I am feeling scared.(sorry dont know w... - British Liver Trust

British Liver Trust
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I am feeling scared.(sorry dont know where to post)

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Hey, guys, I hope you don't mind me posting here, I found this forum and did not know where else to post. I am a 27-year-old male. I have been on alcohol on and of for about 7 years now, only in the last couple of years I would say since 2017 I have been drinking massive amounts (this was 7% wine at the time) Since last year it's gone from (couple occasions of vodka and coke) To mostly beer witch for me is good progress wise seeing used be wine and hard liquor . Anyway, I am starting to get heart pain (sometimes) and i sleep loads and get tipsy just on a couple of beers now. I went to hospital September last year ( it was a depressing day for me and loads went on) was admitted for alcohol over dose the doctor told me I have scarring of the liver, since September its been beer about 4-5 cans or 2-1 cans a day. I'm really scared to go to my doctors for another test is going try best I can tomorrow but I am so worried scared and I don't like asking for things tough if its worth my life! I suffer from depression, personality disorder, and anxiety, I sometimes think I want to die but I really don't u know? anyway, to this post I have two questions

how can I be confident enough talk/call my doctors :(

Do I even have a chance by what u heard to least reverse or not go into liver failure?

29 Replies
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Hi,

First of all, I would tell you to seek help in trying to quit drinking alcohol and also seek help to why you use alcohol as a crouch. Try and amend your diet to eat foods that help the liver function better and maybe repair it like avocado, leafy greens, kale, cabbage, broccoli, and sprouts. You may have a fatty liver from excess alcohol so liver function maybe low. Research the Keto Diet and intermittent fasting as that is what I'm on now to try and fix my liver from Non-alcoholic fatty liver and reducing inflammation in the body. I've been on it for 5 months now and have lost 55 lbs (nearly 4 stone) I have never felt so healthy, also maybe reducing the amount of carbs and sugar may help you put less stress on the liver.

Good Luck!

Hello friend, I have cirhosis of the liver due to alcohol and hep c. Two years ago i thought i had past the point of no return and became very depressed. I was told if I didn,t quit I would be dead in two years. I stopped drinking, and slowly my fatigue and other symptoms have improved. My fibro scan which measures liver stiffness, fibrosis and cirhosis levels has gone from 75 plus down to 30 kpa. Fibrosis as I understand it can reverse but not cirhosis however you can live on a small amount of liver quite happily so the key if your damage is like mine iriversable is to stop abusing your liver straightaway. If you need support to do this many folk find AA helpful , there are other options which your doctor can refer you to. Please go to your doctor and have the tests done so you know where you stand. Ask the receptionist for the best doc to see for your problems, perhaps take a friend for moral support, and write out any questions beforehand so you don,t forget. You can ask your doc to refer you to a dietician for advise a low sugar, low salt diet with fresh food little processed is best. But i cannot emphasise enough that you must give up the drink to give your liver a fighting chance. Depending on the amount of scaring your doc may recomend extra vit B, I also take a good qualitative and the natural multi Vit, znd vit D but ask your Doctor. Exercise is also important, as is giving up smoking if you do. It is not an easy road but well worth it, you are worth it. Happy to chat agsi with you if you want, I expect others will chip in with advice it is a lovely supportive group of people. 😊 m.b......x

Megbird
Megbird in reply to moonbeam4

Well said. Thank you so much.

Hello,

Well done on taking the first step by asking for help, not easy I know! Please go and see a Doctor and tell them what you have told us - no holding back tell them everything so they can arrange the proper support. We can only talk about our own experiences as we are not qualified Doctors.

I struggle to ask for help and I was absolutely terrified when I was told my liver was in trouble in September last year. Thanks to the wonderful encouragement and support I received on here I was able to change my lifestyle to a more healthy one and as a result my liver is healing itself.

If you search my posts you will see I was in a right state.

Do you have people around you who can help support you? You do need to stop drinking and you do need support from what you have said. You deserve to be healthy and asking for help is always the hardest step to take. When I was panicking like crazy one thing I was told was that if I changed my lifestyle I would halt any damage from getting worse which struck a chord with me.

As Daniel said, look at changing your Lifestyle, you will be amazed at the difference it can make. I no longer eat processed food or red meat, sugar or salt, anything white and only whole grain brown bread occasionally. No pasta or anything like that. I eat a lot of fish, veg and fruit and only fresh or frozen.

As a result I have lost 3 stone since September and do 30 mins strength training and 30 mins cardio a day. If I miss it I try not to stress about it. It won’t be easy but if you stick at it you should start to feel a lot better not only physically but also mentally.

There were times when I completely freaked out and panicked and I came on here and everyone was so supportive it has really helped me. I still have a long way to go but I’m getting there.

So, make that appointment with your Doctor, you are a precious human being and you deserve to to be healthy and happy and we are all rooting for you. Try not to worry and please update us on your progress.

Take care

Owlie

The “heart pain” may be due to acid reflux. I had it when I used to exercise after a night of drinking. That’s obviously scary, but it stopped as soon as I stoped drinking. A later heart scan showed no problem, so I’m assuming my chest pains were due to acid reflux.

You’re only 27 so have bags of time to recover and have a way better life. You’re clearly alcohol dependent, which is no crime: it’s not your fault, so go and see your GP who will be sympathetic. Good luck

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thank you for all your comments i will make a appoitment tomorrow and see they can do tests and tell the doctor about the drinking

Kev12564
Kev12564 in reply to Hidden

Great!

It’s odd there’s a perceived stigma to being alcohol dependent. The stuff is legal, easily available, cheap, tastes good and makes you feel great. It’s no wonder people get addicted to alcohol.

I’ve seen a few posts here about people being reluctant to see their GP. It must make the GP’s day when someone proactively asks about quitting* alcohol. I only delayed seeing my GP as I thought I could quit without help. My GP was very supportive. No lecturing or tut tutting. They of all people know how addictive alcohol is and will help.

* I wrote quitting as opposed to cutting didn’t as in my opinion - and many others - an alcohol dependent can’t cut down. They’ll always revert to heavy drinker in the end. You might as well tell a heroin addict to cut down. Quitting (for me anyway) is a doddle in comparison

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Hidden in reply to Kev12564

its the same with me , i thought i could quit on my own but i know i cant i have been fto a alchool person before and it din't help so i ran out of options but to try and do it again , i have cut down large amount in last years but i get tired after 1-2 beers and that tells me something isnt normal about my body i used beable have 6-7 without being drosey with vodka strangley was diffrent could drink whole 75cl but i guess diffrent alchool effects u diffrently.

more with me doctors its my past and people in my child hood(i wont go in depnth) but yeah can just try i also use alchool instead of cutting i talked my pyhsc about this and well Put me on this therpy thingy that clearly isnt working

Kev12564
Kev12564 in reply to Hidden

You’re doing the right thing, and I guarantee life will be better as a result.

Everyone’s different. I already knew I was dependent and had to quit. I’d researched a couple of drugs to help quit and went to my GP to ask about these. I then had to go for “counselling” which wasn’t what I needed for my case, but I grinned and beared (sp?) it and was then allowed to be prescribed a drug called Campral to reduce the urge to drink. Six weeks later, I stopped with that and touch wood I’m still not drinking.

Let us know how you get on and well done so far

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From a person with alcoholic liver disease listen up to me. First off...You have liver disease if you have scarring. Thats without question. Simply put if you had scarring in September and you have kept drinking you definately have more scarring now. It's just the way it works unfortunately. Good for you on the mental tip that you've cut out hard liquor but understand as far as liver scarring goes your liver doesnt care what type of alcohol it is on the physical aspect. Ill spare you the science lesson but one shot of vodka or one pint of beer is going to do the same damage.

Noone here is qualified to tell you how much damage you have incurred or what your odds are of regression. You have to see a doctor and find out what stage your liver disease is at. I can tell you though that if you keep drinking it will keep progressing and some day it WILL kill you. The more you drink the faster it progresses and the faster it progresses the closer you get to the liver failure your so afraid of and that's if a comorbidity of liver disease dosent kill you first. Again sorry for the brashness but that's the course of alcoholic liver disease and there's no nicer way to put that. It's a nightmare of a disease if you dont get the reins on it quick. I live it and I know it.

The good news CAN be is that for many people with alcoholic liver disease the progression can be halted or at the very least slowed right down. Even if it has gone as far as cirrhosis you can remain compensated and potentially over some years time see some regression. But there is a point of no return where its liver transplant or liver failure. Im confident you are not at that point yet but, there is no cure or treatment for alcholic liver disease currently. The only thing you can do is eat well and stay off the alcohol. Liver disease is a chronic progressive disease and will keep progressing with alcohol. I cant make this any more clear that you will not be able to drink again for the rest of your life. Period end of story. Its sucks believe me I know but, it's the way it is. So I'll leave you with this"

#1- Talk to your doctor about how to get off the alcohol and stay off it if you cant manage that yourself. I'm going to be bold and say that you already are showing you cant do it yourself if your still drinking despite being told you have liver damage to the point of scarring. Nothing to be embarrassed about. Good Doctors will help you gladly. Addiction is a disease. Noone sets out to become addicted to something that harms them like this. It's only when you lie to them about drinking that they usually get miffed.

#2- You already know you have liver disease so an LFT test would almost be useless at this point other than to tell you how bad the inflamation is currently in your liver. LFT tests DO NOT tell you what amount of damage you have. For that knowledge I strongly suggest getting referred to a liver specialist (Hepatologist), and get an ultrasound and an ELF test done. Or at least a fibroscan.

3#- Check in here with us when you need support or advice. Thats what this forum is all about. Your obviously in need of support and you made a good move coming here. We are all glad to help you along the way here to getting yourself glued back together again.

One last thing- You asked about your heart pain and getting tipsy off less alcohol than usual. I cannot be certain but I can tell you that acid reflux disease and gastrointestinal problems are a hand in hand with alcoholic liver disease. It's possible the heart pain your feeling is acid reflux and not actually your heart. But tell the doctor about it when you see him or her. And secondly.. as the liver gets progressively damaged its sensitivity to medications and alcohol can become increased. That is likely why it's taking you far less to get buzzed than it used too. But again take this all to your doctor.

I got to where you are from drinking my anxiety and depression away as well. I'm now on the other side of where you are. It will never fix it. I promise you that. Let's get you cleaned up so you can see that. Good luck young man

- Phoenix

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There's not a great deal I can really add as Phoenix has spelt it out pretty clearly.

The medical staff can try and fix your body, but the underlying will to want to have that drink has to be addressed too. Something is driving your desire to have a drink.This can appear in the guise of depression. But then behind this depression may lie another hidden reason for this kind of behaviour. It could have been a really bad experience you've had to endure or suffer with in the past. In these sort of circumstances, the brain is unable to accept and process the issue. It then stores this, in the hope that it'll all make sense later. It can be like a nightmare that won't go away. This sort of behavioural situation, may lead to depression as the nightmare can't be resolved.

A person can then have depression for many years and not realise or remember how or why it all started in the first place. It is then common for a person to self-medicate on alcohol in order to lift the depression. Alcohol, in its self is a depressant, and so even more alcohol is needed to lift the gloom. And so a whole downward cycle of events starts.

I've mentioned this a few times on here now. My particular drinking life style made no sense. I could go weeks without wanting a drink, but then when I did started, the bouts of drinking would last for up to three days of solid drinking, (going on a bender). This had been the norm for most of my life, and inevitably all this abuse took it's toll on my liver. It's only when I had my variceal bleed back in 2014, (which was my wake-up call), did I sit up and take a look at my life. I sort of psychoanalysed my past, and started to join up all the dots. Firstly I realised that my drinking pattern also coincided with my bouts of depression. So, every 25 days or so, I'd have an attack of depression. This would last for up to three days. So, a pattern was emerging.

I then realised that something was causing the depression. I looked back upon my childhood and realised that I had not only endured the early death of my mother at a young age, but also had to endure both physical and mental abuse from a rather evil step-father. I was a failure, and nobody, I was a useless child that should have been drowned at birth. Because my young brain couldn't process all these stored feelings and emotions. This then was causing my depression, and ultimately my drinking.

Sometimes we can't change those things that have happened in our past. But we need to find some kind of inner peace for ourselves. Even by drawing a line in the sand, is a form of dealing with those demons. Because I now understand the cause and reasoning behind my past, I've been able to accept it and move on. I no longer drink alcohol, and I don't take any medication for depression. I suppose I have found that inner peace, and those demons can no longer hurt me.

This is just my case, and I know there are many people out there with similar stories to mine, where those demons and skeletons in the closet still live. They have to be confronted and dealt with. The Medical staff can fix the body, but the alcohol mind has to be dealt with too. Try and go back and search for where it all began. Confront those ghosts.

A life without alcohol is a lot better than no life at all. (Sorry for my ramblings).

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Hidden in reply to Hidden

Thank u

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Hidden in reply to Hidden

Very well said Richard

Hi sadapple Dogbot here if you look back on my reply’s you will see I am an alcoholic, I gave up 15 years last September looking for 16 this year. Please change your name because you’re not a Sadapple you have fallen into the alcohol trap , it’s to easy. Like all the people on this site we will support you as much as we can but you are the main character, please see your doctor and be honest with them and I’m a big believer in once YOU have made your mind up you can do it. I hope you have a good partner or family or friend you can talk to it helps, but I’m afraid you must get away from the friends you have because they are probably all drinkers . I wish you all the luck in the world it’s tough but please stay in contact with the group 🐶

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I don’t have friends or family but thanks for ur advice ❤️

Owlie
Owlie in reply to Hidden

We are your virtual friends, you are not alone! We are all great at listening and very supportive, feel free to meg me any time if you need to!

Owlie

Sadapple, you now at least have a set of online friends.

The advice above is sound. See your doctor as soon as possible. And trust me, even those doctors with a poor 'bedside manner' (brusque, rude, impatient), even they will not judge you for drinking. I agree with Richard64 above that most alcoholics are drinking away some sort of stress or pain, often from the past, but don't feel you have to tackle everything in one go. Your first step is simply to visit your GP. Good luck

Hi,just please go get help from your gp be honest,theres a lot they can do to help and in time things will get better.all the best

Firstly you have asked for help so you are thinking about it. Although there appears to be patterns with this situation we are not all the same. I was told I had a year to live, it still took me 6 months to give it up, denial I suppose. But I have, there is no clear plan for anyone, I went to bed saying that’s it and it was done and dusted with alcohol. Nearly two years later I feel great and you have to get it in your head that there is no going back. I had varacies and ascites but not anymore.

It helped me to sit down with my husband and a close friend and say ‘right what should I ask, what’s next’ we had a list upon a list, I took paper and a pen with me to write down the answers so I wouldn’t forget. Personally I preferred to go on my own as I have done for all tests and appointments, surgery. I think you need to think about that also, do you work alone better or together, if together who with? I’m not going to say it’s a long road because it doesn’t have to be, you don’t have to think ‘oh in 12 months, 2 years etc. If it helps take each day at a time, break it down into small steps of time.

I think you may come away today a bit brain muddled, write it all down as soon as you can if you haven’t already, that way you can go back to it, you will find more questions, write them down, I honestly cannot emphasise that enough. Personally I have found the majority of doctors are helpful but always have a distain towards me like I have a ‘label’ stuck on my head but if you go in with your questions they can see you are trying to understand, trying to get your head around it. All the best and please let us know how you get on today.

My friend I dont know how your situation is but I have cirrhosis for two year's now. I stopped drinking all together now. I had alot of ascites in my body,my stomach look like I was pregnant and I am s small guy anyway,always weight about 130lb but with the ascites I was 142lb. .I dont eat salt or sweet's like ice cream candy bars,cakes,cookies .no soda's,juices with too much sodium.get the orange juice with no sodium it all taste the same.the no sodium orange juice cost more but it's worth it.I eat alot now and my girlfriend keep telling me to stop eating that much. I eat chicken breast,pork chop's,salmon,steak,ribs with the no sodium sause.sll my vegetables are cooked fresh.I get beet root and blend it in the blender but also use a strainer to drain the liquid when finish,drink it plain or mix it with low or no sodium juices,fresh Spanish the same way and also carrots. I don't have any ascites right now and I dont have a big stomach anymore. Take your water pill like you are suppose .I am doing 10lb curls now and I'm starting to get my muscle mask back.please let the drinking go. I have learned my lession.Im still living with it but I feel and look alot better.

I almost forgot. Eat lots of oranges,apples,pears,walnut,almonds ,Greek yogurt,mozzarella cheese sticks low in sodium,fresh pinto beans,blackened pea black bean's and more.throw the can food's away for good.eat plenty of brown rice 100% wheat with your beans daily if you prefer

Mate you don't need to ask for help, it's there right in front of you. Most of us are scared to ask the question because we are frightened of the answer. Where most of us actually already know the answer, we just don't like the solution. At the end of the day we are our own worste enemy. Look yourself in the mirror and ask yourself do I want to see myself everyday or not. Then you just have to figure out how. Hope all goes well mate. Jai

You are yet another person who unfortunately did not receive help when you were younger because of awful life experiences. Alcohol is often turned to and its called self medicating. It is also possible to be allergic to alcohol. I know someone who is and just a pint makes him really poorly. He wasn't addicted so it was easier to just stop totally. You also to be suffering from loneliness? People tend to socialise in pubs but this isnt an option for you as far too much temptation. AA has groups nationwide and you will also get a sponsor. Of course you will need to be in the right frame of mind,ie wanting to stop drinking. Regarding confidence to speak to your doctor, making a few notes beforehand will help. The other option is just making a short but to the point opening statement. ie I am an alcoholic and I need help Dr. A decent GP will know exactly why your there and it will give him an opening to sort through the whole complex situation. Ask for a 10 minute appointment too. If a receptionist asks why you need to see the Dr simply say its personal. Everyone on here is now ready to support you, you can also call the Trust helpline. They fully understand your situation and can offer help and advise. You have seen how people have shared their stories with you - we all care because we are affected by liver disease. Hopefully you will get to change your name to Gladapple? Many of us have cirrhosis and its not alcohol related, but we are all in the same boat. You may not have got to this level, so getting help now you could well be on the road to a full recovery? Hazelx

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i was such a faulire :( i did not go to doctors.. i just walked right back with voices in my head.. and what i go do? shove down 2 beers and a vodka and cocke(75cl) im a faulire ..

Owlie
Owlie in reply to Hidden

You are not a failure!! Okay, you didn’t manage to get through the Doctors door but that’s now in the past. Tomorrow is a new day and you can do this. It is incredibly hard and as you can see from the replies you have received we have all had our own setbacks and false starts. If I had a £1 for every time I have been called a failure I would be a billionaire three times over. You are stronger than the negative voice in your head and you deserve to be heard. Try again, and keep trying until you make it through the door. If you can, write down everything you feel and show it to the Doctor. When I get scared and upset I can’t talk so I have to do it even though I usually end up in tears. Show the Doctor your post on here, I hope that’s allowed everyone?, you need help and you will get it...just take deep breaths, ignore the voice in your head and put one foot in front of the other and walk through the door. You’ve got this! Owlie x

You are not a failure. I consistently hid the level of my drinking and kept promising myself I would start to address it 'tomorrow.' I was afraid of experiencing uncomfortable withdrawal symptoms, but in fact the drugs they gave me made the first few days much easier than I thought. Are you able to identify what it is that is that is making you scared of seeing your doctor? And don't beat yourself up - if you are experiencing depression everything will feel so difficult, and it may take more than one try to take the next step.

I've just re-read your posts - you mention personality disorder and 'voices' as well as depression and anxiety. The Mind website might also help - you can get advice online, or, if you are confident enough, on the phone. mind.org.uk/information-sup...

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You are definitely not a failure, nobody on this forum would ever think that of you. Please don't beat yourself up. Try writing everything down that you want to say and when you see your GP why don't you give him the paper you've written on so that you don't have to speak as soon as you enter the room. You can then get yourself together while he reads what you've written, he will then probably ask you some questions. Just take your time answering them . Thinking of you. With all my love Lynne xxxx

Hi Sadapple I have read all 27 replies on you case. This shows how honestly people care after one another on this Forum and I am chuffed. You have come to the right place for support. I personally i wish i was closer enough to give you a big hug. Still have one big hug from me. We all care and all responses on here are well said. Please go and see your Doctor, if you are unhappy with one Doctor ask to see another Doctor within the same practice. And also change your diet. I found LCHF ( Low Carb High Fat) diet takes craving away. Others can correct me if this is not suitable for you. All the best. You are the best apple there is. Loads of huggs.xx

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