How do I stop worrying about my adult son who is going through a personal crisis? I am an absolute mess, anxious, can't eat, heart racing, dry mouth, etc. I know that I have to stop thinking of what I cannot control, but I am so anxious because of what he's going through. I have tried meditation, it really doesn't help. I started therapy and am on meds, but they're not helping. I am really suffering here.
Any suggestions on how to start feeling better?
You got one thing absolutely right - you cannot control another person's life. I had to learn this the hard way with my own adult son, whose horrible choices messed up his life so badly. For a while I made the mistake of trying to "fix" him before finally learning to detach with love.
You don't say what's going on with your son, so I'm not sure what to say. If it's a mess he got himself into, he will have to figure out a way out of it like a grown-up, with your emotional support. If it's a horrible breakup of a relationship, that's always hard, but nearly everyone goes through it and comes out the other side. If he's having a breakdown of some kind, encourage him to find professional help asap. Remember the old saying, "This, too, pass." It will. As odd as it sounds, he may learn from this crisis - and some day be able to help someone else going through the same thing.
Thank you for your supportive reply! My son is having a career crisis and broke with his girlfriend.
{{Sedonalover}} It sounds like you need hugs as much as your son does!💓
Yep, thanks so much for reaching out! I feel your pain with your son.
Hi Sedonalover one of the hardest jobs in life is being a mother. When they are young
we worry but are more in control of their issues. Once they reach adulthood the solutions
become more difficult but the love we have for our child doesn't change. Making it a hard
situation to be in. Of course, we don't want them to hurt for anything however how can
they grow and develop life experience?
We may not be able to change what they are going through but only support them with
love and understanding. In order to do that, we must take care of ourselves. If not, we can't
help anyone.
I understand since I am in the same position with my daughter. I keep a balance each day
by living in the moment and not looking back at the past or projecting the future. One day
at a time, one moment at a time.
I personally use daily Meditation/Breathing morning, midafternoon and night. I don't wait
until the moment of distress but continue this pattern day after day. It prepares both my
Mind and Body to handle the stress of life.
Do Not give up on yourself or your son. Experience in any form takes time and time takes
patience. I'm happy that you are here with us. We're always open in helping each other 
xx
Agora1, thank you so much for sharing that! I have tried meditation/breathing many times; while it may calm my body a bit, it hasn't done much for my mind. I keep ruminating on things constantly. I so appreciate hearing about your daughter, and your perspective on taking care of ourselves. I am struggling so much with trying to not think about the future or how much my son is struggling. He is starting therapy this week, and he needs it badly. He gets so down on himself, lacks confidence in certain situations, and feels so lonely right now. THANK YOU for responding; your post made me cry!
Sedonalover, I didn't want to make you cry but now know that I touched your
heart in a way that only another mother truly understanding can make you feel.
I care xx
Thank you again!
I am very sorry!
In the Bible there are words that Jesus left us about worry and the fact that God will be with us all the time.
Unfortunately, worrying excessively is not easy to control or stop, but each one of us can always ask God for help.
It is true that God is in control of the universe and that our lives are in His hands. It's a big blessing that there is Someone who is able to help us and who cares about people.
Medications and therapy can be very helpful and sometimes we have to continue the medications and continue the therapy because not everything in life works instantly.
Sometimes, you and the doctors who treat you will learn which meds work and which don't with time. Healing cannot be hurried. But it is very important and necessary to continue treatment, if you need it.
And even though I don't go out for walks as frequently as I should, I do believe that walking outdoors can help immensely. Many doctors have recommended it for benefits for us physically, emotionally, psychologically... I hope it's something safe for you to do and that you are able to do it regularly.
Things are easier said than done, but I would also like to tell you that you are not alone. There are other people who have felt or presently feel the same way you do. And even though we do feel loneliness inside, the truth is that God is always near.
I hope that God gives us all faith and hope and strength. I hope that God blesses you and your son a lot!
Desperately need advice
Need some support and advice
Need medicine advice. 
Need support and advice
