Depressed with no friends

[Lulu02]

I recently broke up with my partner of nearly 3 years. I lost a lot of friends through the breakup and the few friends I have left are in different countries, states etc. whilst I am able to talk to them online, I am really missing that human connection and communication with these friends are always very brief. I’ve tried doing things to keep me busy (painting, puzzles, tv shows, video games) but as days turn to weeks and then to months, I feel myself becoming more and more overwhelmed with a sense of loneliness.

In addition to all this, the past two months I have been dealing with a condition which makes me unable to walk, leaving me house-bound with no job or income.

I’ve tried looking for ways to make friends but it’s appearing to be near impossible. The only way I’ve been semi successful is through video games yet I’m still lacking that one-on-one physical human connection with someone.

[Hidden]

Sending you love Lulu02. I don’t have any answers I’m afraid, but for me I’ve just gotten used to having little contact with friends over time. Do you have anyone come see you, like family?

[Lulu02 in reply to Hidden]

yes, and I am grateful for my family and what they have done for me. I guess I'm just missing interacting with people my own age as I'm a young adult who loves adventuring and celebrating life.

[Sunrisetabby]

I hope you still have the adorable friend in your profile picture to cuddle with - what a cutie! Mobility challenges are difficult, and I hope that you are soon able to regain your ability to go outside, be it through a scooter or other mobility assistance device or other means. Have you looked into doing any volunteer work? Perhaps there are some local community groups that you could assist remotely? Although not in person contact, volunteer activities by helping your community may provide you with some relief, and potentially lead directly or indirectly to future employment. Best wishes.

[Lulu02 in reply to Sunrisetabby]

Hi Sunrisetabby, unfortunately my little guy in the profile picture passed away but I still have my 2 other boys to give me all the cuddles and licks. I have thought about this but I honestly don't know where I'd join and who would even let me considering I am probably a WHS issue most places. I would also want to join somewhere that I know had other people my age as I'm really craving those kind of friendships.

[Penguin1220]

Hi there, I have been struggling with the same. When I actually got with the partner I have now, I lost all my friends at the same time (all for different reasons).

My partner and I actually did break up at one point about a year ago and it had absolutely crushed me. My depression had consumed me so badly I was numb. I felt like I had no support because my friends had gone. I did although find a way to use this hard time to connect with some people around me that were going through the same. I spent more time with family and did a lot of self-reflecting and journaling to help me process these emotions.

It was a really hard time, but I felt myself healing. You just have to get through it day by day. I hope this gives you some inspiration and hope to start your healing journey. I'm sorry you're going through this but just know there is support for you.

[Midori]

Hi Lulu,

We are all here to help you, and this community is a caring one, although there's always one or two who will stir the pot. Personally, I ignore those ones.

We may be able to give you suggestions, but the cure is getting out there and meeting folks, even if it's only for a coffee.

I don't know if it's still going, but a few years back there was an organisation called Chatty Cafe, where a cafe would set aside a table or two for lonely folk to chat once or twice a week. I used to attend one, but since I moved, I haven't found another. Might be an idea to look up their website to see if there is one in your area.

If you can get to one, maybe when your mobility is better? People over 18 use them.

Cheers, Midori

p.s. I have just looked them up and they are going strong! I am assuming you are in Britain due to your spelling, and they are still offering meetups in cafe's, Mainly in large towns, although there are some in Supermarket Cafes as well.

There are other things they offer, including online meetups for over 18s, and a Friendship service. There are contact numbers on their website. Good luck! I hope it works for you.

[Lulu02 in reply to Midori]

Hi Midori,

Thanks for the suggestion, I did look up this Chatty Cafe and they do have some here in Australia but unfortunately they are too far for me to be able to travel to with my mobility issues. I will check out their online meetups though

[Midori]

That's unfortunate. Pehaps write to them and say they need to recruit more cafe's! There's lots of folk need this kind of interaction, all over the world, unfortunately.

Cheers, Midori