when are people going to figure out that it is wholly rude and hurtful to probe others about why they do not have any children! I mean, breeders, gimme a break!!
especially when meeting a person for the first time!!
Why does it always have to be in the first 3 questions upon introduction, do you have any kids!!
I get that it is a courtesy question for most people, but in my opinion, it is so dreadful!! Just take me for who I am in the moment right before your eyes!! If I had any kids, then do you not think they would be by my side in that moment already!!
It is even worse than, what do you do for a living! Just accept me for who I am right now and do not try to pigeon hole me so you can brag about how rich you are or what a great job you have!!!
then after some one tells you, I am child-free, then please just let it go!!
Do not probe that person about why they do not have children, because its just rude and hurtful especially when you are not going to get an answer that is truthful or pleasing to your judgement.
I honestly just do not even feel like meeting people anymore because it is always about breeding!
Not all of us are designed to breed an army! Further some of us who really want children and could not have children are dragged through the mud everytime you probe on about it!!
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JPMcG
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I don’t think “do you have kids?” Is rude. “Are / when are you going to have kids” is very rude.
Reason is that kids are a huge part of a parent’s life so that is a reasonable thing to talk about. If the answer is no (which is all it needs to be) then next topic. The question doesn’t pigeonhole you unless you let it.
What is annoying is not getting a promotion because you aren’t married…real statistic… and losing a promotion because you decided to have kids. Imagine a man losing a promotion for having kids..if anything it helps a man.
yikes! How stepford. Speaking of “don’t worry darling”… very good movie. Totally creepy. Definitely hits the whole “when are you going to have kids” thing.
Hah! Out of four only one was luke warm. Harry Styles was convincingly d**k-ish. There is a lot I could say about it. Look for the little extra messages too. They are not always obvious on a small screen. Woman director appropriately.
With are you married its ok in a social situation and isnt rude in itself.
Its asking someone why they are married or why they arent thats rude!
Years ago i was in my 20s and got asked if i was married and i had said no and got asked why not so i had said how i would get married when i was ready for it and that i did in my 40s!
I definitely empathize with this. I want kids and I’m 35 and don’t have any. It literally cuts like a knife when people ask me about it. Especially, when I’m reconsidering biological children since there is an 80% chance they will be bipolar like me. I’m sorry you’re dealing with some truly disrespectful people. No one should be invading your privacy in this way.
“no” is the only response you need. No need to explain further.
I’m a 52 year old woman who decided not to have children. What really bothers me is how some people can be really nosy and they’re wondering if I had an abortion. No, I did not, and that is no one’s business anyway!!! Some people out there are very rude. And sometimes if I’ve gained some weight or my stomach sticks out a little bit I’ve been asked if I’m pregnant. If I don’t know you very well you have no right to be asking me questions like that!!! Some people just have no manners. I do feel somewhat sad that I never had children. Now I’m going through menopause, it’s just not happening.
Not regretful. I would not have been good. Better to know that.
Last week I was upset when someone i dont know very well started to probe me about why i am leaving my job shortly and i had made something up as i didnt want to say i have been sacked and had said im not happy and to that got asked why arent you happy so i said about bullying and they said about the wellbeing service which is rubbish and then asked had i got another job to go to and i lied and said i had and made one up just to get them off my back!
One of my friends had said how dare they probe me like that and had laughed when i said how i had made a job up to get them off my back!
Sometimes people can just find out things without us volunteering information. Still, having information, shouldn't be an excuse to probe someone about that information. I think some people need to learn to mind their own business and overcome the tendency to be nosy. And if people want to be nosy then there's nothing wrong in politely changing the subject or if they persist being firmer.
You're right, asking why someone doesn't have children is soooo inconsiderate. Especially of strangers/acquaintances.
Might I suggest (for a bit of fun) that when they insist and pry, you switch subject to pets or hobbies and attempt to convince them to get for example a snake as a pet or I dunno, skydiving as a hobby 😂 Tell them how amazing it is!! Lol
Hello JPMcG, I do agree with you. As someone who would have liked children and could not for health reasons, when I say no, but I have step children I almost feel a failure for not having my own. Please take care and remember we are all individual who are unique in our own way and if people don’t like that perhaps they are not right for us as friends. 🙏
For me the question Why someone has no kids is really a no go. The possibilities are I just don’t wanna have children, I am not in a relationship in which I am at a point to start a family or someone is not able to.
Most people tell me I am very bad in Smaltalk, but when there is nothing else I could ask a person than that, we should better enjoy the view out of the window.
At the other hand it’s very strong connected with sex , and I don’t get into such a topic after a short amount of time
I know right! They're so annoying. As If the planet isn't overpopulated already. As If it's not dying. As If there isn't global warming, pollution, starvation, wars(i have two wars nearby and both of them have the more hostile side holding all the fuels, and without fuels prices are insane high and economy is collapsing, we changed like 5 governments in 2 years, i'm 22 and i have voted more times than someone who's like 90), don't forget pandemics and of course depression. I didn't want to be here. And i still don't want it. I don't know why people brag about reproducing. I will brag about breathing and eating then. Lol. Anyway i don't see other reason to brag about manufacturing offsprings than handling the difficult is like pregnancy, taking care of a crying being, giving money for it and working hard for them. Like this bragging is to compensate for the pain. Other reason might be just biology and the biological reaction to sucsesfully spreading their genes. Other reason is some barbarian* cultures think they should brainwash everyone to pathriarchy and blindfold them for their opression. And yet nobody is this blind. The women of these * cultures are already being killed for seeing through the curtains and rioting. Sorry for the essay 😅 nihilist humanitarian science student here
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