so strong, im taking some of it!

    i have worrys of my own now, my thyroid has suddenly swollen on one side, i'll be at the doctors monday.........

  • Thank you Ralph.

    Take care . Hope all gets sorted on Monday.

    X Cibble

  • Cibble I'm so sorry to hear this. My thoughts will be with you and your family over the coming days. I hope they can give you some answers on Monday x

  • Thank you Mama41.

  • Hi Kibble cannot imagine what you are going through, and your family my heart and prayers go out to you all, but again you are very strong person, I hope they come up with something on Monday, if its 29 the I am there, if its kings college, I have my six monthly scans there, heptologist is proffesser John O'Grady, I am there from 9am just want you to know that I am there if time is any good to you. Annette

  • Thank you hut I am not in London now. Take care. I hope you can get your problems sorted with your team on Monday.

    X Cibble

  • πŸ˜“πŸ˜“πŸ˜“ all my love and hugs are being sent your way xxxxx you have been so strong and positive - you will be again xxxxx enjoy your bbq with the family xxxx much loves 😘😘😘😘😘😘😘

  • So sorry to hear this awfully sad news. I wish you and your family all the best. Stay strong as always love.

  • Thank you Scotty.

  • I'm so sorry to hear this news, your strength, courage and determination will see you and your family through this. Will be thinking of you all xxxx

  • Thank you Mormer

  • Dear Cibble

    I couldn't believe I had read what I had read! You must have been devastated to wake up thinking it had been done and then find it wasn't. As every one else has said you are just so strong and so that is your strength.

    I read somewhere on the internet about a new drug NIVULAB being tested in America and hopeful for HCCs

    I dont know whether it's on trial here yet or not but worth asking . (I'm going to ask about it for my husband who has four hccs which cant be operated on)

    Keep Strong xx


    Yahoo! Finance

    I meant **NIVOLUMAB** not Nivulab silly me



    This link will take you there if you copy paste it into adress bar - i didnt relaise its also called OPDIVO


  • Thank you. I will look into it. I am aware of its use in malignant melanoma.

    X Cibble

  • My prayers are with u...stay sure there would be a miracle soon...god give strength to your family...

  • Thank you

  • God bless you Cibble..stay strong for yourself and your family...just keep on fighting with the hope of something that can help you get through thoughts and prayers are with you at this time. Xx

  • Dear Cibble

    Please accept our sincere apologies for the inappropriate posts which were on your thread - these have now been removed and the user blocked.

    Our thoughts are with you at this difficult time and we wish you all the very best in getting the treatment and support you need.

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