Hello my people. Today is an okay day. not crying, not feeling shame or regret, but not taking necessarily all the steps that I could be. I kind of stalled. But that's okay because this is all in My timing. This is how it goes for me and all I can do is just keep moving forward. At least right now I want to move forward.
There have been times when I have felt so bad about myself, bad about my circumstances bad about my choices. I think they call that self-pity? I don't know for sure I don't necessarily feel like I pity myself but I'm sure sometimes I do. I'm actually very happy with who I am at my core. I believe in kindness, love, peace, being fair even when others may not be. I believe in helping other humans. And I found it true to be the fastest way to help yourself is to help somebody else. Doesn't even have to be a huge event, just help.
So that side of me I really really like and then of course there's the shadow side. The sad, lethargic, fearful, beat myself up, negative thinking, not interested in people or hobbies or things that used to please me. Can't do anything right, sometimes feeling like a victim.
That side is sometimes more powerful and I'm not sure why. I hoped I wished love could rule over fear. With me, sometimes it doesn't.
Thank you guys to those who respond, those who like, it always helps me see things that may not be so obvious to me at the time.
Take care and be well
Montana