Its coming back :/

Well what can I say im still housebound but was beginning to be happy in my surroundings as I had,nt really suffered a panic attack in a few weeks and then wham last night a big one, but it was very different to any ive had before I felt as if my body was falling and that I was slippin away and I had lost all control, as if my heart had completley stopped beating , maybe this was because I had woken suddenly well I think i was asleep, I had woken but tbh Id been thinking maybe even dreaming so its possible I was asleep if that makes sense, whatever i was thinkin dreaming was awful it all centred around my son who is 6, dying a funeral a burial and me feeling so lost because I couldnt bear to be away from him and to leave him on his own a feeling of complete devasation , this may seem morbid but the truth is my son almost died 2 year ago and had to undergo a bone marrow transplant to save his life so to me it was a possiblilty, Its also funny as when i was a child i used to feel alone and cry for someone to come and sort of save me abusive stepfathers will do that to you, anyway enough rambling just thought id share and ask if this tyoe of attack I had was a familiar one in the anexity world thanks x donver x

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  • Hi donver

    Yes I've had this feeling of falling and emptiness and for me it reaches a point where I can't take the feeling any more and then it kind of peaks and eases off and then I feel anxious and tired. I've had the visions of my children being buried and visions of me taking my own life(not that i ever would) and its awful. im on medication now and going through therapy so I haven't had this for a while now. Have you talked things through with a counsellor or therapist? your son being very ill must have been terrifying and have affected you greatly. i thought i knew the things i needed counselling on but have been surprised at some things that have come up in therapy and how much it has affected me. Take care love eve x

  • ty eve x last night when i experienced this it was the first time ever like this so I sought of got up and panicked running around not knowing what to do then i calmed as fast as it started and went to sleep again without problem. I just feel my life is stalled and I dont know what to do Im spending all day every day cryin for no reasons and I feel like there needs to be a reason somewhere , Im on proponal but they dont agree with me so i onky take one a day and im on the waiting list for other help so apart from my husband im on my own x thanks again x

  • Hi,Unfortunately what you have described is quite common,albeit very very frightening.It is a form of traumatic stress disorder,usually from a distressing life experience.In your case no doubt from the distress caused by your son's illness.I had it for about 3 days after suffering a heart attack.It still comes back but always during sleep.Valium seems to help me.I wish you good luck.

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