I hope it goes well: Today i'm going to... - Anxiety and Depre...

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I hope it goes well

EricJones profile image
29 Replies

Today i'm going to Walmart and a store called "Produce Junction". These are two packed stores full of strangers that i fear. When i see them idk how to react to them. i'll probably notice them and hope that they dont notice me noticing them....but thats my fear when i go into these stores is that they'll feel that i'm staring because of my body language. Hope they don't feel this and my hyper vigilant secret is safe. I could use some support.

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EricJones profile image
EricJones
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29 Replies
Shnookie profile image
Shnookie

it’s great that U R going out. Perhaps try looking at the items in the store to start. Do some deep breathing exercises b 4 you leave the house.

EricJones profile image
EricJones in reply to Shnookie

do you think people will tell i'm paying attention to them, if i'm not looking at them?

Agora1 profile image
Agora1 in reply to EricJones

Eric, have you ever tried wearing sunglasses when in the store and around people?

My therapist had once suggested that for me in order to cut down the extra

stimulation all around me when out. It's enough to just deal with the anxiety and

this kind of helps. Have a good time, you're going to be okay. :) xx

EricJones profile image
EricJones in reply to Agora1

i dont have sunglasses, not a bad idea, but i wont be looking at people too much in the store

Shnookie profile image
Shnookie in reply to EricJones

I think people who R out shopping in large stores like Walmart, R in their own little worlds. I don’t think they will be able to tell re paying attention. Please try going into a section of the store that you like , I.e. video games. Try to relax looking at the items. Think to yourself I feel proud of myself for getting out of the house and going to the store bout on some clothing you like b4 U going out. The idea is to divert yourself

Blackcatfelix profile image
Blackcatfelix

Walmart is really bad, I agree, but you could try something my therapist said last week....try saying VOOM, it stimulates your throat muscles and eases a person. I myself try to focus on what Im shopping for and try to block everything else out, it does work, and makes my shopping trips short because I move quickly through the store.

EricJones profile image
EricJones in reply to Blackcatfelix

Good advice....I'm sitting with two people ..one house member and one staff member....I can't seem to ignore them...and their movements do they notice me or are they that glued into what they're doing?

Blackcatfelix profile image
Blackcatfelix in reply to EricJones

Theyre most likely glued to their own stuff, you just dont wanna pay attention to them try walking around a bit I do that to it makes it easier to stay away from everyone.

EricJones profile image
EricJones in reply to Blackcatfelix

how noticeable is it that i'm paying attention to somebody if i'm not looking at them?

Blackcatfelix profile image
Blackcatfelix in reply to EricJones

They wont think your looking if your eyes arent glued to them if your looking at them casually or what not thats fine.

SusieSoul profile image
SusieSoul in reply to EricJones

Hi Eric well done to you! The people are glued to their own stuff. They will not notice your body language at all. I hope you enjoyed your shopping trip, and can concentrate on enjoying yourself , as that is what everyone else is doing.

Downinil profile image
Downinil

Hi Eric! I noticed your post is four hours ago. I’m wondering how it went at Walmart for you today. Please let us know. We’re in your corner.

EricJones profile image
EricJones in reply to Downinil

Didn't go yet...dad still not here

Downinil profile image
Downinil in reply to EricJones

Ok. Will let us know how it was when you get a chance?

EricJones profile image
EricJones in reply to Downinil

okay

EricJones profile image
EricJones in reply to Downinil

So I just got back from the Walmart trip i went on...and I'm not convinced it was a success. I paid far too close attention to people that were near me...my body language shifted, in response to other people moving and checking out....idk if i'm cut out for this man.

Shnookie profile image
Shnookie in reply to EricJones

Congratulations that U made the trip. U we’re in a large space with a lot of people around U. How did your body language shift? The grocery store near my house, has narrow aisles and sometimes, the employees leave products in the aisles. I know that I have made nasty faces at times trying to get around people. Next time try a smaller place to go to. Take baby steps and it will become easier to do.

EricJones profile image
EricJones in reply to Shnookie

i dont have much control over where i go out shopping...my dad makes the arrangements

Shnookie profile image
Shnookie in reply to EricJones

I understand. Please think to yourself, I made it thru Walmart. I can do it again. People R usually off in their own world. We’re here for U on HU. Have a peaceful Sunday. Hugs 🤗 S

karenbx832004 profile image
karenbx832004

I hope you had a good day Eric. Thinking of you. 🌸

secrets22 profile image
secrets22

You are not alone, for I loathe shopping now and think everyone is looking at me ,and when i do go i keep my head down and dont look at anyone.

EricJones profile image
EricJones in reply to secrets22

do you think people see you with your head down?

secrets22 profile image
secrets22 in reply to EricJones

Yes of course but it doesn't bother me.

EricJones profile image
EricJones in reply to secrets22

really youre that comfortable with yourself that it doesnt matter?

secrets22 profile image
secrets22 in reply to EricJones

I think its because i am able to block them from my thoughts, its not exactly easy but i have to.

EricJones profile image
EricJones in reply to secrets22

you said block them...do you mean strangers?

secrets22 profile image
secrets22 in reply to EricJones

Yes i try to ignore them.

PuzzleArt profile image
PuzzleArt

I have been reading some of the replies you have received, and there were some very good suggestions. I can only report my own experience and it could be different than others ( everyone of us is a different individual, with different personalities). I'm glad you posted this and shared. It reminded me of the past, when I endured the same discomfort and mental distress about being in crowds of people and going to stores. All I know is that it wasn't permanent. It can change, but of course not always as fast as we would like. I don't even know for sure which changes in myself, either from changes in my thinking over time, or help from the support of others. I wish I knew exactly how it happened, so that I could tell others and save them from any suffering. I know only that it wasn't magic, and took some time. But I am "cured" from that particular problem today. And I wanted you to know that it can happen. There is nothing inside you, or regarding your particular family background, or history of social encounters, that can prevent you from getting over this. And believe me, I had one if the worst cases if it, and one of the most painful. It was not a particular medication or professional advice that did it.

Tressy5 profile image
Tressy5

Sunglasses are really good. I have them with me every time I go out and if I'm feeling really anxious I put them on and it really helps. I've been doing this for years now and would definitely recommend them. Good luck 😀

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