I want to go home but I'm afraid of what everyone will think

I'm 18 year old, female and I suffer wth anxiety. This is my first proper time being away from home without all of my family or friends. I agreed to help my sister in her pub and come to London for 9 days (she's the manager of the pub) I'm supposed to be here until the 17th but I just really want to go home and the first thing I think about as soon as I wake up is home, I constantly feel on edge and I'm having constant anxiety. I really don't want to stay any longer and I've told my sister this but she gets really annoye and refuses to speak about it and tells me I can go home on the 16th but not before then as she really needs help this week in her pub as it gets really busy, I've already done one shift and I cried at the end because it got too much.. Please help what should I do and how should I explain it to her that I'm going home Wednesday, I know she'll get really annoyed and might even tell me to go home Tuesday.. I also don't want her to feel like it's her fault or anything as I never see her that often. Am I just being selfish? Please help.


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3 Replies

  • You are not being selfish I want to say that 1st of all, I think for you it is best that you get yourself to a walk in NHS doctors and let them know how you feel and see if they can help you. You are home sick along with what sounds like you are suffering with some form of social anxiety. Your sister is your sister and as she will not understand and might be mad with you for a while your health has to come 1st. Ask your sister to visit here and see how others are suffering like you do. Hope this helps xx

  • I've been there - and usually, it passes. I hope that's the case with you. I think we often overanalyze these situations in our heads, and really make it out to be more than it is. I remember when I went abroad for a few weeks, all I did was cry and want to leave, but in all reality, the situation wasn't too bad. Take comfort in the face that your sister is at least there, and you aren't alone. And if you have to leave, don't beat yourself up too much. You have to do what's right for you.

  • No of course you aren't being selfish don't stay and make yourself ill if your sister manages a pub its her responsibility to staff it Its great you are helping out but it's not for you

    If she is a real sister then she will care and understand she is probably very stressed at the moment but you go home and feel safe and happy

    Worse case scenario its only a few more days then you never have to do it again Also its not like it's your full time job

    Think of you x

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