Help.. need guidance. Feeling sad frequently

[Montana136]

Hello I am kind of new and I've written a couple of posts. I'm working on myself I am currently trying to get over a very long episode of severe depression and anxiety. I'm taking steps forward and I'm doing that very consistently now. however I feel a lot of sadness and regret still. like depression robbed me of things that I wanted to achieve in my lifetime. I should have gone to college I should have had a career maybe even gotten married. Been successful. I can't tell you all the things of a traditional life that I missed because of depression and fear. So this path has been a long one, about 40 years. I've made a lot of mistakes in my lifetime I've messed up a lot of good things. Sometimes I can't help but be sad and cry when I'm alone. I somehow seem to think or tell myself that I should be over depression by now I should have mastered it with all the self-help books I've read and all the therapy I've participated in, all the groups, talking all the feelings out, I should not be suffering still after all these years. Surely I've done something wrong. I don't know why I can't finish it.. I think I'm beating myself up for something I may not be able to control. I am wondering what thoughts come to mind?.. I wonder if I'll ever be free of depression. I wonder how to manage it?? . Anybody have success stories? I'm totally open to anything anyone might have to say on this subject.. I am highly self-critical and sometimes I think so hard and often. I overanalyze everything and I can't seem to stop myself I always seem to be exhausted. I make things so complicated that I can't see obvious things staring me in the face.

I really need positive encouragement and guidance and I thank you all for reading this post. Be well! 😢

[LilyAnnepuppy]

I’m so sorry for your struggles. Yes, depression and anxiety have robbed me of a lot of life experiences I would have liked to have. But there’s no sense in living in the past. My therapist is working with me presently on mindfulness. It’s an important tool. I am safe in the moment. You can be too. A gratitude list helps me a lot. I can usually find something to be grateful for. I have a roof over my head. Clothes to wear. And food to eat. And a toilet that flushes.

I’m glad you share your problems. It gives us all a chance to be of service.

[Dolphin14]

Hi Montana

I'm so sorry you are struggling. Many of us here have been or are going through the same thing.

Unfortunately we can't fixed what our illness robbed us of.

You asked for positive stories. I will tell you with persistent hard work things will get better. It's a huge commitment and very draining.

Best of luck to you

🐬

[Optimist_Prime]

I just want to say that it's okay to feel sad, and I have felt sad at times for similar reasons. And I definitely understand the overthinking. Be gracious to yourself - you're making progress and that's something to be proud of, no matter where you are in the journey! Every step matters, so don't be down on yourself for not being where you think you should be. I know I've been learning to accept my past self and understand the reasons why I couldn't overcome the odds stacked against me. It doesn't happen overnight, but I hope you know you can embrace your past and present self with all your flaws and imperfections, and always believe in what you can become in the future, one day at a time. Your best years are yet to come, and that's something to look forward to! ❤️

A virtual hug for you, if you like hugs!

[Perriex]

Thank you for sharing. You've helped me by your phrasing... depression robs us of a life we could have had. It did the same to my dad.

"I think I'm beating myself up for something I may not be able to control."

I would agree. It's easy to do. Or if you're like me, compare & despair.

Overanalyzing is a trap I've fallen into over and over. It is definitely exhausting.

You are not alone! Remember the only constant is change, and even though we've been battling a long time, good days will come again.

💫💜💫

~P

[dogandcatlover27]

I know how you feel it doesn’t seem fair.What we could have achieved if only we hadn’t suffered from depression and anxiety.But it’s not our fault it’s an illness and we haven’t brought it on ourselves.Many things contribute to suffering with depression whether it’s our genes or having a bad childhood.I think They’s not a lot we can do….Maybe take our medication and have therapy.And when we do have an episode just remember we will get through it it won’t last for ever.When we come out of depression the world seems a beautiful place.Hopefully it won’t come back again if we’re lucky