Starting antidepressants/anxiolytics has been hard...

[TheOneWhoIs]

So I've dealt with depression and anxiety for years and about 6 months ago, after a traumatic 2 week bout of dpdr, I decided to seek out the help of a psychiatric med-aide to get on some anti-anxiety and antidepressant meds. We started out with trying SSRIs and other serotonin-based meds but I've turned out to have a proclivity toward serotonin syndrome, so we eventually decided it was best to stay away from serotonin meds altogether. I've had little success with anxiolytics apart from Klonopin, however, Klonopin has proven to come along with some memory side effects which I don't like, so I've decided to stop it. That brings me to today, one week into a bupropion prescription and I don't know, I suppose I'm just feeling daunted and overwhelmed by the whole experience. The increased anxiety, a side effect of the bupropion,has been difficult to cope with and the stress of the past 6 months as a whole has done a number on my nervous system as well as my sense of hope. I feel bupropion is sort of my last attempt because things like tri-cyclitics and MAOIs come along with memory side effects as well. I've started therapy again (for the 2nd time) around the same time as I started seeing my med-aide and that's stirred up a lot of scariness and overwhelmed all it's own and I feel I need something so help keep my head above water so the thought of bupropion not working out for me scares me, which further compounds the anxiety I feel. My purpose for writing this is mainly to vent but if anyone who is in/ has been in the same boat has any words of wisdom/encouragement I'd greatly appreciate it.