My son

[Momsneedhelp]

Lately, I’ve been struggling to sleep at night. I have to wake up at least twice a night and it’s so frustrating to deal with. My stress is over my son and his issues. We’ve come to the realization that our 3 year old son, might have Autism and it’s been tough to deal with. I already have depression and I don’t always it under control and now things have changed and it’s hard for me and him. I love my son of course but I don’t think I can handle him being “different”. He goes for his evaluation in October and I have so much anxiety about it. Sigh! Life is just not fair. I love him to death but I don’t know how I can be a good mommy to him when I have a major mental illness myself. I cry oftentimes.

[CartHorse44]

Hi, do you get any support for yourself regarding your health conditions?Being a parent we often put ourselves last and neglect our own needs. But as I'm still being told when I often do this. How can we look after someone else, when we don't look after ourselves.

Your son has been diagnosed with a health condition, so as well as a mum you are a Carer as well.

Are there some Carer support groups in your area?

You say your son is different, but everyone has some health condition, it is very rare if someone does not, therefore everyone is different.

When my son was diagnosed, I saw it asi was very relieved to and saw it has a big positive, to get the answers I had been looking for, for years, to why he had his difficulties and barriers to learning and social skills as well as sensory integration. He could have the support for his condition to help him. Even though that didn't come easy and was a battle to get him the services he was entitled to and it has been a battle ever since. My ex husband saw this diagnosis as a negative, saying the comment" We will always have trouble in future". Whether or not my son had the diagnosis or not, a name put to his condition/ disability he would have still had the health condition, but without his diagnosis, he would have suffered without the educational, social and medical treatment to meet his needs.

Society needs to change to be inclusive for people with medical conditions and disabilities, it shouldn't be people with the conditions who have to change to fit in with society.

Masking our health conditions to fit in with society for fear of being treated different, will only make us suffer even more and have a big impact on our condition causing more harm.

Have you been signposted by your local GP or hospital services to any parents/ Carers groups in your area for support, and Autism support groups for Parents and children, where you can get knowledge and advice from other parents.

Now your son has a diagnosis, I would see that as a big positive for all the reasons I've mentioned above.

But you need support for yourself so that you can support and care for your son.

[Momsneedhelp in reply to CartHorse44]

Thank you! I will try to find some suggestions or support groups to help my family. My only support for now is my therapist and my sister because I can talk to them about anything. I have good days and some bad. I’ve learned how to pull myself out of the situation when I get overwhelmed. I’m getting better every day and I just want my son to get the support he needs. I try to take care of my emotional needs but as a parent those needs are always last. I’m not mad about it I just accept it.