Can some of you befriend me today? My mental health has been slowly deteriorating for the past couple of weeks. There are so many reasons of what it could be, I just know right now I'm just not in a good way in my head. Overwhelming panic, the anxiety is off the chart, and just frozen in it all. I'm barely functioning, noises, people, and doing my normal everyday things has become unbearable. My thoughts are so troubled constantly. It could be anything, but this is where I'm at right now. I just haven't been able to shake it. Any help would be welcomed?
Need A Friend: Can some of you befriend... - Anxiety and Depre...
Need A Friend
Written by
ladybyrd
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
91 Replies
•
hi, I feel the same way you just described. So depressed, in bed, frozen, noises too much and just so down.
I was thinking to call a friend or hotline. Maybe take a hot shower. Maybe do like two dishes.
I understand and I hope it passes for both of us soon....
sending a hug...xx
Thanks for understanding. I don't know if there is a clear cut answer. I guess really what it boils down we have to seek out our own healing path. It looks different for each of us. If calling a friend or a hotline to talk to someone is a help to you, I encourage you to do that. There is no clear cut answer's, for me, sometimes just moving into another part of my house is enough to lessen the death thinking. Sending you a big hug, and hope some of what your going through today has eased up a bit were you're able to get out of bed. I know those feelings sometimes can be debilitating but it does pass.
Does it pass really? I feel it is never going to. I am so scared at all of this happening..
Alexapal, I'm in my 60's and struggled with mental health issues most of my life. I can tell you it does pass, but right now, for some reason, it's harder on me this time than in past depressive episode's. I've almost given up this time, not suicidal, but just in the trying. They say exercise and watching what you eat helps some. Theses days I haven't even wanted to get up and try again. Weather, Seasons changing, Holidays, and getting darker earlier doesn't help. I'm just not in a good place in my head.
I am 46 and I will not excercise or eat or do anything I understand. I am sending so much empathy and compassion as this feeling is a real nightmare. I feel this is hell. I had a nurse tell me I did this to myself. She is probably right. I made so many bad choices. I am worried about my overall health and my mom. Every area of my life is in turmoil. Too much to fix. I am so scared.
Slow yourself down a bit and take some deep breathes. Remember one day one moment at a time. You did not purposely do this to yourself, again it's the depression and anxiety talking. Take one thing and work on that, your overwhelming yourself with all these thoughts running through your head. That causes you to want to give up. You can do this, it just feels like you can't. Take good care of yourself, you only have one life to live.
Sorry you're having a rough time. I am also in my 60's and have been dealing with depression and anxiety most of my life. (Think we've conversed before?). My mood for a while has been fluctuating due to medical and health issues. The days I feel a little better my mood is better. I have a friend who will say 'it's cloudy or rainy or cold out'. Weather and season don't affect me either, doesn't matter. Presently not in a real bad place but some days just don't want to be here... My anxiety has really increased as well, some days debilitating. Ended up back on Buspar since my prn Ativan wasn't cutting it. Many days can't get out or just not motivated to do anything. I often curse the fact I have this awful affliction!! I'm not the fun bubbly person I was. Feel free to message me. Hope you feel better❗
Sorry you're having a rough time. I am also in my 60's and have been dealing with depression and anxiety most of my life. (Think we've conversed before?). My mood for a while has been fluctuating due to medical and health issues. The days I feel a little better my mood is better. I have a friend who will say 'it's cloudy or rainy or cold out'. Weather and season don't affect me either, doesn't matter. Presently not in a real bad place but some days just don't want to be here... My anxiety has really increased as well, some days debilitating. Ended up back on Buspar since my prn Ativan wasn't cutting it. Many days can't get out or just not motivated to do anything. I often curse the fact I have this awful affliction!! I'm not the fun bubbly person I was. Feel free to message me. Hope you feel better❗
I hope you feel better soon. Is there anything that might brighten your mood taking a walk or listening to music. Take care.
Thanks, I'm just getting older and been their done that doesn't work anymore for some reason.
I thought I had tried everything but there's always new meds to try. I'm on four off label treatments for depression as of this year.
Thank you Marysblue, hope the new meds. is a help. Let us know if the off label meds. are helping?
The meds are helping they work. Before that I was relying on 5-HTP, l -methylfolate Mhfr and Rhodiola supplements. Which work pretty well but quit working so goodafter years. Have you tried any of those supplements?
Those and st.John's Wort really work for depression and no side effects. I took St John's Wort for 20 years until it raised my blood pressure.
Thank you Marysblues, yes I have tried to go with natural supplements, they didn't work for me. The depression was and has been on the severe side. The times imbetween times has been moderate depression. Right now I'm on 60 mg of Prozac which is easy to start and get off of. Added to that is a low dosage of 2 mg of Abilify. Glad to hear that these supplements has helped you along the way. I would rather be on the natural supplements than on these synthetic meds. Thanks for the info. hope someone who reads this about the supplements will help them in some way.
If you're still experiencing depression you may need to talk to your doctor and increase a dosage. Watch on YouTube how to recover from depression with Dr YapkoIt's a great talk great information.
Hi ladybird, travel if there's a possibility. I know you are suffering through something. There are many on the planet who is living their every day life in poverty. This can let you feel that you aren't alone , it gives you strength. Come to India.
Thank you hope123, poverty-stricken is real in our world and seems to becoming even harder to provide even in the States here. We are beginning to see the effects of higher pricing and shortage of some foods. Thank you for the invitation to India, I may take you up your offer one day.
Is there anyone you can talk to, maybe a vicar or a friend or relative. My daughter is bi polar and has suffered depression for a long time, she won't answer the phone, so I do not really know how she is. I hope and pray before I die that she will contact me. I have waited 12 years. So if you have anyone to contact do it. I hope you feel more at ease soon.
I am in the same situation. Can't get out of bed or function everything scares me. I am isolated and have to take care of my mother thst I am unable to care for. My Relationship is not going to survive. Every area of my life is in turmoil. I sm angry as I did this to myself. Thst is what a nurse told me.
You didn't do this to yourself it's the depression that's causing you to feel like this. Depression is not who you are but an illness that's not your fault. Who in their right mind would want to have a mental health illness. I just want to smack people like the nurse you had upside the head sometimes 😊. Is there something else you could do for your Mom. I don't know her situation, but their are places out their that could be a help to her. You have to take care of yourself first, before you can take care of her. Hope you find some peace and get back to taking care of you first.
Alexapal, you can virtually smack whomever told you that. You didn’t do nothing to yourself. Hang in there. You can and you will rise.
I cant get up from bed I am crying my eyes out. I want this suffering to end
Keep reminding yourself this will pass, it just feels like it won't. Do one thing that brings you some hope today and offer yourself some grace, as one posted here. Your going to get past this and it will get better. You may have to do some hard things, but do it as to get better. One moment one step at a time. Don't put pressure yourself, but just do one small thing.
Why eint I get up snd save myself I feel so scared really really scared. Thank you for being here. I have therapy at 1pm. My therapist is going to be so disappointed in me and said I cant stay in bed. I need to order groceries and can't every day I am worse and worse.
Your spiraling downward. Order your groceries at least you are doing something. Tell your therapist what you have done and not focus on the negative so much.
Ok how about this. Get up and go lay or throw yourself on the couch. At least you are up and you moved yourself out of the bed. Let bed only be a place for sleep. That’s one small step but can make a huge difference.
Thanks, I don't think I'll be in need of doing that 😊. All of these messages I have received, including yours, has been a help and encouragement to get up and move around. A community, as this one is, can be a great motivation through their care, concerns, and words of wisdom. Thank you for yours to😊.
oh no ladybyrd that specific part was responding to alexapal. I’m so glad to hear you’re feeling better though and continuing to root for you.
I apologize, I don't know how I did that. Thanks for letting me know.
Oh no need to apologize. And ur welcome. I hope alexapal is ok. Seems to really be having a hard time. I saw ur advice to at least get up and order groceries. 😩that’s great advice by the way. Even the smallest thing is better than not trying. So easy to fall apart from mental health struggles or set backs.
Thank you, mental health struggles are not for the weak at heart. It's real and a battle every day it seems.We just have to continue to uplift each other in truth. I appreciate this community and what it stands for. A rarity to find in this day and time.
I totally get what your saying. Today is day 2 stopping smoking and I have been terribly worried about the future and afraid to face anybody. This is normal for me but seems to be amplified by not smoking. Maybe if we all hold each other in healing light, we all will experience the healing. Sending best wishes to you and everybody else on here.
Amen 🙏🏻
And way to go Stippler on stopping smoking. Hang in there. It’s not an easy task so you are strong and brave. Healing prayers.
Thank you Stippler for your post. I wish you well with stopping the smoking. I've heard it's a bear to stop. You have more strength than you think you have. Just remember what your doing it for, yourself, and in the getting better. You do what you can do, the doctors do what they can do, and let God do the rest. I encourage you to keep going, you can do this even when it gets hard. One day and one moment at a time.
I can relate too, ladybyrd . Depression, anxiety and fear, thoughts that swirl telling me everything is overwhelming. I keep reminding myself that it is the illness making me afraid, but it is there nevertheless.
As Stippler said, let's hold each other in healing light. Take our vitamins, meds, some exercise, do what you can muster, and at the end, allow God to heal us. Sending healing and light and love to everyone here.
Chmil, your right about Stippler post. It's like you do what you need to, our doctors do what they can do, and let God do the rest. That's all we can really do. Thank you, it is an encouragement to know others will come along side you to help lift you up when your down.
I cant move I won't I don't know why I am doing this or why I won't dave myself. I am in trouble
If you are feeling this way please talk to someone you trust to help you through this time. Your not alone, if we let ourselves spiral down that dark tunnel we all would focus on just the negative. Your no different than anyone else here. We are in this together. You are stronger than you think or feel. You can and will get through this.
Hi there, I am in exactly the same situation as you. I got depression and super high levels of anxiety.
For me it might be that I’m living in a very crowded city but I don’t know if it’s that.Or maybe because Christmas period is starting already.
Is it something like that to your situation as well? Do you maybe feel overwhelmed because “you have to be happy because it’s Christmas and everyone is happy?”
I didn’t want to stress you out with my questions.
Just to let you know that your thoughts and your feelings are safe in this chat.
In this group we are all safe.
Titinaki, no your not stressing me out with your questions. There really isn't any one reason for this depressive episode. I think just getting older over the years with these mental health challenges has taken it's toll and I don't bounce back as fast like I us to. Thank you for being here, it means more than I can say.
Feel the same too. I managed to get out of depression for like 5 months and now I am back on pills. But I try to stay optimistic. Is there anything I can do to help you?
I hope you feel the love of others reaching out. What brings you joy...or used to?
I do Joyfulgrrrrrrl, your right about the joy, haven't had a whole lot of that lately. Thank for your post and reaching out to me, it is a help.
I'm sorry to hear you're feeling this way. I had been feeling a lot of what you're feeling recently as well. I'm not saying I'm completely through it, but the more I push myself to try to do things that could make me happy, even little things, the more I've started feeling better. Even taking a walk or going to a coffee shop have helped me get out of my head and the funk I've been in. And trust me, I'm not the kind of person who says to just get some sleep and get some sunshine and that will cure depression or anxiety. But any little bit you can do to keep trying can help. And possibly medication if it comes to that and you feel it's right for you. Either way, you'll know when you're ready and want to make things improve. Sharing here is a good first step. Know that there are people here that understand what you're going through.
🙏🏻thanks for sharing this Indiegal. It helps a lot when we know we aren’t alone.
Your right Imdiegal, thank you for your post. It is a help to know there are others out their that understands and identifies with what your going through. Hopefully, the changes in my medications will be a help, so far it hasn't. I feel like I've just given up in the trying anymore and the shift hasn't came as quickly as it had in the past.
😩wrapping you in a hug ladybyrd and lifting you in prayer 🙏🏻. You’re not alone, those setbacks happen and sometimes we don’t even know why and why they stick around. It’s so frustrating and scary. Try to stop and remind yourself you’ve been here before and you came through it. You got this. Do some deep breathing and thinking this too shall pass. I inhale peace and exhale anxiety and fear. Try mindfulness and just identifying things when you feel a lot of symptoms to ground you.
Thank you for your hugs and prayers. I am in much need of something but haven't found my way back to it. I've stayed in this episode longer than before. It is frustrating and scary and that part of it has stuck around longer than in the past. Your post here means more than I can say, thank you for being here, it is a help.
You’re so welcome. You will find your way to even better than before. This too shall pass. Hang in there. Sure doesn’t seem that way when we’re in it but the anxiety loves to keep us there. ((((HUG))))
So true, thanks
Good morning from the cold UK. Self care alwayss helps me, a long walk, looking up to the sky, nature is a great Healer, hot baths, cooking, being with yourself, and a little tip, wear an elastic band on your wrist and when you feel anxious, ping it, it alters the brain
Lots love xxx
Thank you Florida1959, just knowing you all are here for me is a comfort and a help. I haven't been doing much self care lately. I've always been one who is a go getter when it came to my depression and anxiety. Take meds, exercise, take vitamin supplements, and eat better. This episode has took me for a loop for whatever reason and I haven't been able to pull myself out of it yet. You are so right in what your saying here. Hopefully, there will be a shift somewhere to change this direction I'm going in.
Hi There...I am in the cold (and wet today) UK as well !
Good advice about the self care from Florida1959...and the elastic band...and remember you are not alone...always reach out...somebody is here to listen.
Thanks lovely x
I can be your friend. My name is Leah.
Hi There...this is a message to a few of you I think. This time of year does evoke a lot of thoughts which can be negative....we tend to think maybe we haven't achieved much or that time is passing by and maybe you haven't mett a goal or something...it is also a time that we are supposed to be all happy with friends and family...well, some people may not have friends or family...some people may not feel happy...if this is how you feel do try and do something...if you can go for a walk...exercise even a little bit does help...maybe do something around the house...have a hot bath / shower...and don't feel guilty for feeling like you do...depression is a hidden illness...you just need to find ways to cope...lots of us on here feel the same...you are never alone...so reach out...on here. to a hotline or to somebody you trust...take care.
Thank you fieryangel, what you said is true. I'm just getting older and for some reason, this time around, I haven't bounced back as quickly as I had in the past. I don't think I've ever heard that depression is a hidden illness. I'll have to ponder that one a bit.
Thank you my friend.
What are you doing for the holidays??? This is very often a difficult time of year for a lot of people. How are holidays affecting you??? Maybe this explanation is too obvious?? I have a lot going on right now, and I'm really stressed, but I know what's effecting me. Do you know what's really effecting you right now???
Yes, AGE and hard things that comes with living life. For some reason this time around with the depressive episode, I haven't been able to bounce back as quick as I had in the past. It feels like everything is catching up with me, especially the past 5 yrs. have been hard ones. I am a go getter in the doing what I have to do when I'm in a episode to get better. It just feels like right now it won't pass because it is lingering longer than before. Thanks for being here, it means more than I can say.
do you belong to AARP??? I don't, necessarily,swear buy them, but, I think they can really help people over 50 years old. If you join, it's relatively inexpensive and they deal alot with getting older.
Thanks felicitous!
Hello Ladybyrd!
I feel I'm in the same boat as you. I'm in my 50s and have always had high anxiety & depression. It can get pretty dark (ok, really dark). Always here if you want to chat.
Thank you Belovedxinfinity, just knowing someone is here and understands is a help.
Hi Ladybyrd, I’m sorry to hear you’re having a tough time. I’ve been experiencing similar days myself. What’s really helped me is just grounding myself through the anxiety and letting myself know I am okay, and this will not last forever. A good resource I have found from a friend on here is the DARE app. Look it up on the App Store. It has helpful resources, meditation and a new way of managing anxiety. I know sometimes that’s not what we want to hear but the more I accept my feelings and thoughts, a little bit easier it gets to make it through the day. I wish you the best and hope you can give yourself some grace today. Hang in there.
Thanks SportsGuy17, I'll look up the DARE app. Your exactly right, I don't except my feelings or thoughts when I'm in a depressive episode. I fight it thinking that's the right thing to do. No one really has ever said that before in that way. You have been a help, thanks for being here, I usually don't offer myself grace, but I'll try.
i understand what you are feeling, as I deal w the same sort of thing. Just know you are not alone, you are not weird, and you are not wrong. Reaching out this way takes courage. Good for you!
I am hear to listen 💖💖
Thank you Lovesdogs2 for your kind words. Just knowing others understands is a help and encouragement.
I am right there with you. Yes it nice to know that we are not alone. I know from experience for works for one may not work for someone else or what worked the last time may not work this time. It does help to talk with others. Take care. Hugs and prayers.
Thank you BedBug, you are right when you say what work's for someone today may not the next time. That's were I'm at, I've been dealing with MDD and anxiety for decades. These things that worked in the past no longer work for me. The last known thing to me was Ketamine therapy. I took 8 rounds, it helped for a while and then stopped. I feel like I'm in a box right now and can't get out. Hopefully, some changes in meds will be a help. Thanks for the post.
Anytime.
Hello there. I am sorry to read about your struggles. I would love to be a friend. I'm not on here much but I'll keep an eye on any replies from you. Try to smile and breathe.
Thank you LostScorpio for your friendship. It's always a help in the knowing you have people around you who care.
It's my pleasure really. I text a lot on my phone so I'm not on here much. ☺️
Hi --Reading through all the posts, and So glad that you have All these people on HU that Really Do care & that you are not alone. I am older than you being in my late 70's! Have had Anxiety longer that I care to say. Get depressed, too, from time to time. Anxiety waxes & wanes --meaning someday, or Months are worse than others, and have had periods where things were okay, and even good. Being older brings it's own challenges even to those without an Anxiety Disorder, or a Depressive disorder. Even though, I am wiser (yes, that's true), I have Many regrets that I just didn't have the proper help for So many years with my anxiety/depression. In my time, most people just didn't speak about their struggles as the Stigma was SO horrible that many younger people have NO idea how it was in those "dark ages" of being with a mental, or emotional illness. But, when I was young, I had the energy & stamina to carry on with college, work even though it was Rough & I would come home & collapse to bed. As I to older, those Panic Attacks dwindled my energy & stamina to the point of being completely exhausted. I could not function. Luckily, I had a very kind & caring Mother who took me in (even tho. she hadn't a clue what was wrong with me), and cared for me till I got stronger. Well, to make a Very long story short, I was able to carry on (& off), for many years. Had a lot of setbacks, but learned a lot mostly on my own. Had therapy, meds., etc. Now, I see that getting older brings it's own set of challenges. Loss of both of my parents, loss of my Sig. Other of 27 years, loss of a best friend since we were in grade school! Plus, physical & mental health issues. Loss of my home (another long story) being homeless & having to stay with relatives for awhile. Being older is not for "Sissies," so they say & I agree! All we can do is one day at a time (trite, but true), relay on our "tools" that we have learned through the years, Pray A LOT, KNOW we are not alone, do a little each day even if it's just a little thing! It's a Struggle, it's NOT our doing per say. So glad, as I said before, that you & All of us have each other on this HU site. Thanks!
&
Thank you Weatherwoman for sharing your heart. You have been through allot of losses over the years and it's very understandable that you feel the way you do. Your right when you say, getting older is not for "sissies", I with you sister on that one. Adding depression and anxiety on top of that alone can feel unbearable at times. It seems the older I get the more it takes it toll both physically and mentally. You have nothing to regret, we don't always understand why things happen like they do. There are so many could of, would of, and should of, to go around for all of us here. It becomes a vicious cycle to our mind and emotions,that at the end of the day we are so exhausted we have nothing to give to ourselves or other's.
Others know more about mental health than ever before, but unfortunately the stigma is still their. That's why this forum and community, is here to go to. Someone usually answer back to a post sometimes up to a couple of days. So don't let that discourage you. If for some reason they don't get back with in a timely manner, post again.
If you need to talk on a more personal level they have a chat button on the bottom of the page that you can use to.
You are stronger than you think and allot of lived experiences that can help others here. We are all here learning from each other and you could be a help to someone who has had similar experiences. Thank you for your post, I'm glad I'm not the only old person on here🤗
Thank you for your post & I agree that both of us have lived experiences that could help others. I am fairly good at helping others (friends, etc.), but not so good with my OWN suggestions -Today, I had an appt. with my Grief Counselor that gave me "homework," like Diag. Breathing, Relaxation Exercises, etc. to do Daily. Also, she suggested a Yoga Tape, Meditation Ex. Well, I Know this will help (it has when I DO them), but do I do them --Not that much! We could blame our depression, or interia & that could be a good excuse. But, we need to DO, not just "talk," but, "walk the walk!" So, I asked my counselor to hold me accountable (she can be Too easy on me which is good, and not so good)! So, I will Make myself do the "homework," she suggested! Yes, getting older & having Anxiety & or Depression makes it harder than most & feels unbearable, at times -Agree. Yes, the Stigma is still out there, and glad we have this community to give, and to share. Don't feel strong a lot of the times! Guess, we are stronger than we think & it takes a lot of courage to go through All that a lot of us have been through, and going through. Obviously, we have lots of company on here!
Thank you Weatherwoman, it does seem we are not helping ourselves when we try to help others. I think it helps to solidify what we already know when we do tell our lived experiences about mental health. Just in the trying in that alone is doing something, at least your trying. That's huge in its self, it just doesn't feel that way because of the depression. You feel like your not walking the walk and talking the talk. Give yourself credit for just doing the little things each day. Give yourself some grace each day. You are stronger than you think just in the doing. Each day is a gift to start anew so as long as your breathing your still in the race. You already have been a help here. Thanks for sharing!
I like what you said re. that just in trying that's Huge in itself. True --sometimes, I forget that! We need to give ourselves credit for the trying, for the doing of little things --another good point to point out! Yes, each day is a gift to start anew! I am So glad to be of a help here --it does make me feel good, too, to be able to help others --It's just that I Need to take my Own advice & I do, but need to more. Yes, the depression can get in the way, or the Anxiety, but we ARE trying & doing & helping others in the process. So glad for this community!
I hear you. Sometimes I go to a new place and I feel for some reason people shun me or just don't connect with me. I would much rather stay home and sit with my dog, listen to the radio, music, tv, write a letter, read. It's getting harder and harder to try and connect with people. In the morning and for some reason on Sunday I get really depressed. Oh wow? What to do. I pray everyday for all of us God will lift the anxiety and depression and hold us in his arms. You can always friend me if you like and I will give you my email and we can chat whenever you like. That goes for anyone here.
Penpallady35, thank you for your post. I am the same way when it comes to people. I have a Labradoole dog named "Bella", that I would rather talk too. For me, Sundays are harder to, maybe it's because most people are off from work on that day and everything seems to slowed down a bit. Not a whole lot going on and a day for reflection. We tend to evaluate ourselves more on that day on how our life has been during the week. So there can be many reason you feel that way on Sundays. Part of the distancing from others is the depression speaking or not😊. If you've had allot of rejection throughout your life, and I know how that feels, you tend to reject others before they can reject you. Part of that too is your Temperament, I don't know if you have done a test before, but I think if you go online and type Temperament test you may find it their.
If you want to chat more on a personal level you can go to the bottom of the page and tap the chat button.
Thank you for your post, it certainly has been a help to know others struggle with the same things. We feel less alone when we can make that heart connection. Hope you have a peaceful day.
Bless you, I understand how you feel. I have anxiety and agoraphobia and am stuck at home alone 24/7. The depression that comes alongside is real, the lack of motivation and gut wrenching guilt. no idea how knowing this helps except to know you are not alone. More people than you imagine are struggling out there.
Lostinlife52, thank you for your post. You sharing your experiences here does help others feel less alone. There are so many, like you said, that are struggling out their. The stigma about Mental Health keeps others from reaching out and getting the help they so need. If you feel comfortable sharing here, have you been able to reach out to get some help with your with the anxiety and agoraphobia? You can always use the chat button below to if you would want to share in that way also.
I would love to be friends. You described my life too.
Not what you're looking for?
You may also like...
Anxiety...Need a friend
everyone, I'm new to the group. I've been dealing with anxiety and depression for years now, but...
Feeling alone, In need of a friend
I don't feel like I can talk to anyone about how I'm feeling. I had to stop working because of...
Scared and needing a friend
Hi. I haven't posted in a long time, but am dealing with some serious anxiety.
I'm 60, and can't...
Need a friend.
online friend, nothing sketchy, just someone to offer support, and who i could support too. I...
Need a friend 
Need a friend
Need a friend
Need a friend
Friend in needModeration team
ADAATeamLisePartner
ADAATeamRachelPartner
