New here - Alone here: I don't know... - Anxiety and Depre...

Anxiety and Depression Support

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New here - Alone here

45 Replies

I don't know what I'm hoping to gain here. I don't want to bum anyone out. It's just that I've been going up and down for so long now. I'm exhausted. And to be honest, there really isn't much up. I know it will always be this way and I want to say that's ok, but it's not. That's all. Maybe I just needed to tell someone. I don't know. I'm running out of ideas.

45 Replies
Agora1 profile image
Agora1

Welcome here badsalad. We are happy to have you with us.

No it's not okay to ride this roller coaster of life alone.

In this safe community of virtual friends, you will soon find that

you are not alone. We support each other as we struggle one day

at a time. My best to you :) xx

in reply to Agora1

Thank you. I hope so.

sherry71 profile image
sherry71

Nobody should be alone . If you ever want to talk, dont hesitate to reach me.

in reply to sherry71

Thanks so much.

SurvivorMoon profile image
SurvivorMoon

Hi badsalad,

Id be lying if I haven’t said those exact words several time these last few months/year. It’s lead me feel so hurt and horrible for feeling hurt. I feel the pain you feel and I understand why you feel helpless. I understand thinking that there is no real cure so therefore I can feel trapped in my own mind, wishing I had the ability that others have to regulate there emotions. I can feel like I’m the only problem which makes everything so much worse.

I practice this coping skill often.

Ask yourself,

1. What’s the absolute WORST thing that can happen right now in this moment?

2. What’s the BEST thing that can happen in this moment?

3. What’s the most LIKLEY thing th happen in this moment?

I have anxiety everyday, multiple times a day. I can feel like giving up a lot in the morning and late at night. But I haven’t and that’s something I praise myself on is continuing this fight. It’s never ending and it becomes monotonous but I promise this life have so much happiness and beauty to experience. Our brain can just make it almost impossible to see. It’s as if our own brain is fighting against us telling us we deserve to feel this way. But we don’t and we will keep fighting. Bc we know what it’s like when we are in darkness, the light will be that much brighter.

Keep fighting friend, keep asking for help and keep learning and growing. Nourish yourself as much as you possibly can. You deserve it.

in reply to SurvivorMoon

Thank you, SurvivorMoon. I've had some intense anxiety too recently and I've tried similar exercises. They did help a bit. Some days (or hours) are worse than others, and yesterday I was feeling pretty fed up. It's a bit better this morning. I'm still trying. Thanks again.

Darkhouse profile image
Darkhouse

Depression is an illness, and such, it can be treated. Have you tried medications to smooth out the up's and down's? It can take some trial and error to find the right one/ combo, but when you do, it can help fight back this thief of depression that lives inside your head that's stealing your joy. There are other treatments as well, if meds don't work. People on here have mentioned TMS therapy, with positive results. Also, talk therapy helps a lot of people. I'm so sorry that you feel so low right now. Know that you're not alone in feeling this way, and that people do find their way out of the darkness. I try to remember, when I hear the ugly voice in my head saying ugly things, even though it seems so real, it's just my illness talking, and it's a thief trying to rob me of my life, my joy, my happiness. When it really gets going I know I need to reach out and start therapy up again and/ or tweak or add meds to my cocktail. Hang in there, you're not alone... Feel free to vent any time. That's what this site is for 😊

in reply to Darkhouse

Hey Darkhouse, Yep, been tweaking the cocktails for 25 years now. Tried more than a dozen, that's part of why it's so disheartening. But hearing your words and getting all these caring responses does help. Thank you.

AXXES2 profile image
AXXES2

i understand how you feel dont be thinking that people dont want to help cause lot of us do cause we understand how you feel

in reply to AXXES2

It's actually quite good to hear that. I've sometimes not been so sure. thanks, AXXES2

AXXES2 profile image
AXXES2 in reply to

welcome to the best forum youll ever be in

I completely understand this feeling. Hopelessness and fear are really hard. I just joined this group today.

in reply to

Thanks Hidden, I'm a little new to be saying welcome, but that's how I've felt so you should too. It actually a bit of a surprise how hearing words like yours actually helps. I hope you stick around

Josana13 profile image
Josana13 in reply to

Welcome Hidden, I am so happy that you are here with us. You will find this group to be supportive and caring. Just keep sharing.

AnxiousSilver profile image
AnxiousSilver

"I don't want to bum anyone out."

You're not bumming anybody out.

.

"I don't know what I'm hoping to gain here."

That's OK. Sometimes just communicating helps. (both you and others)

in reply to AnxiousSilver

I see that now. thanks so much AnxiousSilver

SayNOtoPanic profile image
SayNOtoPanic

Don’t give up badsalad. When the goin gets tough the tough get goin. “Strength is born from weakness.” (Dr Weekes). Hugs and prayers.

in reply to SayNOtoPanic

Thank you. One day at a time. 💪

reinagrace profile image
reinagrace

I pray that you experience relief and comfort. if you are able to laugh at all, that's always a help. Sometimes I watch stand-up comedians on YouTube or try to watch funny movies. It is good to have online support here and to be able to communicate with others in writing but in-person support groups are great also as you can meet others Who have similar struggles and maybe hang out with them and do an activity together that's enjoyable or distracting. It says you're in Norway and I don't know what resources or groups there are there but I hope they're available. i do appreciate this website though and the support here

in reply to reinagrace

Thanks reinagrace, yeah, when it happens it can be great to laugh. There are resources here in Norway, but it can be hard to find your way through the system if you don't speak Norwegian. (which I don't) It does help you to hear from people like you, thanks again

moggie8 profile image
moggie8

Welcome everyone needs someone don't feel bad to ask

in reply to moggie8

Thanks for saying so moggie8. I do feel welcome

🙂 it does help knowing I'm not the only one.

Thank you!

mommieb profile image
mommieb

Welcome. We all have our daily struggles and different coping mechanisms. I do understand what you are saying. I have been struggling also, since 2003. When I found this site I felt much relief that I was not alone. Just reach out. We are all here for each other.

Thanks, I'm starting to see that. It is a bit of a relief

Chinaadventure profile image
Chinaadventure

Bad salad,

Good morning, just know that you were not alone. By taking a step and reaching out to this chat forward is one move in the right direction. I too have been suffering for years and the past couple of months have been horrible. I'm in the process of a medication change which is wreaking havoc on my body and my mind and my soul. We have to lean on the ones that know that can support us and help us. We have to find an outlet that will help us move in our recovery in a positive direction. Look at the small steps, take the good days hours and minutes when they come. Keep trying to find that thing that will help you move in the right direction and see things in a different perspective. There is so much out there on YouTube and online there are so many therapists that have recorded videos and exercises that you can take advantage of that are free. I'm not sure if you're in therapy but that also is a very good option. I'm not sure if you're on medication, but that is right now the only thing that seems to be moving me in the right direction. You were in a safe place here on this chat board No judgment no negative thoughts just positive feedback. Please keep us posted on how you do reach out whenever you need support or guidance. Here's a book that I found a few years ago that I refer back to many a times when I just need a boost. It's by Dr Robert Duff, he breaks it down into a real down to earth understanding of anxiety and depression.

Listen to Hardcore Self Help:

F--k Anxiety by Robert Duff on Audible. audible.com/pd/B00S8U7PKW?s...

Stay strong and know you are not alone. 🙏❤️🤞💪

in reply to Chinaadventure

Thanks Chinaadventure, I also find my meds are the only thing that help, even if only a little. I've been on more than a dozen so changing again doesn't fill me with a lot of hope. I am still trying though, and your words help. They all do. Thanks for the book rec. I'll check it out.

OtOFrance profile image
OtOFrance

Hello from France, Hidden

You are here with like-minded people, who think, who breath, who live and who act just as you do. And you are here with people who also have problems and question. This is the reason why you are the most welcome amongst us !

This is a safe and peaceful place to talk, discuss, laugh sometimes. With one single rule, respect everyone.

If you are ready - and I am sure you are - to follow this rule, then you are at the right place !

Let's start with an intro. I live in France, am 47 years old and I am married with a beautiful lady, 44 years old. I love boats, sailing and reading. Oh, and as any Frenchman, I love cheese !

Your turn !

Talk soon,

Love from France,

O

in reply to OtOFrance

Hey O,

Respect for everyone has always been my rule. Thanks for the welcome, I'm glad I found this place. And you're right, I should update my bio. I wrote it when I was in the wrong frame of mind. I'm 56, also married to an amazing woman, (who loves boats and sailing), always reading and, also always eating cheese. À la prochaine!

OtOFrance profile image
OtOFrance in reply to

GoodMorning Hidden

How do you feel today ? Fancy a piece of Camember, of Beaufort or Roquefort ? What sort of cheese do you usually enjoy ?

Whereabout do you sail ? What sort of boat do you own ?

Let's start discussing !

Love from France

O

in reply to OtOFrance

Hi O,

I'm doing a whole lot better today, thanks. I hope you are doing ok too.

I do like Roquefort, although I usually go for a variant called St Agur. But Camembert, Stilton, Feta, Halloumi, Gruyere, Gouda, bring it on! 'cept cottage cheese. Don't know what they were thinking with that one.

As for boats, it's just a dream at the moment. We're well positioned for it, close to the fjord. Maybe a little one next summer. Some are not too expensive here.

How about you O? How are things? It's been years since I've been to France. I haven't been to the countryside though, mostly Paris, and some down south. I'd like to drive through someday.

All the best!

BS

SayNOtoPanic profile image
SayNOtoPanic in reply to OtOFrance

cheers to fromage 👍🏻

OtOFrance profile image
OtOFrance in reply to SayNOtoPanic

Hello SayNOtoPanic

Nice to hear !

What cheeses do you fancy more ?

Love from France

O

SayNOtoPanic profile image
SayNOtoPanic in reply to OtOFrance

Hellloo!! I fancy Camembert, brie, Swiss, Gouda, parmesan, and of course the traditional like cheddar, Monterey Jack, pepper Jack lol. How about you? You got the real cheese over there in france. My sibling lived there a while several years ago. She’s our piece of French love.

ShakeyD profile image
ShakeyD

What do you mean by "there really isn't much up"

in reply to ShakeyD

I just meant that it's mostly all down. My mood that is. Sorry, I tend to write less clearly when I am really down.

Zan999 profile image
Zan999

Welcome & thank you for your post. You are in the right place & thank you for sharing your experience with us.

in reply to Zan999

Thank you, I'm really amazed at the kind support I've already seen.

JohnPB profile image
JohnPB

Hi badsalad, This is a place where we are free to share our struggles. We need each other. Life is too difficult to go it alone. Thanks for your willingness to be vulnerable. Bicycle John

in reply to JohnPB

I appreciate the warm welcome and the kind words. Thanks JohnPB

JohnPB profile image
JohnPB in reply to

You're welcome.

Pitalife profile image
Pitalife

You truly aren't alone here ,it may feel like that till u discover tons of us feel similar to what you describe, you will learn n gain from sharing and doing self help, I've given up on counseling because of redbtape BS..so helping myself is a big step and sharing..alot caring folks here n it truly helps if u let it..

Josana13 profile image
Josana13

Hello Bedsalad, I assur you that you are not alone. you are in the best place you could ever be. We have people here that are incredulous. They have done so much for me and are continuing to do so. With love and blessings

in reply to Josana13

Thanks Josana13, it's great just know someone hears you.

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