Hi all, this time of year is so challenging for me. As I type this, all I can think of is trying to avoid catching a virus. For me, I particularly despise the stomach virus, who doesn't? I know how ridiculous I get about it. However, I cannot get beyond the feeling like I am, or someone I love, is going to die if they catch it. My brain just goes into overdrive at the mere mention that the bug is going around. Or if someone I know has had it recently, I plot how to avoid them for 2 weeks and subsequently start a 72 hr (incubation period) to see if I caught it. The regular flu this year is also so concerning, as the vaccine is not working, and it seems every single media source is reporting on the alarming amounts of people and deaths that have occurred. I have an upcoming trip with a flight involved, and we are going to arguably one of the germ-iest places in the US, Disney World. With my 2 year old, who likes to put everything in her mouth. I am so close to a panic attack. To top this all off, my husbands grandmother passed away today, because she had (of all things) the stomach virus. His mom was at the hospital with her all day and now I have to go to dinner at their house tomorrow. Its just too much. I can't relay my anxiety because they will think I am nuts. I just don't know what to do anymore. I feel trapped amongst my ridiculous constant thoughts. And I feel so alone. Is my only hope an SSRI? Will that even work? It would have to literally change my personality I feel.