Child or Other Family Member

[kitty7]

My adult son (49 years old) died and I have also lost my parents and a husband. The death of my son is such a blow that I know I will never be at peace until I join him.

[chloe40 Administrator]

Hello kitty7

My heart goes out to you {{{hugs}}}

Firstly, please contact Samaritans freephone 116 123 to talk about your feelings, you're sounding very distressed understandably, I'm not sure what part of the world you are from but I am taking it that it is the UK, if not please get back to me.

Once you have had a chat with a professional, you can contact your Doctor, who can refer you to see a bereavement counselling or therapist or they may decide on another course of treatment but please do go along and find out what they can do to help. You sound as though you need extra support right now kitty, so please do accept any help offered to you.

I really understand how awful this is for you and anniversaries are always so difficult to cope with.

We're also here to support you kitty, so please stay in contact.<3

Chloe x

[Hidden in reply to chloe40]

I wrote to the Samaritan's back in October when I was making the decision to leave my job and found them really helpful and I thanked them for listening and for not giving me unhelpful advice like to ignore them about the bullying manager and some things you shouldn't ignore and that was one of them.

They were great when I wrote to them about grief over leaving the job even though it was my choice I was still devastated as its part of your life that's over.

[chloe40 Administrator]

kitty7

You have been through so much loss that complicated grief seems to be affecting you, please do contact your Doctor.

I have some others contacts for you.

Mood juice moodjuice.scot.nhs.uk/about...

Samaritans freephone 116 123

Breathing Space 0800 83 85 87

Papyrus HOPELineUK on 0800 068 41 41

Chloe <3

[kitty7 in reply to chloe40]

Hello again: I've been seeing a doctor for this particular problem and he has me trying different antidepressants nothing seems to be working.

PS I live in the US

Judy

[spykey in reply to kitty7]

Hi kitty7

Grief is different for each of us, it doesn’t mean that it is any less intense for you or someone else’s need is any greater!! It’s good that you are posting and we will be there for you as much as we can despite us being across the water a bit!!

Like Chloe has written please keep contact with your Doctor phone him, go to see him, make sure he gets the message about how you are feeling about your loss & that you’re not just gonna disappear into the distance!!! He might suggest some talking therapies alongside some medication &?that may take some time to get the right meds but keep bugging him until you find something that works for you!!

You are going through a tough time at the moment & doing the right thing by reaching out we are here for you but it’s also really important that you get some professional help alongside, you might be able to find a group or a therapist who can also support you but you are not alone in your feelings and please don’t give yourself a hard time for feeling the way you do!

Grief is hard & we sometimes give ourselves a hard time & tell ourselves off about how we are feeling, or when we have a bad day & life is hard & we react differently than we normally would & sometimes we hit out towards others when they just don’t seem to be understanding where we’re at!!

Just take a moment & breathe & be kind to yourself!!

Grief can be like an onion, as we peel each layer as we go through different layers & processes & sometimes we feel a little touchy when we peel a layer off & it hurts more than the last one!! You will get through this it may take some time but you are not alone in that process! We will support you as much as we can & & like Chloe I want to give you a big {{{{Hug}}}} And to tell you to keep telling yourself it’s normal, that this is a process most people go through when going through grief!!

Blessings & Hugs are on their way to you!!

Take Lots of Care of You

spykey

[kitty7 in reply to spykey]

spykey: Thank you so very much for your kind words. I'm off to the doctor's and will keep you posted.

[chloe40 Administrator]

Hello again kitty7

I just want to hold you in my arms and give you a hug to reassure you that you're not alone, everyone here has been through the pain of loss, some have had multiple losses like yourself. I know that doesn't mean must to you right now but we all know what you're going through and are reaching out to you to offer comfort. <3

Chloe

[kitty7]

Thank you for the comforting words. Much appreciated.

[chloe40 Administrator]

You're very welcome kitty7

Always here <3

Chloe

[Hidden]

It's every parents worst nightmare having to bury your own child as it disrupts the natural order of things.

The anniversary of these things always brings it all up and the grief as well.

Is that your kitty in the pic then as it reminds me of my sister in laws black and white cat Zoe who died when she was 22.

[Kittykat50]

Hi Kitty.

I do feel your pain.

You've lost so many loved ones.

Your son I do understand its such a terrible loss.

I get you as I lost my 2 sons just 1 and 26yrs

How we do it I don't know.

Plus your other losses on top.

I was told about this site yesterday and the lovely support is so nice.

Plus getting to know some one as ourself makes me feel and others we are not alone

I'm 62 now going on 32 still very young at heart.

I think keeping myself young in my heart does help somewhat.

Doesn't take our pain away.

Thank you for sharing this.

As the same as you I have lost all my family.

Ioosing a sister too is so cruel as I bet she was/is your best friend.

Thinking of you Kitty

Sending hugs 🤗.

Kitty x