Ask yourself, are you actually doing anyth... - Anxiety Support

Anxiety Support

45,800 members46,417 posts

Ask yourself, are you actually doing anything to bring about your recovery?


Merely listing your symptoms isn't going to exorcise them and lead to your recovery. Yes, it's good to get your symptoms off your chest and compare those symptoms with others going through the same experience. Specially when someone is new to anxiety and doesn't know what's hit them.

But forgive me for saying it but there are a lot of people who are longer term sufferers who don't actually appear to be doing much constructive to effect their recovery. Not everybody but some. Simply recording whether you had a good day or a bad day diary fashion doesn't get anybody any further forward.

A lot of these anxiety sufferers have a deep fear of becoming addicted to medication and possible side effects. Anxiety about taking anti-anxiety medications is itself a symptom of anxiety. So that leaves talking cures and doing some research into self help methods.

Whatever course or combination is chosen it's important to have some form if escape plan because waiting for the sugar plum fairy to come along and wave her wand and make it better could involve a very long wait.

25 Replies

Hi Jeff,

I feel that comment is a bit harsh.

Nearly everyone here is having some kind of struggle with anxiety or depression and doing the best they can.

Actually monitoring your thoughts and feelings is one form of homework therapists recommend. Sharing with others and receiving support online is therapeutic. This can fill the space and time between appointments with mental health professionals who can't be with us 24/7.

I did say not all but some. I still think there are a number of postings from people whose attempts at self help are conspicuous by its absence. Clearly the people who have sought help from mental health professionals don't fall into this category.

Yeah I was one 🙋🏻 But I took the plunge with low dose anxiety meds and I feel so much better! It's given me so much perspective on how many symptoms were from my anxiety and I feel like I can actually learn from my books and strategies now. Goal is to be Med free...will see :)

Jeff1943 in reply to DeeM3

That's a good strategy Dee, use medication to help you cope with responsibilities but also to seek self help techniques such as the one I'm always advocating: 'Self help for your nerves' by Claire Weekes (u.k. title) also titled 'Hope and held for your nerves (u.s. version) obtainable from Amazon. I know 30 years ago this book had sold one-third of a million copies and continues to be a best seller in it's field.

Your post kinda gives me anxiety about posting about my anxiety.

Why? I criticise only people who do nothing positive to help themselves and there are many of them. They need to be encouraged to participate in their own recovery.

Very true, but I also think for some people on here venting and talking are their therapy what works for some doesn't always work for others. I myself am a research nut and I'm always open to advise and other forms of therapy

But there must eventually be some positivity. Not all follow your example.

Your right. I have noticed a lot of symptom listing and most of the time it's roughly the same things already answered but not a lot of approaches on how to change it.. if that makes sense

I can see your point of symptoms and repetitive messages, but why do you have an issue with anyone posting positive daily update type statuses? Some people might benefit from knowing there are actually good days. I know I do. And I post them quite a bit. Like I said I can understand your frustration about what I call the “fishing” posts, but the rest I’m not sure about.

Jeff1943 in reply to Christory77

I make it clear that I am referring to those who only post negative update messages not positive messages about what they are doing to help themselves recover.

Christory77 in reply to Jeff1943

(Simply recording whether you had a good day or a bad day diary fashion doesn't get anybody any further forward.)

Am I missing something?

Jeff1943 in reply to Christory77

Don't know about yourself, Christory, but the people I'm talking about, the ones who ONLY list their symptoms and do nothing to help themselves recover are missing a lot. They are missing out on peace of mind and the good mental health that comes with finding a cure for their anxiety disorder.

Christory77 in reply to Jeff1943

I agree 100%. I questioned the part you wrote about having a good day. When I scroll through the threads it’s usually a lot of I’m dying, I have cancer etc. I like seeing the hey I had an amazing day posts. It gives me hope when I’m having a bad day so didn’t know why you would have an issue with that.

Jeff1943 in reply to Christory77

No issue with that, Christory77, the issue is with people who don't then go ahead and DO something to help their recovery I.e. something that will heal their over-sensitized nerves. It's nice to have an anxiety free day but unless the cause of anxiety disorder is addressed bad days will be back before long. Addressing anxiety means accepting medication, a course of therapy or reading and practicing what's in a good self-help book.

Hello Jeff I don't often post but I am a long term sufferer from depression and anxiety since teenage years. I feel I have to ask what gives you the right to judge others to question how they deal with their symptoms. This is a support group I believe. Many of us here have low self esteem and I think your comments will only cause more suffering. It is only to easy to sit back and tell people what they should be doing this I know from my weekly CPN visits, daily suicide thoughts, daily self harminig. Each time I take my high dose of medication. My Gp has applauded me for pushing myself every day just by getting up sometimes. Many of us are achieving so much and more by being able to just survive so please don't belittle and undo the hard work the majority of us have done. I bet even you at your lowest point wished the sugar plum fairy would come and wave her wand. We are all individuals in our own right and we will all recover in our own time frame. Maybe not to your standards Jeff! But to at least to have some normality. You don't know my background. You have not spent a minute inside my thought so please step down from your soap box for a second and realise that everyone, every second of the day is making an effort to the best of their abilities.

Did you actually read my posting, Jackie? I make it quite clear that I am not referring to 'everyone who is making an effort' to recover but only those who are doing nothing to recover. Quite a big difference.

So I say it again: simply listing symptoms and doing nothing to bring about their recovery (i.e. medication, talking cures and/or practicing self-help techniques) is not going to result in recovery.

My purpose in saying this is not to belittle anybody but to encourage them to do something positive to help themselves. This is my opinion and I know I am not alone in this observation and I have every right to express it.

I see where you are coming from. I think however everyone is at a different stage of their anxiety and at least being a part of this forum means they at least understand and accept they have anxiety. My only concern for others is when I see people seeking reassurance in the wrong way i.e. With health anxiety the concern is the health symptoms and not the anxiety. By feeding constant reassurance in relation to the health concern(which is the most natural thing to do) it actually creates a negative habit and does not actually challenge the anxiety itself or challenge the unhealthy thought processes. X

Jeff1943 in reply to Nicki1984

Yes, Nicky, I agree absolutely with what you say. Just treating the symptoms ignores the main problem which is the anxiety itself which I believe is caused by over-sensitisation of the nervous system due to a long period of worry, stress, overwork and disappointment. Anxiety takes many forms but it is always still anxiety.

I had the worst of days yesterday jeff and so purposefully didn't post on here because I didn't want to neg anyone out. That was a mistake. I come here for support and understanding. I come here for advice (and you sir have provided really valuable info on claire weeks' methods along with beebee and agora). But most of all i come here when I'm desperate and feel there is no end to this because I can be sure all you fellow sufferers at least understand. We should be here for one another whatever.

Jeff1943 in reply to mooner04

Yes indeed mooner04 but in addition to discussing your symptoms you are actually doing something about it by reading a good self-help book.

yes, I'm probably one of those people. I go to therapy, read the books, but still seem to be on a treadmill. I have a bottle of pristiq sitting in the cupboard that has been there for a month and I'm afraid to take it. Well, this is the week, i'm gonna give it a try. I thought I was moving forward, but had a setback last week, and I got to move forward despite.

Autumnthebrat2, you are not one of those people, you are doing positive things to bring about your recovery: theraoy, self help books and now medication. Nobody could do more. Three steps forward and two steps back is still a move in the right direction. I can tell from your post you will be a winner in the end.

Thanks jeff

I just got the book, “Self Help For Your Nerves” by Claire Weekes. Can’t wait to start reading it.

You may also like...