Am back again. Loner and Depressed

[TyrSwimmer_Sac]

So about me I've used this site before and it helped. I met couple of people that helped ground me for past couple of years via texting back and forth. I had been slowing losing touch with them and now pretty much don't hear from them at all. Nobody's fault just people living their lives when they get steady.

No so much with me. Am still pretty much a loner though I get severely depressed and been getting more and more panic attacks. Life has me on edge. I've been single for years, my last relationship was an insane train wreck which still bothers me to this day, I work all the time as it keeps me going, and I share a home with my sister who is so psychotic she is potentially a danger to me (long story there). Life has little to no real pleasure and loneliness is so painful my suicidal ideations are returning. I am under a psychiatrist care and taking medications. Just struggling.

[thara9643]

hi

[Dolphin14]

Welcome back

🐬

[PapaDocs]

How are you doing? I hope that you are doing better. Sometimes life lets us down because we have a certain idea of what our life should like and we get depressed when we don’t get it. It might help if you learn to be thankful for whatever little you have. You are getting medical help and medications, and that might physically be helpful but if you boost your mind and your emotions it might make those meds work better. Start small. Be thankful if you can walk and are generally healthy. Be grateful if you have food and place to stay, freedom to enjoy your surroundings and get fresh air. Some people around the world do not have these or cannot do some of these. There must be away to forget some of the memories that bother you. One way is to replace them with good experiences, good reading such as verses in the Psalms in Bible or other uplifting books, good movies or plays, music. You can still enjoy life even if you are alone, doing things alone and enjoying things life has to offer even if you are alone.

[TyrSwimmer_Sac]

Thanks for the kind words. My life's journey isn't over yet and hope is pretty much all I have, since the other things seem meaningless. Still your thoughts have not fallen on deaf ears. I have been in the service of my parents since childhood right up to both their deaths. My mother who loved me unconditionally and my father who loved me so long as he believed me to be something I wasn't. The last one's to love me. I thought I had a loving life long partner but it well a complete sham after 27yrs. Long story there but suffice it to say it was a complete loss as their is no reprieve from unrequited love. Finding and/or waiting for another chance at love seems unlikely, though there is still hope. Right now I'd settle for a good friend that I can just look forward to talking to. Anyway times are bad and am stumbling my way for as long I can forward.