Grandmothers funeral

I've suffered with anxiety since I was 11 I'm now 24 and my nan recently passed away about two weeks ago the funeral is in two days I feel so dreadful my anxiety is going overboard I don't know how I'll make it through the day, I feel so numb it feels like I'm just going to drop to the floor I feel so weak I'm constantly shaking, She was my best friend in the world like a second mum she was more then a grandmother to me and I just don't know how to cope any advice please?

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26 Replies

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  • Breathe. And cry all you need to. And if you just need to vent, you can do it on here. Very sorry for your loss. Love.

  • Thank you I appreciate it & i will try.

  • Hi my nan passed just over a year ago. She was the best and still is friend I ever had. My every thing. She made me promise to find the brightest star, and still have our talks. As she will be listening. Losing her was the hardest thing Iv ever done. But in my heart and mind I have so many memories and so much love. That will stay for ever. That can never leave. I cry now as not a day goes by I don't think about her. I carried her coffin and I'm so proud to be her son/grandson. Stay strong and remember all those amazing memories. I wish you all the best

  • Thank you so much I'm so sorry for your loss too, I've never felt anything like this is my life genuinely broken hearted, My nans nickname was Moon so every night I blow a kiss up to the moon so she knows that I miss her and that I know she's there for me, if you ever want to talk I'm here for you also.

  • It's sounds like we have some thing in common. I could relate to your post and felt your grieving. Iv never really excepted her going. And probably never will. We've been lucky. If I can be of any help. Plz don't hesitate to ask. Best wishes.

  • I'm really sorry you've lost your nan, you have to grieve so it's better to let it all out. We miss the people we love so much when they pass away. It really is so hard for those left behind. If I can give you something that might help you then try meditation. It helps me so much. Try a class if you can it really does help calm your mind. There's an app you can get called insight timer from the App Store. It is free and asks for no money at all. There are so many free meditation apps on there. Give it a try and see what you think. Also YouTube have some really good free ones too 😁🙏🏻

  • It's the hardest thing I've ever experienced and That's a brilliant suggestion I will give meditation ago thank you very much.

  • If you can get to a class that would be brilliant everyone is there because they need to learn the skill for there own reasons. It gets easier with practice and I use the apps to keep me topped up in between my class. Good luck. I lost my mum and my sister so I know how hard it is. It gets a bit easier with the passing of time. Take care of yourself and I believe they may not be with us in person but they stay in our hearts for ever and are never very far away 💜

  • Thank you so much, lots of love to you I'm incredibly sorry for your loss also, ever want to talk about it, I'll try and help you too x

  • you may also find this forum useful

    healthunlocked.com/bereavem...

  • Thank you x

  • Hi Isabelle

    When we loose a dearly loved one it very upsetting. However is there someone who you are close to ? Someone you trust.?

    Although it is a painful experience others at the funeral will also be feeling sad.

    You may find the service comforting as you follow the service and as you do so you may find that you feel safe and that your anxiety will not as bad as you think.

  • I have a boyfriend but I have to say he's probably the most unemotional person I have ever known but I dont have any friends (mainly because my anxiety always prevented me from going out to pubs/clubs and eventually they just gave up on me) and I don't feel like I can talk to my family we're not close and for the last 2 years of my grandmothers life I was the only one is constant contact with her and I'm hoping there may be some sort of closure at the funeral service tomorrow although the thought of going terrifies me I want to be there when my it is my nans final goodbye x

  • Hi isabelle i feel for u i'm sure u will b ok i am the same when i have to go to family funerals, if i can get through it you can, good lk.

  • Thank you very much I will try to be strong as I know my nan would not want me to cry x

  • Hope everything goes ok,& if you wñt to cry just cry it is normal it will relieve the presure.x

  • I had that experience in life previous i also lost my grandmother and that pain is unbearable which causes depression on me dont worry just remember her good things try to be happy one day we all have to go through death and i beleive one day we all be in one place.

  • Thank you very much and yes I do believe that I'll see her again someday on the other side it's just unbearable to think it won't ever be again on this side, the funeral tomorrow and I cannot bare the thought x

  • When i see my grandmother death i cried a lot i can not show my pain infornt of other i just cried alone a lot dont know i cried sitting alone in a room. I know the pain that is caused by death of dearest and nearest one. Please try to claim yourself and jus remember she is always there not physically but she is there.

  • Thank you I appreciate your response and I'm incredibly sorry you went through this too c

  • Now also i still remember her and she is still in my memory and my heart yes it hurts a lot when i feel like she is not here but i will be waiting for my time to see her on other side till that time i have to be strong and makes her happy with what i do which is good for me so be strong yes its easy to say strong but try hard dear and take care of yourself and remember she is with us

  • So the funeral went okay beautiful service didn't manage to hold it together at all but feel slight closure and that my nan is now at peace it's such a shock for her to be gone but at least she's no longer in pain or discomfort x

  • isabelle1992, we always seem to find the strength to go through the most difficult things in life. Being able to say goodbye and find some closure will help you with your grieving. I'm so sorry for your loss, but know that your nan will always be watching over you. x

  • Thank you very much, it was definitely the hardest thing I've ever had to attend but now she is at peace so hopefully although I will miss her everyday I can learn to cope without her although I can't imagine it right now I'm hopeful I will one day x

  • Hi Isabelle , I cried reading your post. It is incredibly hard. I hope you got through it and are doing ok. I am so very sorry for your painful lose. When it hurts so much we know we were lucky to have experienced such love in the first place. I don't know if you believe but faith brought me through. I believe it's not the end you will meet again, you just have to take care of yourself especially in the immediate future . All the best to you xxx

  • Thank you very much and I will always treasure her love and our memories together it's hard to get through each day without her but she changed my life forever and she will continue to as I know she'll always be with me through everything xx

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