Question about Claire Weakes

[Ckd123]

So I’v been trying to use Claire Weakes acceptance technique over the last few weeks. I feel it’s working ok but I’m not sure if I’m doing it right or understanding her correctly. Does she mean to accept the sensitization and symptoms of panic without fear or is it ok to still be absolutely petrified while accepting the panic is just our bodies being over sensitized?

I feel I’v been more fighting the panic than accepting it which I know is not what she means but I find the symptoms so bloody frightening that I find it hard to just accept. Also during moments of panic I feel I can calm down totally for a few minutes but then have waves/surges of panic over the next hour, especially when I’m not in the comfort of my own home. I find it a lot easier to practice acceptance if I start to panic at home.

I don’t know I guess I’m just feeling a bit lost and overwhelmed at trying to cure my anxiety. I want it gone so bad.

[Calm_mama]

Hi-

You're doing great. Just keep practicing. This is not an overnight thing- in fact, it takes significant time to learn how to do things differently and heal a sensitized nervous system. You've been practicing something completely different for awhile now- practicing a fearful reaction, and now you're an expert at that You can become an expert at something else but it takes time It takes significant time to change your mind. That's really what it is, it's changing your mind about what all this is. Acceptance means you completely and totally get it- that all of this, all the sensations, all the panic, all the discomfort, all the scary thoughts- it's all.... nothing. And it really is. It's a giant bluff that you fell for (and so did I and so did so many!) that led to a cycle. Casting away old notions about something is not easy. Changing your beliefs and attitudes is not easy. In theory, it IS simple, but that is not the same as easy :). Keep an open mind- open to the idea that you have been wrong about what all of this is. Every weird sensation is truly nothing- harmless, benign, nothing nothing nothing. Every weird thought is also nothing- anxiety is wide awake in there sending out frantic signals of distress, all day long- it's all just so wide awake and twitchy right now, but it all settles down when you lose your fear of it. And that takes practice.

In the meantime, float---- try not to fight. There's nothing to fight. There's nothing bad or wrong about what's going on with you. Don't swim, just float down the river or on top of the waves. Loosen and float to the best of your ability through your days. And practice acceptance. And just like anything new, you will stumble. Just like if you're learning a new language, you will mess it up and revert back to English. Expect many, many stumbling days of continuing to be afraid of something you've been practicing fearing. That is normal Practice no yearning for recovery (what is there to recover from when everything you are experiencing is normal?) Practice no rushing (why rush when everything is fine?) Practice and let time pass.....

youtube.com/watch?v=REOdAWC...(Not working as expected?)

[Ckd123 in reply to Calm_mama]

Wow thank you so much for taking time to give that detailed reply. I will just keep persisting until hopefully my body will stop reacting in fear. Thank you also for the link, I love listening to Claire Weakes audios xx

[eternalsunsh1ne]

As long as it's working for you! It will take a while, you have to practice it as you would with any other skill like riding a bike. Keep pushing, hope you feel better soon, I know how annoying it can be when things don't work straight away!

[Ckd123 in reply to eternalsunsh1ne]

Thank you for your reply xx

It does seem to be working for me so I’ll just keep persisting! I would love a quick fix but there isn’t one unfortunately. I hope your doing well yourself x

[designguy]

I don't think there is any "right" way to do it, it's a matter of just feeling your way along until you find what works for you. Getting discouraged and having setbacks are all part of the process and totally normal. One of the things that i realized i was doing when i thought i was accepting the anxious feelings was that i was really just tolerating them and really hoping they would go away. This was a form of still actively engaging the anxiety which was counterproductive. it was ok though, because it was part of my learning experience, although i didn't recognize it as such at the time. It was when I honestly decided that i didn't care if i had anxiety or not and it didn't matter, that i started to make progress. i looked at it as I had been dealing with and fighting the anxiety for so long and felt awful so if i surrendered and just accepted it, quit fighting, etc..., it couldn't feel worse. i knew it wasn't going to kill me, so what was the worst that could happen - nothing. Slowly i had moments of freedom and those grew into longer periods of being anxiety free. I had setbacks but kept going. You can too.

[Hidden]

Like everyone says, it takes time. It took me 6 months of misery before my mind began to understand acceptance. But I kept going. It's instinctual to react with fear to the panic. Being able to counter that feeling with acceptance takes time. And for each of us that it will be different amounts of time. I'm still practicing, but I'm seeing the results much sooner now...so for instance when I feel the anxiety panic start to ramp up I'm quicker to recognize it and say to myself, "No problem. I got this. I accept and allow these feelings and thoughts". I say that a handful of times and I notice that within a few minutes the symptoms are going down.

[Hidden]

Last thing...anxiety doesn't go away. Tell yourself, "I'm never going to be completely free of anxiety. In truth, no one can be. It's a normal experience that I'm overreacting to. I am learning to accept it and to be ok with it. It will take time, but I will keep practicing until I am not so frightened of it."

You got this.