I've been holding on to several items of my Dads, including some things that are taking up space I haven't really got to spare. The problem is, whilst I'll keep very personal items that I'll always cherish, I don't want to feel guilty about homing other things.
So when is the right time?
Chloe
my parents didn`t have much anything my dad had was either binned or donated to charity we didn`t have much to hold on too sadly. if it`s crossing your mind then maybe it is the time for you more so if it`s items that can find a good home.
Thanks @Kenny kenster1
Always a difficult one, they're not worth anything other than to me x
That’s nice Kenny x
I think you know when it’s the right time. With my mum I kept her jewellery & a jumper that was her favourite. With my sister I didn’t want anything but her partner insisted that I had her diamond bracelet. I did take a leather jacket that we bought on one of our many shopping trips. It was brilliant day out that turned into an evening out as well. I don’t wear it just doesn’t sit well with me. I didn’t want her bracelet so I had it made into4 necklaces. One each for all her & mine granddaughters. They love them. With my daughter, we moved house two yrs after she died. Her room hadn’t been touched so I sat in the middle of the room surrounded by boxes & just sobbed. My son came in & said you dont have to let anything go just box it up. So we did, empty crisps pkts & all 🤦♀️. Eventually I gave her clothes to charity Her stereo to a young lad who couldn’t afford one same with her tv. The jewellery was harder. Her best friend was getting married & I asked her if she’d like to wear my daughter’s necklace. I thought long & hard & decided to give it to her. No regrets.
I think what I’m saying is if you think it’s going to cause too much pain don’t do it. I have been giving away mums jewellery over the yrs. when one of my sons married he ask for his sister’s ring which I happily gave to him. He had it made into a wedding ring. The silly boy took it off on his honeymoon in Dubai & left it on the beach when he went for a swim cause it wasnt there when he got back. It made us smile though part of her got to Dubai. My loved ones live with me in my heart & I think of them everyday. Items really are meaningless. You’ll know when it’s the right time x
Morning Caza
Such a helpful reply.
I love that you had bracelets made for all the grandchildren, so lovely.
I completely understand about your sister’s things, that’s hard and I gave a warm smile when I read it.
I could only imagine what you were, and still am going through losing your daughter, it’s all so life changing , my heart goes out to you. Your such a lovely soul and I so admire your inner strength x
That’s lovely Hidden
Especially like the thought of your dad’s bikes riding off( into the sunset x).
I’ll certainly keep this us mind, especially when I’m sorting clothes, even my own x
When I was moving last year I took loads of items to the local charity shops which I'm sure that they were appreciated there!
Managed to go to today's interview earlier on without any problems and I went away from it feeling it went well and that I gave it my best but if it doesn't come to anything I won't be heartbroken over it!
Those people who set up that fake job everyone was due to interview for yesterday I feel were very naughty when they did that and I hope the other candidates saw it for what it was like I did and told them to get lost as I did yesterday!
I'm thankful I saw it for what it was before it was too late!
This mornings interview I was the last to be seen and she says she will get back to me this afternoon at some point.
Well done Turnipgirl
You did your best, and that's all anyone can ask of you.
You deserve a break x
Do you have a feeling that it's the right time to give your dad's things away as if you do then it's what's right for you.
I am doing great and had a good interview this morning that went on past the allocated finishtime and she says she will get back to me at some point this afternoon but if I don't get the job it's not the end of the world!
As long as I know I tried my best then that's all that matters!
Thing is I don't control who else applies for jobs do I?
Last week I went to an interview in the city centre for 2pm on the Wednesday and got seen out of the door at 2.15pm and I wasn't heartbroken when they said yesterday they were sorry but I hadn't got the job there!
I reckon the job had unofficially gone but they were just seeing me out of courtesy which is one of those things I can't do anything about.
Aah bless, I'm fine, I hope you are too!
Ha ha, I can well imagine, restraint Hidden restraint, (let me know what you bought lol)
x
Here's some great news for you!
This lunchtime I got offered a job as a care worker at a residential home which I have accepted and will be starting on 2 April and I have accepted the job and asked them to put the offer in writing!
That pharmacy where they treated me badly have just started a load of new people to work there as lots of staff have left as they weren't going to hang around and put up with their bullying!
I went to see my sister in law and told her I had been offered the job and she was delighted for me and how I had accepted the offer although it was a shock to be told we would like to offer you the job!
That stupid pharmacy where they tried to break me can stick their job where the sun doesn't shine but with due respect though that was malicious and nasty though when they offered the job and then snatched it away all because my face didn't fit there!
That’s excellent news Turnipgirl
I wish you good luck with your new job x
there are services on internet that can turn clothes/fabric into teddy bears and cushions. You can always make a pocket inside for jewellery or photos etc. It’s never the easiest to get rid of a loved ones possessions but it must only be when it feels right. I still have my husbands coat and favourite jumper in his wardrobe in my room, ten years on. I very rarely look in there or want to but I know they’re there and they’re going nowhere. My sister has our grandmothers fireside chair which she no longer wants really but feels too sentimental to part with. I suggested taking a photo of it and taking a deep breath and pass it on to charity shop. I have too much in my head and heart to cope with another item that would bring new memories of old memories to take it off her hands. You don’t need to part with everything in one go. Take care. 🦊x
I have too much in my head and heart to cope with another item that would bring new memories of old memories to take it off her hands.
You’ve voiced that so well. That’s how I feel.
you have some lovely comments here Chloe40. From my own experience I made piles of things to go and to keep and it was insane I was getting nowhere. So I left it. I thought I was ready but I wasn’t .
I’m still not ready but I let clothes go (I kept one special outfit from mum and from dad and they’re in the wardrobe) I got a little chest and put the priceless to me bits and bobs on the chest. Now I can go to the chest sometimes, open it have a rummage nd just feel those memories - it’s very comforting
I guess what I’m saying is- there is no right time and there is no right or wrong. Everyone is different and if I didn’t do what I did and just make a decision to charity shop clothes that would’ve been okay too (I’d be tripping over bags and bags but 🤷♂️) I felt I was passing on mum and dads clothes as a gift from THEM to someone in need because that’s who they were.
W❤️
Thank you Will2015abc so nice to hear from you!
Yes, you're right of course and I love the thought of 'passing on mum and dads clothes as a gift from THEM to someone in need, that really appeals to me.
You take care x
The right time is whenever You feel it is right. I have things from the grandfather I never met (he died 9 years before I was born), some from my Grandma, and from my father and mother. Just a few bits to spark the memories.
Cheers, Midori
Difficult times when all alone.