Fed up

I'm 52 and still have bouts of self doubt, I suffer from stress/depression and feel like I'm losing again.

My confidence nose dives into darkness and I struggle to find light. 

I generate a aura of negativity that repels people, and I seek to be alone when stress hits me.

Then paranoyer hits and I fall apart, like I'm such a really bad person.

HELP😩

[Hidden]

Hello

You are certainly not a bad person not at all you are someone like many others suffer with a Mental Health illness and because you do like any other illness it affects you but we do not choose to have this and sometimes react the way we do so that can not possibly make you a bad person but a very caring one or you would not have done your post saying you feel the way you do

Have you or do your friends and family know what you suffer with , maybe as I know not everyone is open minded enough to try & understand but if they are aware of your struggles they could understand more and reassure you they do not feel any less about you 

With anxiety and depression I believe it keeps a hold of us by giving us all this self doubt because if we could let go of this then it would no longer have the control it has and would not be a part of us 

Are you getting any support from your Doctor , therapy maybe ? this would be something that would really help and even if you are getting some I would keep telling your Doctor something more is needed because you are still struggling , there is nothing to be ashamed of admitting how you feel but to be applauded that you have the courage despite how much you are suffering to speak out 

Keep talking to others in a small way it helps to know you are not alone

Are you also a member on Action on Depression on HU 

I will put the link on in case you have not come across that Community you may be able to relate and get some more suggestions there as well and I believe the more suggestions we can get the better

Take Care x

healthunlocked.com/actionon...

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Thank you Bounce.

[Natsteveo]

The first thing is YOU R NOT ABAD PERSON please don't think low on yourself  you are in the right place honey we are all going through the same sort of problem somewhere along the line.stress /depression is a horrible lonely battle on its own and when I have a bout which is often just lately then I don't want people around me only my husband anyone else I don't wanna be associated with not because I'm being ignorant I think it's because they not understand and probably judge me as they don't understand what we going through!! But please be assured you r not on your own hope u start to feel better very soon x

[Hidden in reply to Natsteveo]

Thanks Nat

[Anxiouspony12]

Hi do you have hobbies?i find that writing stories and songs helps me alot.sometimes just listening to music or reading can help too.i can get like that sometimes & i find i have to find some way to take myself out of myself.the human brain can sure play alot of tricks if you let it.i think if you are depreseed the worst thing is to sit and think.cos i think it leads to an endless spiral of self doubt.i have found music and art helped me more than any medication or therapist.not saying dont get help from them if you need it but we all need something we enjoy doing and that can help us alot.i suggest that kinda thing cos you maybe don't feel up to hanging with other people can do that on your own:)and you may enjoy different things to me but that's cool it can be anything that helps you feel your doing something to distract yourself

[Hidden in reply to Anxiouspony12]

Thank you Pony12.