New member.. 7 years suffering and still asking myself the same question..

[AnxiousAmy]

Hi all. I've finally taken the plunge and created my own account on an anxiety health forum. I figured I might as well since I spend so much time researching online anyway. Very long story short, my anxiety started 7 years ago when I was 23. I very suddenly (I can still recall the exact time and date) experienced a strong feeling of what I now know to be "derealization".. well this feeling alone sent me in to a tail spin and I haven't been the same since.. a strange feeling still lingers with me most days of my life... what I am assuming is anxiety. My GP tells me that she believes I have Generalized Anxiety Disorder, which I would like to agree with.. However, my issue is that whenever I research the condition, the definition just does not fit with me and it never has. Most definitions of GAD say its constant worries about financial struggles, relationships, work troubles, etc. etc. I have stresses like that to of course, but what I'm calling anxiety is a completely different phenomenon for me. With my anxiety, I have no specific worries. Rather, I can be going on about my day fine and then BAM, this strange feeling comes over me. Exhaustion, 'woozy', lightheaded, and just dread. Dread that something is wrong and I just need to lie down for a while. Sometimes it passes within a couple hours, and I have even luckily gone months without the feeling. But, it always makes its way back. Lately, its 24/7, a really bad spurt.

Some people explain that they encounter an anxiety-provoking situation, which makes them anxious. With me, it's just there, no rhyme or reason, no known trigger, it just happens spontaneously. Others have anxiety brought on by past traumatic experiences. I haven't had any of these. I have had a very lucky and happy life, except when this feeling of dread washes over me and robs me of my joy and zest for life.

I guess my question is, does this sound like GAD? Depression? Or something entirely different? I've had numerous blood work taken, EKGs (after a few dizzy spells and chest heaviness), and a CAT scan. I feel the problem must be mental, but it just seems it doesn't fit nicely into any category.

Thanks for listening. I appreciate any replies on this matter, and I look forward to interacting with this supportive group.

-Amy <3

[Hidden]

Hi Amy!

I was diagnosed with depression at the age of 13, however, it went away and sadly I have relapsed into depression. However, my doctor, physiatrist (however you spell it, sorry) and many other professionals have diagnosed me with Generalised Anxiety Disorder. I have constant worries about my relationship, I have a weight on my chest sometimes, cold spells randomly when I'm warm, I shake quite a lot.

However, I'm struggling to accept the fact it's anxiety also. Sometimes I don't worry at all but there's this constant feeling of something not being right. Nothing significant triggered my anxiety, I've had a troubled childhood, but hey... Life goes on

Are you on any medication?

[AnxiousAmy in reply to Hidden]

Thanks for the reply! "A constant feeling of something not being right"... YES! That is exactly it.. For example, I could be doing an "enjoyable" activity for example, camping. But I know every one else is having more fun than me because even though I have nothing to worry about there is this feeling of doom surrounding me. I truly cannot enjoy myself when I have this feeling, no matter what I'm doing.

As for the medication, I have resisted it since day 1. My Dr. even prescribed me Effexor a couple years back to take when I really couldn't hold off any longer. Anyway, I feel I'm finally at the point where I need something to help. So I have made a dr. appointment for next week and I'm going to start taking it. Actually, the last couple of days have been so bad that I took half of a klonoptin (something I was prescribed for severe flight anxiety that I had left over) to get me through the rough part of the day. Not sure if it helped or not! If medication will straighten out all of the messed up neurotransmitters/inappropriate release of adrenaline going on in my body, I am willing to give it an honest attempt.

[Hidden]

this is sooo me the Dr just said I had anxiety and panic disorder.. like you my life is pretty simple I could be having the best day and boom dry throat... tense up sweaty hands and then Im aware I am getting anxious. out of the blue and other times Its because I am overthinking like tomorrow is my brothers wedding I am already prepared to get Anxious sitting in church with nowhere to go... I have good and bad days but mostly I stay in my comfort zones like work and home also yes I feel mental all the time

[AnxiousAmy in reply to Hidden]

The last year my disorder seems to be leaning towards panic episodes as well.. I don't get the hyperventilation and chest pain characteristic of a classic panic attack, but I get a sudden head rush/dizzy spell and then this rush of heat throughout my body. Then, I think I'm going to die, shake, chills, hot flashes, it's quite the scene... Good luck at your brothers wedding. I hope it's one of your good days!

[Agora1 in reply to Hidden]

Hi powsy1983, good luck at your brother's wedding tomorrow. Remember we are just a "click" away if you need support. Try to get caught up in the moment of your brother's celebration of a new start. xx

[Hidden]

thanks everyone for the support fingers crossed its a better day xx

[Zaizaii]

Hello

I have the same prob. Wen i go out with my friends or family, i have negative thoughts. There is always like a threat somewhere in my mind. And because of that i cannot enjoy n have a good time. There is a damn fear inside which is taking control over my mind. I wish i could get rid of that 😢

[Evelynarnold]

Hello everyone!! Ohh!! I've at last found some kindred spirits !! Likewise I experience fear and a sense of doom and dread that just comes over me and it can be first thing in the morning or when I'm in company out and about or entertaining !! It's a deep all consuming feeling!! It really scares me. But I'm glad I'm not alone with these feelings. Although I feel sooo!! Alone inside and that really frightens me. I can really relate to you all and hope we can help each other through it. Ive looked at hypnosis online , and exercise, deep breathing and try to keep my mind busy, walking, reading, listening to music and will never give up on myself. I sincerely hope we can all build a strong united front to get stronger and help each other . Best wishes and love to you all. X

[AnxiousAmy in reply to Evelynarnold]

We are so much alike in that no matter how hard it gets "I will never give up on myself" either. I wasn't always like this and I'm going to do everything it takes to get my life back! Thanks for that motivation as today is another bad day!

[Evelynarnold in reply to AnxiousAmy]

Hi there! Oh bless you! Why does it come over us at the weirdest times, like today watching a good film!! Really engrossed and then that feeling starts! Ugh!! Keep in touch and vent when you need to! I'm here for you, as I can sooooo!! Relate. What happened to you today? Have you been on your own? Or with people? Is there anyone close to you? you can offload to. Unless your in it, no one really can relate. Ive been listening to a hypnosis tape online, and will keep it up for as long as it takes. It's a fight isn't it. Your in my thoughts xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[AnxiousAmy in reply to Evelynarnold]

Well, I was invited to a friends cabin so was proud that I felt well enough to go.

Had a good time, but the whole time I felt I was fighting away panic. Panic for no reason.

I panic when I'm in the most relaxed of situations, atmopheres and around people I am totally comfortable around. So today when I got home, I felt horrible, perhaps from fighting it all day yesterday? I feel I can sometimes deter of put off an attack.. So maybe it just needs to happen to clear the air. Thanks so much for your support ❤️

[AnxiousAmy in reply to AnxiousAmy]

I must clarify when I mean panic attack, this is different than that dreaded feeling that's always there. The panic feeling is relatively new since the past few months.. That dread feeling has been around for years !

[Evelynarnold in reply to AnxiousAmy]

Well done !!! For getting out! When you get a panic attack, what are your symptoms? Also are you suffering with depression? For me it's the fear and dread that really scares me!! Also somtimes I awake in the morning and feel really low and lack motivation! Tomorrow I'm out for lunch with friends. I find it hard to do things spur of the moment. But hey ho like you I try to push myself and friends are very important. Hope you get a restful sleep tonight. Sweet dreams. X

[AnxiousAmy in reply to Evelynarnold]

Thank you! I actually didn't know I was having panic attacks until after having a couple.. I thought they were random boughts of sickness. But I'm slowly accepting that these episodes are indeed panic. They always start for me with a dizzy spell.. A sudden strong head rush of sorts that sends me into a frenzy. Then I think I'm going to faint.. I get really sick.. Like Lightheaded, sweaty, hot flushes then chills, nauseous, just trying everything I can do not to pass out. One particular time it felt like my throat was closing off. That was the scariest one. I don't experience classic hyperventilation and I haven't had any chest pain.

But yeah, the trigger for me is this dizzy spell that almost knocks me off my feet. I'm pretty 'sick' for the remainder of the day and still feel slightly hungover the day after. How about you?

[es27]

Hello and welcome. I hope you are having a relaxing day today.

Take care

[Bostonray]

I know exactly how you feel!!!!!!!!I feel the same way all day every day I have been suffering for years!!!my name is Ray!!!I tried everything!!!!!!!meds deep breathing alcohol nothing seems to work.i was diagnosed with panic disorder year's ago and I am still struggling I even got put on disability for my anxiety disorder.i need friends that understand because I stay all bymyself most of the time and I am not a bad guy.

[Evelynarnold]

Hi there Amy, having trouble replying to your post so I've put it on here! How are you today? Have you been out? I've got to get motivated to do my garden! It's good therapy but very tiring!! I've been food shopping and then I will get down to it.In answer to your question. For me my symptoms are a deep fear and heavy feeling, dizzy and get depression!! Sometimes I feel life isn't worth much! I keep these feelings to myself and then I get an explosion of irritability and cry a lot! Some days are better than others. I take 10mg citalipram, to be honest it's only a small dose! Do you take anything to help calm your symptoms? I truely feel for you and hope you can resolve this and I'm always here for you to chat to. Wishing you all the very very best.

[Rockthekasba]

Hello, I am the same way. I kept telling everyone that I wasn't worried about anything, so how can this be anxiety? and it convinced me that I was given a wrong diagnosis. A psychologist told me I had PTSD from the first attack, as I went from none, to almost constant 24/7. I'd look into EMDR and turning my life over to Jesus has really helped tons.