I give up

[lishapartington]

Haven't posted in a while but just feel like everything I'm doing is futile. Still on my Seretide 500 x2 a day with Montelukast, fexofenadine, nasal spray and eye drops, however due to splitting up with my partner I've had to move in to a friends for the time being...

And shes got guinea pigs.

I can't take not being able to breathe anymore. I've asked time and time again, more times than I can think of if she could PLEASE keep the house clean and tidy. Dust is one of my triggers, the guinea pigs is a trigger, the guinea pigs bedding is a trigger. I've tried to keep on top of the mess and clutter myself but its just too much, and it gets so dusty that it just sets me off. Another trigger is chemicals, so using bleach sets my asthma off. What makes things worse is her boyfriend is obsessed with vaping and continues to vape outside my bedroom window when I have asked him not to. He says I shouldn't get triggered by it but asthma will do as it pleases. Pollen is also a big trigger for me (hence the fexofenadine) and when people say 'Go outside, away from the guinea pigs' I just sigh and say its not much better.

I had my asthma review with my nurse about a week ago and she's suggested to ask my friend to move the guinea pigs outside but we live in a flat and there is no outside space for them to go. She told me to ask her to move them into her room but again, she's not keen on this idea. I'm meant to be moving soon which is such a bonus for me but the lettings agents haven't got back to me yet, and it just seems forever away when my symptoms are so bad. I had my lung function test and the nurse said I'm doing everything my end to try and ensure my asthma is well managed so it's down to minimising triggers now. She's told me to give it maximum two weeks with the guinea pigs out of communal living areas and if no better then come back and she will start me on a different inhaler which I can also take during the day if it gets worse (Singulair maybe?) but again, my friend isn't keen on the idea of moving them upstairs. I also asked one of the doctor's at work (I'm a nurse) if there was anything else I could do (I'm a nurse) and he suggested that even if I took my emergency pack of steroids I would just go straight back to having bad asthma once they were finished as the triggers were not removed.

So I decided I'd had enough of breathing salbutamol through my spacer every waking moment and coughing constantly and forked out £100 for an air purifier today.

And it has done nothing as of yet.

Basically, my reason for this post is just to vent - I'm so fed up and am trying desperately to manage my symptoms and nothings working. I just want to move out of this house. I'm constantly in my room as that's the place I get least triggers so I'm cooped up inside all day and it's driving me mad.

Does anyone know how long the purifier will take to work? It's a HEPA one, also if anyone knows of anyone selling a good pair of lungs cheap send them my way.

[mas7656]

I'm sorry you are having such a hard time of it at the moment. Hopefully you will get somewhere else to live soon.

[lishapartington in reply to mas7656]

Thank you mas x

[Yatzy]

So sorry you’re having such a difficult time, Lisha. You really do need somewhere else to live from what you say, don’t you, it can be very difficult to make changes in someone else’s home.

For your purifier to work well, be sure your room is as clean and trigger-free as possible to start with, by dusting with a damp cloth, for example, and having fresh bedding. The purifier should work in a couple of hours, unless the air is too difficult for it to clean effectively. Try checking the filter to see if it is actually working, or maybe needs vacuuming.

Sorry I can’t be more helpful. Fingers crossed your own flat will be available to move into very soon. Try not to get too wound up meanwhile, maybe try breathing exercises or calm music or meditation, anxiety won’t help your asthma, as I’m sure you know. Good luck anyway. Hopefully you’ll be through this difficult time soon..

[lishapartington in reply to Yatzy]

Thank you so much for your tips x

[Sylvsmum]

What an unfortunate situation you are in, would it be possible to move into a Travelodge or similar for a while? I feel for you, but also for your friend who has been kind enough to allow you to stay there. To be honest I wouldn't be too thrilled to be told I should keep my house cleaner, or move my pets !

Do hope your new place is ready soon and there are not too many triggers there for you.

[Tigerpaws]

It's very good of your friend to take you in but surely it's her house and not up to you to tell her to keep it clean? Try to spend most of your time out of her house so things don't get too bad for you.

[lishapartington in reply to Tigerpaws]

Thank you, yes it was so kind of her and I’m so grateful it’s just really getting me down about my asthma, she understands dust is a very real trigger for me yet she just doesn’t seem to want to make small changes while I am living there.

[strongmouse]

That's so difficult for you. Breaking up with your boyfriend obviously triggered moving in with your friend and the subsequent exacerbation of health problems. Well done for going to the letting agent. Maybe you need to contact them again and tell them that you need something as soon as possible. You have tried to talking to your friend and it doesn't sound as though either she or her boyfriend will make the changes you need for your health. I agree with other people's replies that moving out will be your best option.

In the meantime try to keep one room as free of dust and allergens as possible. Can you get out to the library or find some activity to get you out of the house? It sounds as though you could do with talking with someone who might be supportive emotionally as well as your nurse about managing your health. It is good that she is listening to you and doing all she can to advise. I know I have found a good counsellor at times in my life has helped me to think things through more clearly and given me the support and encouragment I needed to make changes. Don't give up this is just a bad patch and you will move forward and will feel better. Hepa filters should work for about six months but depends on the size of filter and size of room and how much dust etc is around.

As for new lungs - what size would you like and any particular colour?

[lishapartington in reply to strongmouse]

Thank you so much for all your advice. I really appreciate being able to come on here and vent to people like you and not get judged for it! I have a counsellor atm as I’ve always struggled with mental health issues and when I have my appointments it really does work.

I’d love some nice, new, healthy pink lungs please 😂

[strongmouse in reply to lishapartington]

Nice to see your sense of humour is working well!

[ChrissieMons]

I think we are all a bit concerned about why you cannot find anywhere else to live. It is true that your friend must be allowed to live as she wishes in her own house, so you must make other arrangements, with family or another friend. Talk to your GP, the housing dept. and/or a social worker if it is because you have no money. As you are a nurse, see if there is any nursing accommodation you can use, if only for a short time. Your line manager should be able to give you some practical advice. You have emotional issues after splitting with your boyfriend as well as medical ones and so you need time and space to sort both of them out.

[lishapartington in reply to ChrissieMons]

Hi Christie, thanks for your advice, I’ve spoken to my line manager and apparently the trust doesn’t offer nursing accommodation anymore, as that was my first choice and best bet x

[mikeski1956]

The last thing lishapartington needs is criticism, I for one know what its like not being able to breathe and having to spend many hours in hospital hooked up to a nebulizer

But I think we all agree the best thing would be to move ASAP

Good luck

Mike

[Sylvsmum in reply to mikeski1956]

I think we would not be here on this forum if we didn't know what its like not being able to breathe! But it is a tad difficult to be over sympathetic with someone who moves in with a friend then expects her to clean her house and move her pets. I have a cat (No, I am NOT allergic to cats) but if a friend wanted to move in an was allergic to cats I'd say "Sorry, not possible". But, I really do hope she is able to move SOON.

[lishapartington in reply to Sylvsmum]

Hi Hun, the reason I’m getting so frustrated is that I said at the start my triggers were quite a problem and she said she completely understood and would do anything to try and lessen them. She is a good friend however just has not stuck to her word about trying to clean up more/move her pets upstairs as she said she would at the start. I am paying her rent also so just feel as though it’s not a huge ask just trying to keep the house less dusty. I also hope I am able to move soon!

[lishapartington in reply to mikeski1956]

Thanks mike. X

[Paradigm]

Is there any way for you to take steroid tablets, even at a lower dose than usual, until you move? I know it's not ideal but if the letting agents are looking it could be a temporary solution or give you some respite.

Honestly, I think you should head back and get the inhalers sorted - so point struggling if the piggies aren't going to be moved.

So sorry to hear you're struggling. It's horrible when asthma gets like that.