Resilience article Looooove this!

[Starrlight]

hackspirit.com/?p=66357

[Artistfriend]

I clicked on it and got an article about grief and what not to say to someone

[Starrlight in reply to Artistfriend]

sorry see below I will write the key points

[OtOFrance]

Hi Starrlight

Obviously, need to register to read anything ... Can you please post a summary of the article ?

Love from France

O

[Starrlight in reply to OtOFrance]

the following is what resilient people don’t do:

Letting small things or people ruin your day,

Isolating yourself when you feel low,

Seeking validation from everyone but yourself,

Giving up easily,

Changing plans because other peoples’ opinion.

[Starrlight]

Hope Artistfriend and OtOFrance are well today!!!!! ❤️

[Artistfriend in reply to Starrlight]

Hope things get better as the day goes by for you, im sure they will 😊

[Starrlight]

Hi AnxiousSilver!!!!!!!!! How are you?

[Starrlight]

I will now talk to myself and anyone reading … I watched a clip about a homeless person and i feel for her and it made me cry and now I am afraid I will be homeless in the future. I will write in my new anxiety book. I feel so sad. I’m seeing a friend later… maybe that will help.

[Artistfriend in reply to Starrlight]

Youre doing your best and taking care of yourself!

[Starrlight in reply to Artistfriend]

Oh that’s helpful to focus on Thanks Artistfriend!!!

[SoporRose in reply to Starrlight]

I understand why you feel that way. It's hard to walk the line between disabling compassion and the kind of compassion that makes us more useful people. I'm working on that myself — as I have been for many years. I admire that you can enter that deeply into the plights of others.

[Starrlight in reply to SoporRose]

Thank you. So I was really anxious the whole time I met with my friend. I don’t know why. And I’m doing too much for others right now. They recieve and I become tired and sad.

[SoporRose in reply to Starrlight]

It sounds like you had a rough time. Spending time with friends is vital, but when those visits are permeated with anxiety, they become, at best, a chore — even if the friend is not the source of the disquiet. If you're like me, you probably feel guilty for feeling anxious while you were with your friend.

I talk to my therapist about the tendency to put others before me fairly often. I find it kind of embarrassing and am afraid that it sounds as if I'm saying "Look at me! I'm so selfless and saintly! 😇 And everyone else is thoughtless and horrible.👿" But there is a real imbalance and it is exhausting.

Are you in a situation where you can ask your others to either support you more or at least lean on other people for a while? I know it's often difficult to impossible to dismantle systems once they're in place.

Are you feeling any better now?

Ruth